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Does anyone live in unsociable neighbourhood

(66 Posts)
Oldernewgranny Sun 19-Apr-20 10:17:13

The area I live in has been socially distancing for years!! Over the years neighbours have fallen out for different reasons over building work, selfish bonfires, parking issues to name but a few.
I consider myself to be very sociable, friendly and considerate but even in these challenging times people still don’t speak to each other.
I’m really envious of people organising dancing, quizzes, celebrations, albeit at a distance. I just wondered if anyone else is surrounded by people who have a superior attitude and think they’re better than everyone else.

Sparklefizz Sun 19-Apr-20 10:21:00

My neighbours don't think they're superior (I don't think they are like that) but they pretty much keep to themselves, and few of them come out to clap for carers on Thursdays. They are not organising anything social, and .... to quote Meghan Markle ... "No one has asked if I'm ok" grin

Eglantine21 Sun 19-Apr-20 10:21:24

A bit different but we moved fed into a cul de sac of 10 houses last year. Most of them occupied by people who bought them 30 odd years ago.

At Christmas we held an open house thingy and invited everyone in the cul de sac.

What we hadn’t realised was that over the years they had all fallen out with each other in one way or another.

Never again😬

crazyH Sun 19-Apr-20 10:26:00

My neighbours are ok, no fall-outs or anything, but are not inclined to want to spend time together. For eg: I would have loved to have a street party, for H&M's wedding , but no one was interested, bearing in mind most of them have lived in this culdesac for over 30 years. I'm the Newbie.
But, to be fair, everyone (bar one couple) go out on a Thursday to clap for the NHS. That's something I suppose.

TrendyNannie6 Sun 19-Apr-20 10:33:13

Much the same where I live, everyone keeps themselves to themselves, been here 20 years 18 houses but only know 4 neighbours to speak to, no fall outs as far as I know, I’m fine with that, it’s not a problem,

Oldwoman70 Sun 19-Apr-20 10:36:53

I have been self isolating for 4 weeks guess how many of my neighbours have contacted me to ask if I need anything or if I am OK? (They are younger than me and can often be seen leaving the house to go shopping). These are people who would regularly come to our house when DH was alive to attend one of his famous BBQs. On Thursdays I am the only one out clapping for the NHS,

glammanana Sun 19-Apr-20 11:13:13

I live in a small cul de sac of bungalows and will have been here 3 yrs this October coming,the first spring we where here my husband did hanging baskets for all the neighbours,we where the only married couple living here all the rest where widows or widowers and older than us they are all friendly but are unable to help with isolation however when my husband died in December they all came to their front doors to pay their respects on the day he was laid to rest .

boheminan Sun 19-Apr-20 13:53:41

Much the same as you Oldwoman70. I feel disappointed that neither side neighbours (in their 30's) or anyone in my street come to that, have asked if we'd like help, even though they know we're at high risk. So to answer OP, yes, I live in an unsociable neighbourhood

MissAdventure Sun 19-Apr-20 14:01:56

I live in a block of six flats, and we are all friendly and help eachother out. (Well, five out of the six) smile

yorkie20 Sun 19-Apr-20 14:03:15

Where I live folks are always watching each other and to each others faces as nice as pie but the back biting is terrible.
If you want to be left alone they will leave you alone but they soon have to make comments about everything you do and all within your hearing. They just dont 'get' why you dont want to chat and gossip. We are not all interested in gossip and pulling people to pieces just because they like it.
Some of us actually like our own company. Yes you can call me anti social but thats MY choice.

Floradora9 Sun 19-Apr-20 14:16:59

I am the same nobody knocking on our door asking if we need help . Next door there are 2 adults and 4 teenagers nobody working and their garden is a tip . A neighbour used to say this was the best cul-de-sac in our town .It only takes one family to ruin it . Mind you the nice neighbours have no offered either.

yorkie20 Sun 19-Apr-20 14:19:19

In answer to sparklefizz...I dont think Im superior in any way but my neighbours certainly think they are and because I bumble along in my own way and time they look down on me as I dont want or need to compete in any way with them. I love holidays and I enjoy chatting whilst Im away but Im basically very shy and quiet.

