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Help needed - tooth fairy

(39 Posts)
Buttonjugs Fri 14-Feb-20 22:39:53

I have my granddaughters for the weekend as I often do but tonight the youngest one lost a tooth. She’s asleep now and I have put money under her pillow but can’t find the tooth and I am really worried I will wake her up! Has anyone else had this problem and what did you do? I don’t want to be the person that exposes the myth of the tooth fairy! It’s been 20+ years since I last did it and I can’t remember not being able to find the tooth. Advice needed please!

M0nica Fri 14-Feb-20 22:48:27

If your DGD finds the tooth, just say the tooth fairy must have dropped it and you will put it on chest of drawers, or mantelpiece where she can get it tomorrow night. then make sure you remove it and dispose of it then.

Curlywhirly Fri 14-Feb-20 22:52:32

Well, if she wakes up and finds the money AND the tooth, you could say that you forgot to leave the lamp/night light/light on for the fairy so she could see where the tooth was; so maybe she couldn't find it, but left the money anyway, as she knew that your granddaughter had lost a tooth! Sorry, but it's all I can think of!

mumofmadboys Fri 14-Feb-20 22:58:50

I'm afraid I think it is awful to tell children untruths about tooth fairies!

Callistemon Fri 14-Feb-20 23:04:19

And Father Christmas momb?

V3ra Sat 15-Feb-20 00:46:03

Many years ago my youngest came downstairs very grumpy one morning.
"What's the matter with you?" I asked.
"Huh. Still not been I see," he huffed.
"Who's not been?"
"Tooth fairy. Three nights now it's been under my pillow and she's still not been."
"I didn't know you'd lost a tooth, you never said."
"What's it got to do with you?" he asked, still cross.

I snuck upstairs while he ate his breakfast and hid the 20p inside his pillowcase, and told him it must have been there all the time.
Thinking back he must have been of an age to make his own bed and brush his teeth himself for me not to have noticed. I was just amazed he actually still believed 🤣

Grandma2213 Sat 15-Feb-20 01:25:30

Just had a conversation with my 10 year old granddaughter who told me that her mum had 'sat her down' and told her there was no such thing as the tooth fairy, or Santa, or the Easter Bunny. I then chatted with her about how difficult it is to describe love, kindness and generosity to young children so that is how the stories have grown to help them understand. Love, kindness and generosity still exist so in a way so does the tooth fairy, Santa and the Easter Bunny even for grown ups. She was happy with this and also quite pleased to have joined the world of grown ups.

mumofmadboys Sat 15-Feb-20 03:03:43

Callistemon- yes and Father Christmas as well. We feel the reasons for Christmas are wonderful enough without the need to tell children about Father Christmas. Our kids always knew FC was a story. They still had presents etc. We felt it was important to tell our children the truth. My parents were horrified by our approach !!

Newquay Sat 15-Feb-20 04:24:41

Oh momb how I agree. We never told our children these tales especially about Christmas. We didn’t tell them outright what a load of nonsense Father Christmas is but we just didn’t go along with it either. They also received gifts and had a joyous time at Christmas too.

BradfordLass73 Sat 15-Feb-20 04:40:14

Having been interested in Greek, Roman and Norse (and now Maori) mythology most of my life, I see no good reason to pick on just a few harmless traditions and say they are lies.

No such thing as magic?
So don't read Peter Pan or Alice in Wonderland, in fact ban children's fiction altogether if you want to stick strictly to truth. All cultures have myths and legends and there are good reasons for that.

The modern world runs on lies and myths, one look at any newspaper or TV proves that and if advertisers didn't lie, they'd hardly sell anything, nor politician be voted in.

By all means, when they are old enough, tell them about the Bishop of Myra (ewhat little is known of him) and explain the reason behind Coca-Cola's advertising gimmicks but to sweep all the magic away somehow makes children grow up too quickly and takes the sparkle out of special occasions.

mumofmadboys Sat 15-Feb-20 07:22:05

When children read books (or are read to) they know this is a story and made up. It is entirely different.

Curlywhirly Sat 15-Feb-20 07:34:43

Well, as a child who was only 4 years old, and was told by her nightmare of an older sister that Father Christmas didn't exist, I can assure you that I was devastated and it completely took the magic out of Christmas for me! And when my oldest son no longer believed, (think he was about 8) I told him under no circumstances should he tell his younger brother; bless him, he then proceeded to go right over the top, "oh, I can hear Santa, he's on the roof " etc. Magical days.

