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New user? Old user? Lurker? We'd love your views.

(449 Posts)
LaraGransnet (GNHQ) Fri 10-Jan-20 16:27:00

We're really happy to read threads like this and know that the site is hitting the mark with you. But we also know that for all of you who are regular posters, there are many more who, for whatever reason, haven't yet joined in on the discussions and we wondered what could be done to make the site more welcoming to newbies? If you are new (or can remember back to when you were) what barriers do you think users may come across that stop them from joining in the chat? And if you are a lurker (although we prefer to think of you as reader) if you're happy to post just this once to let us know what stops you usually, we'd really appreciate it. Any insight you can give us be most welcome and rewarded with a virtual bottle of wine grin
Thanks
GNHQ

joannapiano Sat 11-Jan-20 14:46:19

Unfortunately, the games threads just keep on multiplying. I have been with GN since the beginning and don’t think Games was part of it then? I do understand that they are enjoyed by many.

Charleygirl5 Sat 11-Jan-20 14:48:12

matson I am gobsmacked that anybody could write that level of rudeness and sent it! I am amazed you bothered to stay but I can assure you we are not all like that.

BradfordLass72 Sat 11-Jan-20 14:51:29

What can you do to help make this a better place?

Firstly, not everyone wants to post. Some are quite happy just reading and taking what they need from Gransnet. That's just as valid as posting.

Secondly, it's clear all threads are moderated, so I have to wonder why a cautionary note is not sent to aggressive posters who hijack a thread with very unpleasant responses, as so many people have mentioend above.

As mothers, we try to nip our children's arguments in the bud before they deteriorates into fisticuffs!
So please do what it says on the box and Moderate.
It would be a more hospitable place if you did. smile

(and no, just removing a post with a twee note to look at guidelines, is not enough and clearly does not work)

It may well be in your T&C but far more obvious information about the fact you re-post our problems onto social media, should be given.

And I personally would like to see some of these freebies, posted out to New Zealand occasionally! grin

Mapleleaf Sat 11-Jan-20 14:54:24

I've been posting for about 3 years now, and on the whole, find it enjoyable and informative. I can understand why some new posters might think it can be a bit cliquey, but to be honest, I think it's more a case of regular posters get to know each other and if you continue posting too, you'll get to be recognised too. (Nannaandgrampy is saying similar, I think).

I'm sorry to read that you felt you met with a tirade of abuse when you first joined, Grandad1943 - that's just bad manners, and well done for continuing to post. Perhaps it is time for the logo to be re-looked at, as it does only show female silhouettes, along with a baby, which might be off putting. It looks quite unappealing, really.

I'm so glad that you came back too, marydoll - your posts on the GM thread often have me in stitches!

I suppose it is inevitable that there is always going to be a wide range of opinions and personalities, which is, of course, a good thing, but a dose of kindness and respect does go a long way.

BradfordLass72 Sat 11-Jan-20 15:03:59

Grandad1943 Good on you for braving the tirade and staying; never give in to bullies, I say.

I'd love it if there were more grandads posting - get out there and start recruiting! grin

goldengirl Sat 11-Jan-20 15:39:21

I'm a lurker nowadays though I post occasionally if I think I can help someone - or perhaps they can help me with a query. I'm busier now than I ever thought I would be and so don't have a lot of time to read all the posts on particular topics. I'm glad Gransnet is there though

Nortsat46 Sat 11-Jan-20 16:01:20

BBbevan I often notice and read your posts and am sorry you feel unacknowledged. ?
matson I too am astounded that you received a PM in the manner you describe. What a bl**dy cheek. How dare she ... whoever she is ... Actually on reflection it’s pathetic ... pay no attention.
Grandad1943, I enjoy your posts on the (few) political threads I do participate in. Sorry to learn you experienced such unpleasantness initially.

I just ignore the nastiness now ... I and one or two other posters were condemned as ‘the mean girls’ recently. It was untrue and unnecessary and in fact laughable.

I have had months of ill health in the last year and have had time to spend on GN. IMHO there is still lots of good stuff which is worth coming back for ... ?

BlueBelle Sat 11-Jan-20 16:03:59

Bbevan just so you know your not unnoticed ?

AGAA4 Sat 11-Jan-20 16:08:43

I am new to GN and have posted for the first time today rather nervously I must admit. I was worried that nobody would reply and I am so grateful to those who took the time to answer and advise me

annodomini Sat 11-Jan-20 16:21:02

I joined just two weeks after GN started. I have made a number of friends, some cyber and some also in RL. I have a regular meet-up with one friend for coffee and gossip. I lost one good friend some years ago - she's still greatly missed by many of us. I think it was we, in the NW, who the first ever Gransnet meet-up when Carrie and Lara both visited us.
I know it's inevitable that, with newbies arriving all the time, old topics return time and again and it's no use objecting that 'we've been here before', because many people haven't. However, it does annoy me when someone digs up an old thread and when I log on, it looks like a new one and I put in my penn'orth only to find, on looking at previous posts, that I had already posted, perhaps years ago!
For these reasons, I don't post as much as I did initially, especially on political topics: I've said it all before and I don't want to keep on reiterating my opinions which I am not going to change and which won't change anyone else's, so what's the point?

