Does anyone live in unsociable neighbourhood

I wave to neighbours if I see them or say Good Morning, nothing more, everyone tends to keep themselves to themselves. I am not great at social chat so it suits me fine. No offers of help. The first thing our next door neighbours did when they moved in 5 years ago was to remove the existing fence (about 4 foot high) and the mature shrubs and replaced it with a 6 foot (at least) fence, says it all really! We could not see into our neighbours garden before as the shrubs were so dense.

We are a curious mix, our road is mainly very old timberframed farmhouses wide to the street, but only one room deep, so there is a lot of space between one front door and the next, we know each other, are friendly, and have been in each others houses, but not often.

But no-one has asked us, how we are managing. Partly I think it is because we do not look or appear to be as old as we are, and we are out walking everyday, and going out in the car to shop etc but none of our family live near us and the neighbours know that, and we have chatted several times since the lockdown.

I am sure they would help if we asked and I would do so if I needed to, but it is curious that no-one has said anything to us.

The region of the state I live is socially distant- They're friendly to each other, their families having remained in one place for generations- Not so for newcomers- Even if the newcomer has lived in the village/town for decades-

Most of the families have formed bonds through their agricultural relationships- The only friendly farmer I've met came from the UK! She talked a blue streak and was a joy to listen to-

What the state does have to offer is affordability and doesn't tax social security - And .. It's pretty .. But the weather is cloudy except for summer months ..

We live in a road with mixed houses and different age groups. People are generally very friendly apart from those who allow their dogs to mess up pavements. I was brought up in a big family and always told to stand up for myself to anyone. People generally are polite however I can not imagine me putting up with anyone acting like washer women. Gossiping and acting like characters from a Catherine Cookson novel. I have a dear old friend and neighbour who we love. I have always cooked and looked out for her and the neighbour on her other side is helpful too. Treat people the way they treat you that's the best way to be politeness costs nothing.

Bought our house nearly 30 years ago from new, a little cul-de-sac; glad to say that half are still here, and newcomers have slotted in easily. Ever since lock-down we have had a weekly Sunday lunchtime drinks session. We all take our chairs and drinks onto our drives, and shout at each other across at least 10 metres!
Everyone is very sociable; we have an annual Christmas dinner out every year, plus coffee mornings, and help each other out. When DH died I couldn't have had more offers of help and support.
I always thought I would move if DH died, as I have a large garden and house to cope with, but there is no way I would now.

We’ve got a helpline in our village. I put my name down as a helper but no one needs help. Which is good.

Mine's a funny one. I live on the friendly side where most people have livec for decades. Nobody knows anyone else on the other side. Theyre not UN friendly I think just busier and more renters who move around

We live in a small block of 9 flats, 8 are occupied. A mixture of ages, some couples, some single ladies. We all get on and look out for each other.

By the way I should add I ve ‘only’ lived here 37 years ?
No not one note through the door people do come out to clap and I like that but no offers of anything else and no I m not in the south as such although I am south of the north ?

We are in the South, but our close of 16 houses has really come together, setting up a WhatsApp group early on, which we use to advise on who has a delivery slot and can add stuff onto it. We all come out on Thursdays, and use the opportunity to ask if anyone needs anything. When I mentioned we couldn't find flour, there was a ring on my doorstep a few minutes later and there was a bag on my doorstep.

Before this started I only knew the occupants of seven of the houses, but now I know the names of everyone, and have had chocolate cookies left on my step by a former stranger!

So I wouldn't call ours unsociable, we must be lucky.

We have a very sociable community. We have a Facebook group, so if anyone wants to borrow something/ has something to give away/ ask about bin collection or whatever there is always an answer. We have a summer street party and we had a pop up concert outside last weekend( people watching from their windows). I think it’s because we are in a private road and have to pay a maintenance charge, so have to have a management
Committee, residents association etc. So everyone gets to know everyone else. We only had one set of nasty anti social neighbours, but they moved away in the end.

In that case, Urmstongran, I’m a southerner - which is odd because I’ve lived in the north for the vast majority of my life.

Is this a North / South thing?

Northerners still just arrive on the doorstep to visit (in the olden day’s, before CV).

I think Southerners ring Or text ahead ‘to see if you’re home/it’s convenient’.

?

I would say our street is pretty unsociable, we are a mix of houses and flats. The flats are occupied mainly by 20 and 30 somethings, we see them have deliveries nearly every day, none of us oldies have been able to obtain any groceries. Not one young person has asked if anyone would like help with prescriptions or if they could bring a loaf of bread.
I have never heard anyone clapping on a Thursday.

I’m an incomer in our village but because I had a business in a nearby town I was ‘known’ so I know quite a few of the real , and more recent villagers and that is nice.
Whilst walking round the village in our new lock down mode its lovely to say hello to those walking in the opposite direction.
BUT to all you runners with your headphones on. You miserable *s.

Neighbors here have offered to help, but I have not needed anything. There's an active village Facebook group and all houses have had a leaflet through the door offering assistance. The pub is doing takeaways and delivering which some people like. So yes, have felt that people have pulled together.

The couple who live at the end of our Close are complete a*******s! They are both very good at minding everyone else's business except when it really matters!

If you've get it, they had it first, if you suffer from it they suffer worse, if you're going somewhere new they've been there before! Do you get my drift?

Generally, all the neighbours help each other out in any way they are able but not that couple, they wouldn't help anyone at anytime with anything!

Rant over!

No I don’t, although I am quite an introvert, and don’t initiate any social stuff.

But we’ve had a lot Of notes in the door with offers of help and telephone numbers.

Clapping Thursday has become very social with everyone lingering and chatting to each other.

We exchange Christmas snd birthday cards and we are part of a core group of about 10 and we exchange presents etc.
We also go to the local golf club every Christmas for a meal with lots of singing and excellent food.
The core of 10 plus anyone else who fancies coming goes out every quarter to restaurant or dinner/dance or whatever.
Plus other social events one if us is celebrating.

Actually written down it seems we are very social!!

BlueBelle, I know the feeling. The only time someone's knocked on my door in the past was for help ! Which I duly obliged----for the following 4+years.

I witnessed better friendship when I used to stay in Oz for 3 months at a time. I miss that.

Most folks around us are retired and older than us but still mobile and driving- all friendly and helpful as necessary and in fact one has just rung to see if I’d like some rhubarb!

The answer is yes please and she often offers fruit which I jam and give a jar back! Lovely neighbourhood and neighbours.

Our street has about 30 houses of mixed size. There is one older lady living alone and her family look out for her very well. Our neighbour across the road is a childless widower but he is a key worker and goes to work every day so no one needing support.
On Thursdays at 8pm there is a good turnout to clap for all key workers but I know that some streets in the area have a poor turnout.

I live on a main toad I know my immediate neighbours to say good morning to and one other lower down again to acknowledge each other
Not a soul has knocked on my door or asked if I need anything. I nodded at one through the window as she toddled off with her shopping bag to our local shop the other day

If it was the other way round I would have asked them all if they needed anything
Very disappointing really

Our road of about 20 properties is not unfriendly, but usually most of them are at work. Only one neighbour (I know her mother) has phoned to offer her help, but no one else. I am actually taking this as a compliment and can only assume they think we are in our 50s where as we are in our 70s!

Once bitten, twice shy.

Not overly friendly where I am, though with some I'd rather have it that way.