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Will you go to family at Christmas?

(250 Posts)
kircubbin2000 Tue 24-Nov-20 20:35:44

My son has invited me and my ex for Boxing day.After being in the house since March I don't feel happy about meeting 6 other people indoors and probably getting a lift with one of them. Ex is not happy either but he always gives in.
Are you happy to mix households now before the virus has gone?

Teacheranne Tue 24-Nov-20 22:47:15

Yes, I will be going to my sisters house ( she is my support bubble) where my daughter and brother ( together with his household) will join us. That’s three households totalling 8 or 10 people. My sister has a very large lounge so we won’t need to sit close together and we plan to keep some windows open.

I am not vulnerable, am 64 years old, live alone and rarely leave the house but weighing up the risks of spending time with my family who are also working from home, on line shopping and not socialising, I feel it will be fine. Under normal circumstances we would have seen each other several times during this pandemic but I have always stuck to the rules, hence this relaxation is very welcome.

However, if rates of infection go up in our area I might still change my mind.

Maggiemaybe Tue 24-Nov-20 22:51:59

We’ll be spending the day itself at our DD’s, just five of us and the baby. We’re all very careful, still doing online shops, going nowhere, so the risks will be small. Our other AC have children at school so we’re not planning any other get-togethers, apart from meeting up in smaller groups for walks (and there’s talk of mulled wine in the park smile).

suziewoozie Tue 24-Nov-20 22:53:06

ElaineI

We do childcare for both DDs and DD2 already part of extended family so probably will see them as we already do. All of us are very careful.

You are in two childcare bubbles? That’s breaking current laws isn’t it?

geekesse Tue 24-Nov-20 22:53:35

I have five children, and I’m not going to choose between them. Besides, the traffic during that 5-day period is going to be monstrous. I plan to stay home on my own with Christmas TV, a good boxed set, champagne, smoked salmon, and a tin of Quality Street. I’m quite looking forward to it.

FlexibleFriend Tue 24-Nov-20 22:57:17

I'll just be staying home and seeing the same people I've seen every day since February.

petra Tue 24-Nov-20 22:58:57

I've seen my daughter and Grandchildren all through this so Xmas willl be no different.

MayBee70 Tue 24-Nov-20 23:01:14

DD lives 5 minutes drive away. DS 20 minutes. I haven’t been in either of their houses for over 9 months. They haven’t been in mine. I haven’t even met them in gardens. I won’t be spending Christmas with them. I’m dreading seeing the infection/death rate we will have in January/February.

hondagirl Wed 25-Nov-20 05:35:41

tanith

I will have Christmas lunch with my daughter but If I stay once her grown up children arrive in the late afternoon it will be 4 households if I leave it will be 3 so within the rule. So I will have lunch, leave my Secret Santa gift with my daughter and drive home before they arrive. That means all the siblings and their children can see each other and their Mum it also means I’ll be alone for the rest of the day but so be it.

Tanith, this is not strictly within the rules asI understand them. It is 3 households meeting and these have to stay the same 3 throughout the five days, so adding in a 4th is against the rules.

rosie1959 Wed 25-Nov-20 06:17:33

hondagirl

tanith

I will have Christmas lunch with my daughter but If I stay once her grown up children arrive in the late afternoon it will be 4 households if I leave it will be 3 so within the rule. So I will have lunch, leave my Secret Santa gift with my daughter and drive home before they arrive. That means all the siblings and their children can see each other and their Mum it also means I’ll be alone for the rest of the day but so be it.

Tanith, this is not strictly within the rules asI understand them. It is 3 households meeting and these have to stay the same 3 throughout the five days, so adding in a 4th is against the rules.

Not necessarily so if Tanith is already in a support bubble with her daughter they then I believe count as a single household

vegansrock Wed 25-Nov-20 07:09:55

The restrictions are too complex for people to get their heads round- you can meet family A on Christmas Eve, family B on Christmas Day , but no more as that will be your 3 households, but A and B shouldn’t meet another household as they've already been in your Christmas bubble, which has 3 households, so if family A wanted to meet another family on Christmas day they shouldn’t. Can’t see that working somehow.

tanith Wed 25-Nov-20 07:14:46

rosie1959 that is how I worked it out too thanks for confirming my thoughts.

TerriBull Wed 25-Nov-20 07:55:52

Whilst they have over egged their projections at times, I can quite believe SAGE's assertion that the permissible interaction between several households could well spark a 3rd wave. Under the circumstances, and given most of us have tried to be careful most of the year, it hardly seems worth it imo, particularly as the vaccine is now on the horizon. I'm quite happy to have a quiet Christmas just the two of us, the whole razzamatazz that accompanies the never ending Christmas build up gets on my wick anyway. I'm sure we'll get together with family in a limited way, maybe outside for a walk, if it's not too cold, but certainly not over the usual meals we would normally have together. Roll on 2021 when hopefully we'll be over the worst, why jeopardise that for 2 days!

