Premature baby advice wanted

NotSpaghetti yes you're absolutely right about the water. But at this stage if she's in the UK she will be supported by the Community Midwifery Team, including breastfeeding support, particularly with such a small/ prem baby. LaLeche League is also extremely good for breastfeeding support and is a free service. But the feeding sounds fine, its just that the parents are shell shocked!

DGD was prem and 5lbs. She was a monster baby in neonatal ICU but obviously not as developed as a 5lb full term baby.
Mums expressed milk (they'd gone home by then), and it was topped up with formula (I assumed special formula). So all the babies were using a bottle, and some bottle and breast.
(I'm a bit of a breast milk obsessive, but I've never heard anyone say not to express)

Chardy, this baby is only 4 days old. There is no indication to express at this early stage for the reasons it has been advised upthread. Lactation as you probably know very well is a biofeedback loop and the right amount of milk is produced for the baby in response to that baby's suckling. At 4 days the milk is generally just coming on. Further along then expressing can be great if it's necessary. Just not at this stage for this baby.

GrannyLaine you are right in an ideal world but sadly lots of local midwifery teams are really stretched.
Two of my grandchildren born in the last 18 months (one first one second baby) were ‘difficult’ feeders. One had been in NICU and tube fed there and the mum had no midwifery support to speak of at home. I think that without La Leche for her and the Independent Lactation Consultant for the other, even with great family support both would have struggled no end.
It does really sound like Dove’s grandchild is doing well though and as you say - the parents are “shell shocked”.

Sometimes we just need to know what’s normal - and often it’s better to hear it from someone outside our immediate family.
Good luck to you all.

I agree NotSpaghetti that support can be patchy, but it IS there and often it's a question of knowing who to contact for support. One of my daughters fed her first with no issues at all, but number 2 and number 3 were problematic and she received a great deal of high quality support. I belong to a local LLL Facebook group and I am in awe of the quality of support they offer

Congratulations on the new baby!

A babymoon might help with this little one. I did it with my younger two and it really helps with getting the milk supply going. Basically, the mum settles comfortably in bed with all she needs around her including a drink, magazines, radio, phone, if she wishes. Dad can look after the house and produce meals and other creature comforts.

Then have the baby very close by and feed her every time she so much as squeaks, even if it’s only 15 minutes since the last feed. In between times, get as much sleep in as possible. After doing this for 48 hours, I found the amount of milk I was producing had increased noticeably and the baby was much more settled.

You can do it any time, not just with a newborn, if you think their appetite has suddenly increased,

There's a charity called Cry-sis which offers advice to parents of crying unsettled babies. www.cry-sis.org.uk The new parents might find it useful.

I don't understand all the concern? Baby is FOUR days old? What is the problem with mum holding and feeding her every two hours or whenever she needs it? what else is mum doing? If she was four months old I could understand why you may be concerned but 4 days? Barely time for milk to come in even. Lack of sleep? after 4 days? Some mums have lack of sleep for 4 years!

Oh goodness I missed 4 days, yes constant feeding until milk comes in. It's exhausting but passes