Puzzler61 Sun 19-Apr-20 14:32:34

In the dozen or so houses around me there is only one 70+ aged lady living alone. I have been to her door weekly to ask if I can get anything for her and apart from a couple of things the first time, she has declined since. I gave her my phone number too if she wanted to chat, and feel I cannot force myself on her more. She hasn’t rung so I think I will just back off. It makes me feel a bit pushy when she doesn’t respond. I know she has a daughter who lives about 20 miles away so perhaps daughter is organising groceries, medicines etc. I think she is a person who likes to “keep herself to herself”.

blossom14 Sun 19-Apr-20 14:52:38

Three offers of help from teenagers through the door and texted them all back with thanks and keeping their details. Younger neighbours with families and opposite have all offered help.
We have a long road of over 100 houses, the majority clap on Thursdays.
We have a covid 19 village page on Facebook. So, yes I would say we live in a sociable community.

lemongrove Sun 19-Apr-20 15:20:33

Quite sociable... we send each other Christmas cards, have a get together [bring a plate of something and a bottle] for new year and know each other by name.Sometimes have a few neighbours in for a coffee, and they do the same.All older people, ranging from 50 to 90, mostly married couples.
between times, a bit of conversation if we are in the garden and see them, otherwise we know they are there and would help if needed.

AGAA4 Sun 19-Apr-20 15:39:59

I live in a block of ten flats. Most of us are in our 70s or 80s but the younger ones have offered to help with shopping. As one is a busy nurse I certainly wouldn't want to ask her as she is out on long shifts and I think she has enough to do.

EllanVannin Sun 19-Apr-20 15:49:00

Not overly friendly where I am, though with some I'd rather have it that way. grin

Lollin Sun 19-Apr-20 16:12:01

Once bitten, twice shy.

FindingNemo15 Sun 19-Apr-20 16:18:25

Our road of about 20 properties is not unfriendly, but usually most of them are at work. Only one neighbour (I know her mother) has phoned to offer her help, but no one else. I am actually taking this as a compliment and can only assume they think we are in our 50s where as we are in our 70s!

BlueBelle Sun 19-Apr-20 16:19:39

I live on a main toad I know my immediate neighbours to say good morning to and one other lower down again to acknowledge each other
Not a soul has knocked on my door or asked if I need anything. I nodded at one through the window as she toddled off with her shopping bag to our local shop the other day

If it was the other way round I would have asked them all if they needed anything
Very disappointing really

Niobe Sun 19-Apr-20 16:26:08

Our street has about 30 houses of mixed size. There is one older lady living alone and her family look out for her very well. Our neighbour across the road is a childless widower but he is a key worker and goes to work every day so no one needing support.
On Thursdays at 8pm there is a good turnout to clap for all key workers but I know that some streets in the area have a poor turnout.

Pantglas2 Sun 19-Apr-20 16:30:10

Most folks around us are retired and older than us but still mobile and driving- all friendly and helpful as necessary and in fact one has just rung to see if I’d like some rhubarb!

The answer is yes please and she often offers fruit which I jam and give a jar back! Lovely neighbourhood and neighbours.

EllanVannin Sun 19-Apr-20 16:42:02

BlueBelle, I know the feeling. The only time someone's knocked on my door in the past was for help ! Which I duly obliged----for the following 4+years.

I witnessed better friendship when I used to stay in Oz for 3 months at a time. I miss that.

Whitewavemark2 Sun 19-Apr-20 16:48:16

No I don’t, although I am quite an introvert, and don’t initiate any social stuff.

But we’ve had a lot Of notes in the door with offers of help and telephone numbers.

Clapping Thursday has become very social with everyone lingering and chatting to each other.

We exchange Christmas snd birthday cards and we are part of a core group of about 10 and we exchange presents etc.
We also go to the local golf club every Christmas for a meal with lots of singing and excellent food.
The core of 10 plus anyone else who fancies coming goes out every quarter to restaurant or dinner/dance or whatever.
Plus other social events one if us is celebrating.

Actually written down it seems we are very social!!

H1954 Sun 19-Apr-20 16:56:33

The couple who live at the end of our Close are complete a*******s! They are both very good at minding everyone else's business except when it really matters!

If you've get it, they had it first, if you suffer from it they suffer worse, if you're going somewhere new they've been there before! Do you get my drift?

Generally, all the neighbours help each other out in any way they are able but not that couple, they wouldn't help anyone at anytime with anything!

Rant over!