Done it all, got it all, know it all neighbour

Our neighbours are lovely - except for the couple next door. We have lived by them for 26 long years and they know better than us about everything. Her plants are superior to mine and she can do things better than I can.

A couple of weeks ago my husband snapped when the man's face came over our fence yet again and he shouted at the neighbour. They are not speaking to us now. Bliss!

H1954, your neighbour's conversation is amusing but you're probably right that it's the stress of lockdown that has made her talk so strangely.

Haha. have an ex B in L was like that.thank goodness not seen him for years... i do have 2sheds though..well ones what used to used for coalshed i think years ago, but we use it as a 'shed'.& im not named judith.

H1954, if she had never been like that before, maybe she's having a bit of a mental collapse and not coping well with the lockdown. Yes, have met people like that, the worst one, always bigging herself up, went for the same job interview as me and got the job as she was so much better qualified, no mere MSc like me but she had a PhD - which she had bought online for an American university on the basis of uncompleted work for the first year of a part-time MSc she abandoned as too much effort...! I'd have laughed if it hadn't been for the fact that I'd have liked the job. Very shocked at the way people can be taken in professionally.

I moved into my house 9 mths ago& it needs a total refurb. I have a man next door who likes to tell me the way he would of done the jobs to my house, questions everything. Why did I paint my fence black, his kitchen would be the best in the street cos it cost him a fortune, why do I need a new bathroom as the one I have is only 15 yrs old, etc. I'm unsure if it is because I'm a woman on my own or what, but it's starting to grind. I'm checking every day on him through lockdown, if he needs shopping etc, but it's got to the stage I dread this cos I get the usual 'I wouldn't do it like that'. I just smile and pass myself, go indoors, and mutter away that it's my house to do as I wish lol. I got rid of a man who always told me what to do so I thing this is why it irritates me so much...

Yes - I worked with someone like that. Her children were brilliant, talented, like Luca said - winning Nobel prizes. Then when grandchildren came along it was the same with them. One of her daughters married a pilot and Oh the boasts about the holidays they had taken (can a pilot or flight attendant get cheap flights for family???) Her brother was Head Boy at the private school he went to; that sort of thing. She was also an authority on every illness known to man or woman. She never just saw a doctor it was always the top and most senior consultant. I thought it was a bit sad and that she was basically a huge snob. She was called Mrs Bucket behind her back?

I once had a job selling luxury apartments. Many people would come, just to look around sneer. They would often remark how wonderful and large there own home was. Things like, ‘we would never fit our furniture in this’

I used to say “How lovely, I could fit my whole house just into this sitting room”. A few had the grace to look embarrassed.

Many years ago I had a colleague who’s father was an admiral in the Royal Navy. She would come into work on a Monday exhausted because she had spent the weekend in Paris, or Milan, or you name it. How had she got there? Why her father had arranged a private plane from a small local airport .
On her wedding day, a lovely but quite modest affair for someone so well connected, I was chatting to her dad and it came out that he was in fact an ordinary seaman and the flights and wealthy lifestyle she claimed was all castles in the air. Such a shame that she felt she needed not do this, she was a lovely person without all the bragging.

I have an acquaintance whose eggs always have two yolks! With out fail no matter what is mentioned, he has been there, done it. So much so it’s becoming more difficult not to laugh.

Oh don’t get me started!!?. I find most people I meet are just like this. Maybe that’s why we’ve only ever had a small select group of friends! They’ve seen it, done it, experienced it, twice as bad and for twice as long as anyone else! They’re an authority on everything, and it’s all about them?. So boring!! Thankfully, I’m very discerning, and can now recognise one coming from a long way off! Avoid them at all cost. Not so easy if they’re your neighbours I know. Social distancing is no stranger to me....I’ve been doing it for years!?

My mother. When she was no longer able to travel abroad she would tell everyone who would listen, ‘she did not care as she had aleady been to every country in the world’. She would then list the half a dozen countries she had visited.