M0nica Sat 15-Feb-20 07:37:23

Do they? One of my children would get deeeply upset about bad events, however trivial, in children's books, even though they knew it was a story. The fact that the author had invented a person meant they existed and suffered.

I have yet to hear of a single person whose life was damaged by believing in Father Christmas and the tooth fairy as a child. I speak only of those two fictitious people, so do not extend that argument to other lies parents tell children.

dragonfly46 Sat 15-Feb-20 07:46:04

It’s fine to tell your children that these things are not true but how did you prevent them from taking the magic away from their friends? Everyone needs a little magic in their lives and it does no harm.

Willow500 Sat 15-Feb-20 07:47:06

My 6 year old grandson lost a tooth while he was staying with us at Christmas. He wrapped it in a tissue and put it under his pillow but not before his 4 year old brother came to me and asked if I had a peanut? When asked why he said whenever his brother lost a tooth the fairy would also take a nut from under his pillow and leave him $2 as well (we substituted NZ$ for £2 saying the UK fairies only deal in sterling grin )

Their mum was saying that as eldest (who is on the autism spectrum) can't cope with lies/untruths she was going to have to explain to him all about Father Christmas this coming year - the youngest is such a smart cookie he'll probably work it out for himself before long! It's such a shame to take the magic away - although I'm sure mine knew for ages without letting on grin

Hetty58 Sat 15-Feb-20 07:48:44

My third child (a daughter) was utterly terrified at the thought of a strange man descending the chimney and leaving presents under the tree. She couldn't sleep.

She was only three, but we had to tell her that it was only a fairy tale. They were not allowed to spoil the magic for other children, though, so played along very well.

With the fourth child, we had a jokey approach to it all.

LullyDully Sat 15-Feb-20 08:03:02

The grandchildren lived with us during the teeth shedding years. We kept one of those tiny, hotel jam pots for them to put their teeth in. It saved all the fuss!

vampirequeen Sat 15-Feb-20 08:19:50

One night the tooth fairy forgot to come. The next night there was a 20p coin and a letter from Dopey Dora apologising. My DD took the letter to school and all her friends were so envious.

BlueBelle Sat 15-Feb-20 08:36:24

Oh what a shame to be so black and white and take away a little tiny bit of magic that lasts for such a small space of time
Are they lies.? Are they not just weaving a story surely that is wonderful for a child’s imagination
We never swapped God for Father Christmas they were two different things
Once we had tears when a tooth was lost at school so that night she drew a picture and a little note explaining and was thrilled to get her pennies however when she tried it again some weeks later (without a tooth) she got nothing and learnt an important lesson in truth
A very innocent small child ‘game’

grannylyn65 Sat 15-Feb-20 08:39:38

What ??? No Father Christmas 😱😱

yggdrasil Sat 15-Feb-20 08:59:24

The tooth fairy forgot to come to my daughter once. I told her she must have pushed it too far under the pillow so it couldn'tbe reached without waking her. So next night, it was on the edge, and the tooth fairy never forgot again. :-)

Dancinjay Sat 15-Feb-20 09:14:03

I remember long exchanges of letters to and from the tooth fairy, she was very scatty and often didn't make it on the appropriate day. As for FC, well real people give presents (their names are on them after all) but FC 'magics' them. It worked and my son now nearly 50 still refuses to admit that there is no FC and I caught him using the same explanation to his step children some years ago.

Urmstongran Sat 15-Feb-20 09:15:36

No wonder your parents were horrified momb! You had the magic yourself of Father Christmas (remember the outline of the parcels in the semi-dark and the fizz of wonder that ‘he’d BEEN!’? Yet you chose to deny it to your boys. Sad.

And then your boys would have to keep that secret from kindergarten up until ooh perhaps mid junior school. Poor boys - in my opinion.

Oopsadaisy3 Sat 15-Feb-20 09:23:20

My DDs loved the magic of FC and also the visit from the Tooth Fairy, DD1 passed this love on to our GCs and hopefully they will do the same for their children, childhood is fleeting and pressured enough, let them have some magic whilst they can.
TBH I’m shocked that parents don’t let their children have some magic in their lives.

Callistemon Sat 15-Feb-20 09:52:12

Well, of course, some would say that the Christmas story is not exactly truthful either, momb.

That reminds me of the vicar who went into school and told reception class there was no such person as Father Christmas, it's your parents. Then went into church to hold the Christmas services! Just as unbelievable to some.
He could have told them about St Nicholas and said he was immortal too and aka Father Christmas instead of leaving them sobbing.