Would you sell your house & downsize to help your sibling?

You say your brother is hundreds of miles away, but he doesn’t seem to have any ties. If your brother has no job, and no prospect of one where he lives, why can’t he come and stay with you for a while?

Your house is all you have, he’s lost his home and savings. Don’t let the same happen to you.

Mary, I feel for you! A number of years ago, following a serious stroke, DH decided to "help friends get back on their feet" to the tune of nearly five figures! No agreement about repayment was formalised, though they did make a few payments to him while he was around. I asked what would happen if he died and he told me they wouldn't let me down. Well, they have let me down and I am in a financial mess at least temporarily as they consider their debt was to him alone! Over the past year I have had to face possible homelessness and bankruptcy, but our lovely offspring have come to my rescue!
I'm with DotMH on this. I would advise being very, very cautious in a situation like yours. You need proper advice about your sibling's position - what benefits/help with housing is available; whether they are entitled to carry on living there at least until your relative dies, or if the property needs to be sold to pay legal fees; could your convicted relative appeal on health grounds that a prison sentence is inappropriate; whether any agreement was properly set up and witnessed etc etc. Selling your property to rehome your sibling in this sort of situation has far too many pitfalls for the ordinary person to negotiate and you yourself could end up penniless and homeless.
Best wishes, and please be careful

No....I wouldnt...because my house is not my pension but it will go to my two kids ...one of which although working hard all his life cannot ever afford to get a ‘foot on the ladder’...I feel for him as half his salary goes in private rent. My daughter is well set up. But my house will go 50/50 to them. Sorry but your sibling and partner can come live with you ....if they’re unemployed where they live wont matter.

Could you not offer to rent them a place for 6 months... give them the deposit and maybe 6 months rent to help them get on there feet. I wouldn’t sell if it was me.

Doodledog, well said.
My friend works within the field of housing and sometimes, the only obligation of councils will be to give advice, unless a person meets certain, very strict criteria.
Sadly a single person with no vulnerabilities isn't top of many lists!
I'd strongly suggest speaking to someone at Shelter re' the housing situation, they are excellent and have a very good helpline.
If your sibling isn't working, surely it would make sense for them to live with you, despite distance?

No I wouldn’t

You didn't say whether you have discussed this with your sibling. I'm guessing as you are undecided that you haven't mentioned it to them. Would they even want you to hand over part of your pension? Personally, in their shoes,
I would find another way, rather than accepting pension money.
Good luck to you and them.

what a sad situation for your sibling, are there no jobs in the care industry as they have been a carer (even though the jobs I see in care dont require experience). I do agree with other posters regarding your property.

Who was it signed over to and was it done thro solicitor or poa?
Do not sell your house and sit money. You never know how it’ll pan out they might separate or worse leave it to an unrelated offspring.

I do know people who have looked after relatives in return for a roof over their heads and the promise of inheriting the property , only to find that it has to be sold to cover debts, or has to be shared with other family members.
The whole business sounds very dubious, and I think the OP would be very foolish to contemplate selling her house, her only asset, to provide for her sibling, who appears to have no assets, no income and no job prospects.
How will it provide her pension if she is living in it?

No. Your sibling should approach the council for rehoming, and the dwp to claim benefits. Also they could consult with charities line CAB, Age UK, Carers organisations, Shelter etc or whatever the Scottish equivalents are. They should also consider sitting tight in the bungalow until evicted whichbwill make them homeless rather than "intentionally homeless".

As an absolute last resort, send them the train fare to live with you - spunds like they have no jobs so could relocate.

Mary, you sound like a very caring person. Is your sibling asking you to sell your house to help them? If so then he/she is taking advantage of your caring nature. Offer a temporary stay with you until they’re back on their feet, but don’t sell your home. You say you don’t have any money to spare so there may come a time when you’ll need to downsize to free up some cash for yourself. There may not be work in there field but there are other jobs out there. Many people can’t find employment in their field and have to be content with what’s available to them. I hope your sibling finds a solution to their problem but that’s exactly what it is. Their problem not yours. ?

No, I wouldn't sell up. Can't your sibling stay with you or rent somewhere for now?

No! Just no! Been there, done that, got the T-shirt, seen the film - and the sequel. And it's still NO!

I agree with other posters - their local authorities should be approached for help.

Please, please - NO!

I’m surprised at all the advice to ask the sibling to move in with the OP. I would really struggle with that. I value my privacy and find having people in my personal space very stressful. A sibling for a day or two would be as much as I could bear before feeling resentful.

No absolutely not! You have to think of yourself first, as so many others have said it’s an absolute recipe for disaster!

I wouldn't do it because we don't get on and they would never pay me back. I also wouldn't offer for them to move in as they take no responsibility for their living situation as it is. But your situation is different. Have they asked you to do this? If so, that's a bit cheeky, despite their desperation. They probably should speak to shelter, their local council and try to get some income. Probably a lawyer might have advice but obviously they gave no money.

You also have to consider the legal side of things if any gift or cash asset above £3000 is given away during a tax year. Should you pass away during the next seven years, that gift becomes taxable, and the going rate can be as much as 40%. You really need to take legal advice to not only protect yourself, but also the recepient themselves should you decide to go ahead with this idea.

It's a bit like gambling - only gamble with money that you can afford to lose.

I say - go for it, but only if you can afford it. Whyever not - you might spend the rest of your days wondering if you should've. Of course, this would put them beholden to you. If they can live with that, then I can't see why you shouldn't help them.

In the end, you are just expressing your big, warm-hearted love, your generosity and your compassion: all to be lauded as a wonderful example.

No.
I would have my sister come and live with me, though not sure about her dogs!
I currently give her £300 a month towards her mortgage to stop her becoming homeless, and think that this is a permanent commitment, but I would not sell my home.

Sorry, but no I wouldn't.
They may well be a sibling that has fallen onto hard times but quite honestly, they are not your responsibility.
I think that you would be more help if possible, that you maybe offered a temporary home with you on the understanding that they pay rent and follow rules, just as if they were your lodger and also making sure that they get all the outside help possible that will be available to them from various agencies.
You have worked hard for what you have and don't let guilt trip you into making decisions that you may well regret in the future - you won't be thanked !

Please don’t sell your house, you might end up being homeless. Give them all the practical help you can, even have them to stay as a temporary measure - even if they live at the other end of the country, if they have no jobs and no home, they are obviously not tied to one spot. If you can lend them the odd bit of cash, that would be helpful, but they need to stand on their own feet. They are not your responsibility.

A thousand times no. Point her/him in the direction of help. You can help with form filling, information gathering, etc so they can get their independence. Making such a hugely generous gesture on your part of selling your house would probably end up with feelings of resentment if your sibling made decisions you didn’t like. If you aren’t in a position to assist with a deposit, then I don’t think you have enough money to cushion you in retirement especially if you divide your assets in half.
Another way you could raise the money to provide funds for deposits could be Crowd Funding. You can also find charities who will give grants to people who have specific needs.

I would have to say no.
The 'safe little home' you envisage for them may not be what they want at all - in the long term.

You don't say if your sibling is in a relationship but as you refer to 'them' I assume this is the case.

What if your sibling and their partner/spouse separate in the future and the home you sourced for them has to be sold and the proceeds shared between them? How would you feel about that?
What if your sibling passed away and her partner met someone else? Would you be happy if they then split up and the house had to be shared with a person unrelated to you?

Far too many unforseen outcomes.

Help them financially if you can but definitely not by selling your home.

No no and no. Plenty of other ideas here.