Humbertbear Wed 25-Nov-20 08:10:13

My husband has been told to shield but my 100 year old mother lives near us and on her own as does my widowed sister. We are already in a three household care bubble so that will be that for us. It means we can’t see our DS and GC or our friends. It would hardly be worth throwing away our safety at this late stage when we have already given up so much.

Curlywhirly Wed 25-Nov-20 08:18:25

Curlywhirly

Not sure of the logistics yet, but will definitely be getting together with family on Christmas Day.

Should have added - we are in a childcare bubble with our grandchildren, so getting together for Christmas Day (not sure whether at our house of theirs) won't be a problem.

kittylester Wed 25-Nov-20 08:23:51

LauraNorder

This Tory would have liked a tough line from her government saying that we must put Christmas on hold this year, keep to space, face and hand washing, get the r down and then get vaccinated as soon as it’s available. Okay some will break the rules but the vast majority would be grateful for a tough stance.

This Tory too Laura.

We will see DS1 otherwise he would be on his own.

But, watch out for the party asap after!

Daisymae Wed 25-Nov-20 08:29:41

It seems madness to me to fuel a possible 3rd wave in January. We hope to get together at Easter in a more relaxed frame of mind. Our grand children are in their teens, husband is extremely vulnerable so it just doesn't seem to be worth it. It's a decision everyone must make, but the virus is well seeded in the population at the moment. Let's wait for the vaccination.

Ellianne Wed 25-Nov-20 08:30:00

* vegansrock* you're right the rules are jolly complex!
I have no intention of flouting any rule but could we form a childcare support group with our DD1 today, then that would count as only one bubble for Christmas to which we could add two more, DD2 family and DS family?

M0nica Wed 25-Nov-20 08:30:16

No, we never go to them, but they come to us for either Christmas or New Year. This year it is meant to be a New Year visit.

Currently we are undecided. DH is recovering from a major operation and a visit will make a major contribution to his recovery. We have a big house, meaning big rooms rather than lots of rooms and we can completely isolate the visitors. Separate staircase to their self contained bedrooms and bathroom, which contains the only loo they will use. No touching DH or me, plenty of space to socially distance. They will also not be coming down until 10 days after the schools close.

We haven't made a final decision. That probably will be in a Zoom call a week before Christmas. I am sending all presents up to them so as not to predetermine the decision.

Iam64 Wed 25-Nov-20 08:34:31

I don't think the regulations/advice/whatever it is are too complicated for people to understand. It's simple, three families only. Not three families who have or will continue to see other people. For so many of us, this is a non starter. Children will have been in school till a week before, unless parents all work from home they'll have mixed with other people.
Even those of us with priority delivery slots can't get food, so will have to brave the supermarket. That's one of the places the medics identify as covid connectors.
I agree with LauraNorder , though not a tory I'd have been much happier with a government that advised people to continue to act as though tier 3 regs applied. Yes, some people would have refused to be sensible but it would have given many families much simpler and less emotional plans

sodapop Wed 25-Nov-20 08:38:32

Wish we could be with family at Christmas but like many others we have not seen them for over a year now. I just hope people will balance the risks and be sensible.
I agree with Suziewoozie the media and Government have overplayed this entire Christmas thing.

Lucretzia Wed 25-Nov-20 08:41:27

I think we're seeing people who are not likely to meet up over Christmas.

The awful Piers Morgan is running a survey about it all 75% won't be meeting up over Christmas

But I feel that this is all very similar to people who voted for Boris and Brexit.

They're not saying a word

I think the silent majority will end up having a Christmas of sorts with family.

Maybe any over 80s will stop at home but apart from that many of us will be having a Christmas meal with the family

Just ask any supermarket how their Christmas Party food orders are going

Iam64 Wed 25-Nov-20 08:47:52

Lucretzia - I'm sure you're right. That we oldies will continue to be cautious. Younger people who are less likely to be very ill or die if they get the virus will mix with family and friends as though the virus doesn't exist.

Lucretzia Wed 25-Nov-20 08:49:08

They will, Iam64

Let's hope they don't pay a visit to Grandma for a while

Sarnia Wed 25-Nov-20 09:11:10

This has opened a can of worms. I live with my youngest daughter and her family. We have kept to the rules both inside and outside the home. This throwing caution to the winds for Christmas has caused a dilemma. My eldest daughter is thrilled to think she can come here with her partner, her 2 daughters, one bringing a boyfriend ( 2 bubbles) and stay for a couple of days. I haven't seen or hugged them since January when we had a family 21st celebration and I am so longing to do that BUT I am concerned. At 72 with a heart condition I would feel happier leaving a get together until Easter. By then the vaccine should be underway and better weather would mean we could meet outside. Voicing this opinion will make me look like Scrooge. I feel I can't win.

M0nica Wed 25-Nov-20 09:13:19

I think the other consideration is what the COVID rate in your area is. We live in an area where the COVID rate has always been low. The probability of meeting the virus is very low indeed and there have been no deaths in the area from the virus since July

If we, or our children lived in a higher tier level then things would be different. if we lived in a top tier area the shutters would be down and locked.