Thank you for that Oldwoman. It gave me a good laugh. I have a brother of a similar ilk.

My brother in law was like that. He was a bricky but knew about anything I talked about, Cooking, art, embroidery, history, literature etc., and was one if those people who carried a roll of notes rather than a wallet so you could see how big it was.

I also had a friend who somehow always managed to tell shop assistants and anyone else she could collar about the 3 houses she had.

I know lots of people who have bigger and better but none who brag about it. I do know lots who insist that they have more or worse ailments than others, can't understand wanting to be the most ill.
I have noticed lots of one up-man-ship on gransnet, especially the political threads. One poster in particular seems incapable of original thought and always posts a link to the Guardian to show where her thoughts originate.

Years ago we were friends with another family with children of the same age as ours.

She:- the children were marvelous in the car, there was little traffic on the Autobahn, they were first on the ferry,, millpond crossing, first off.

He:- the kids were utter shits, he nearly dropped them off on the Belgian border, the traffic was horrendous, only just made the ferry, sea-sick everywhere, stuck behind an idiot who'd lost his keys so couldn't get off the ferry for an hour.

We were once being lectured by her in their kitchen about how no processed food, sugar, frozen food every crossed their threshold as he came up from the cellar with a box of Birds Eye burgers ready for the bbq!

The Christmas 'boast by post' was named for her, she never knew that we knew other people who knew where the matrimonial bodies were hidden!

anyone recognise themself? 'shelmiss' said there's one on here!.............remember, you don't have to listen to people like this, change the subject or say 'got to go now! quite easy!

Great thread. I love the term “elevenerife”. We all know a boaster. I’m off to read more comments.

I had an aunt like this. My father would often refer to her as Winnie-Vinegar-Bottle. Bigger, better, been there, done or seen that - or her close friends had.

My mother was once telling me about some friend or acquaintance who had some very rare disease.,

My father at once piped up with, ‘For God’s sake don’t tell Winnie Vinegar Bottle - she’ll know someone who’s had it twice.’ ?

Our nextdoor neighbours do actually have "two sheds", and their home and garden is the best in the street, he is a know it all, he told me two weeks ago that the Corona virus pandemic is over and done with, I just nodded and said "oh good".

I think it is a problem with self esteeme. They have to big themselves up. I have a friend who nevers listens to what you say and always has done the same as you but better. She is very nice but a proper conversation can be difficult.

Hello I have a Son aged 53 who I don’t think will live to see 54. I saw him yesterday for the first time since lockdown and couldn’t believe the weight he has gained. We come from a family who struggle with our weight and he has been fat now for a good while but not like this. His Wife and Daughter are concerned too but no amount of asking for him to do something spurs him on. He knows my Dad had his first stroke at 48 and was dead four years later. His job he hates as it is so stressful so I understand the pressures he is under and point out he got to his pre wedding weight 8 years ago and looked and felt well and happy. Being nice about the problem hasn’t got me anywhere do I tell him he is being so selfish to us all as it stands he is a heart attack waiting to happen. I dread him getting the virus because it loves very overweight people with very HBP. Thanks for reading any ideas folks?

grannyrebel I have loads of friends like that. I call them 70/30 people. They talk for 70% of the time and you get A meagre 30%. I have those who will talk 90%. I try to be charitable if they’re lonely, but it’s hard sometimes.

Shysal. Those awful Christmas round robins. Known in our family as “a boast through the post”.
I used to receive them when newly separated and at least one of my boys Was causing me grief and their children were winning Nobel prizes and marrying crown princes.

I have over the years made a mental note when I know what time of day I can go past a certain neighbours house without her emerging with some complaint which seems to be all this person does with her life .When she will be out walking her dog, when they have their mid day meal I know I will be safe from this issue of 'complaining' which seems to dominate her life.

I find this type of person never wants to hear anything about your life either! I know a few