Cabbie21 Sat 11-Jan-20 16:29:08

I agree that the site can be a bit cliquey, as some long term posters obviously know each other well. Sometimes I feel I am being ignored, as a conversation goes on around me.
But on the whole it makes an interesting read. Some days I join in, some days I just read.

quizqueen Sat 11-Jan-20 16:39:24

I find the 'old favourite' regular posters can get away with saying whatever they like and are supported to do so but others, who are not in the gransnet clique, get told off by the moderators after complaints because someone expressed their true and honest opinions.

I restrict my comments now mainly to the political threads rather than those about people's problems because I think a lot of the posters bring some of their troubles on themselves but, now my side has 'won', effectively, there's not so much to say.

lemongrove Sat 11-Jan-20 17:26:30

Quizqueen ?......I agree.

Having read all the comments on here, it just shows how different we all are, and what we gain/ dislike about GN.
I suppose the answer is to only choose the threads that interest us, and if there isn’t much that does, start your own threads about a subject.
I have virtual friends on here and quite a few in real life, who I see at regular meet ups.I like some of the games and lighter threads, anything a bit fun.Politics interest me, but after all the angst about Brexit and the GE, am now content to not bother much with them.
I have benefited from advice( on products) quite a lot too, as well as shared recipes, holiday advice.There really is something for everyone.

BBbevan Sat 11-Jan-20 17:52:05

Thank you Nortsat46

BlueBelle Sat 11-Jan-20 18:54:10

Bbevan now whose feeling ignored ???

BBbevan Sat 11-Jan-20 19:44:26

❤️❤️❤️

Marydoll Sat 11-Jan-20 20:13:55

Mapleleaf, your kind words are much appreciated. smile

Gymstagran Sat 11-Jan-20 20:14:04

I've been on gransnet for a while, reading mainly but posting sometimes. I am very aware this is a public forum and the level of details some posters give concerns me. Often posters tell you they are away from home or details of their day when they will be out and about. I know the names are not real but I'm sure it wouldn't be too difficult to track some people. This does mean I'm very wary of posting anything other than personal opinion or facts.

Tangerine Sat 11-Jan-20 20:54:02

I have never felt shy about posting. After all, you never see the other people on Gransnet.

The Word Games are my favourite threads although I know some people can't bear them.

I try to help people with problems and try and give measured advice.

I try not to spend more than an hour per day on Gransnet as I think you can get addicted to such things and I prefer to live mostly in the real world.

Gransnet must be a lifeline to the housebound.

Millie22 Sat 11-Jan-20 20:59:59

BBbevan
You have previously supported me so thank you from me.

BBbevan Sat 11-Jan-20 21:09:23

You are very welcome Millie ??

Opal Sat 11-Jan-20 21:18:14

I agree with quizqueen and lemongrove - the political regulars are very vocal and if you don't agree with them, they try to hound you off GN. It doesn't bother me, I'll have a go back, but I understand why it puts some posters off. Funnily enough, none of the aggressive posters have posted on this thread yet! Apart from that, there's lots of helpful suggestions and information from other posters on a variety of topics - enjoying the gardening ones at the moment smile.

Sara65 Sat 11-Jan-20 21:40:33

Every time I decide to pack it in , something stirs my interest again.

I certainly don’t feel that I’ve found any friends, there are a few people I think always post sound common sense, but many more sadly, who just seem to like the sound of their own voices.

I like a variety of subjects, I’m fickle enough to enjoy the odd chat about clothes, or household items, politics interest me, but I generally avoid getting involved, and as has been said before, it’s a bit like joining a club where everyone knows everyone else, not always very welcoming.

PamGeo Sat 11-Jan-20 21:48:36

I stumbled across Gransnet last year, took me ages to post anything, I'd felt like a rude eavesdropper until then.
I'm not on GN everyday and try to dip in and out when I can.

I am an estranged parent and had been struggling with all that brings emotionally but reading the threads has helped me gain a different perspective.

I don't like the truly disruptive argumentative posters who just seem to want an argument rather than be helpful or butt out but I find almost all the other gransnetters funny, witty, helpful and delightfully rebellious at times.

Long may you live to write and contribute.

I choose to ignore the annoying ones.

Cotswoldslass Sat 11-Jan-20 22:06:15

I stumbled on GN in the summer. I did put a problem out there and the majority of people were so very kind and helpful. I had one rather nasty reply and (funnily enough) I noticed on other posts that this person tends to post nasty replies so I have not taken it personally..I tend to lurk rather than post. Reading some posts I feel some people can get very personal and abusive. Such a shame but luckily they are in the minority. The majority of people of this site want to share their experiences in order to help others, and give their support.