More to life? But what?

Msida you have taken the words right out of my mouth. Before Covid, and in spite of all you said ringing so true, I was living a very contented life and was very happy teaching my tai chi classes and seeing friends and family occasionally. But I'm in my 80th year now and I feel that the best of what I had left has been stolen from me by Covid. Is this all there is now?

Msida

I can understand that you don't want to plod along in a bungalow I hate bungalows and they scream out Old people..

But

I'm going to speak from my heart and hope you do not get offended

You say you are grateful.. You say the words.. But I don't think that you are grateful..

For eg your 70 and still have a loving husband near by... Stop just for a minute and really think what your life would be like without him..
Really think though of what your day would be like without him.

Think it through, dinnertime alone, wake up in the morning alone have breakfast alone. No one to share anything with or to talk to if your having a bad day..

I'll have my children I hear you say,, think again, they are busy getting on with their own lives and although you will get a phone call here and there and even a visit, the majority of time you will be alone and that feeling of being alone will consume you

If I could have my husband back I would be happy to li e in a cardboard box with him

Sometimes happiness is under our nose

Well said Msida, some people never realise how lucky they are and are never satisfied, my husband passed away in April this year age 66, we loved life never been ill all our lives, 44 years married, our children are lovely and considerate, joining me in their lives, but sadly I'm still very lonely and would give anything to have him back ;(

Eskay10
roughing it Yes, if you have to make your bed before you can make a cup of tea and use a porta loo, I agree with you.
But if you don't want to go without your home comforts you have to step up to a larger vehicle. One where you get a proper toilet with an electric flush and a full size shower.
And then go the whole hog ( like us) and tow a smart car behind.

Petra - thank you for the info.

I have always had itchy feet and the only thing I have ever wanted to do is travel. Post retirement and before Covid DH and I were able to do some long-haul travel, though not as much as I would have liked as DH has an irrational fear of running out of money and is terrified of spending! I now just feel I am marking time and resenting being stuck here, particularly as DC are both abroad. Roll on vaccination!

I've lived in a bungalow since 1983.

lovingit I’m so pleased that you are having fun, I wondered how you were getting on.

I too had the same feeling as my 70th approached I was ,healthy ,solvent,family fine,lots of friends a horse and a dog so a really comfortable RUT!

18 months later I,m writing this from beachfront apartment in Spain listening to the sea with my dog asleep on the sofa.

Of course this was arranged pre virus so it,s very different from what I had planned but I am certainly out of my rut.I didn,t know anyone and I did have a wobble 2 weeks in when I wondered if I could cope alone but i am loving it and soaking up every minute as it,s only for 6 months .My son might be able to come at Xmas but New Year and my 70 th will be celebrated on the beach with my dog!

I certainly feel like many of you. I hated becoming 70 and my body has certainly started to tell me about it. I have so many frustrations and now find I resent doing the 'normal jobs' and spend hours on Youtube learning things. I am full of ideas and but don't seem able to focus on anything.

We have good pensions so no financial worries. I retired at 63 and we happily started childcare for grandchildren. My husband took early retirement and never looked back. We are blessed in many ways and have had good holidays and friendships in the past.

We are now in our early 70s and I desperately want to move having lived in our house for many years but we don't know where to go, stairs are becoming a problem. I would also love a camper van, but hubby not keen. He has your sentiments exactly NotTooOld, and now I'm not sure if we are too old for roughing it. As you say, you can buy a lot of hotel breaks for the cost of the camper van. Life seems to have come to a standstill but DH is always positive that things will turn out well, and most times they do. We are both looking forward to getting fit again, and getting on with what time we have left.

NotTooOld
The uk is not a friendly motohome country. France is going that way. The Spanish have good and bad days ?
Sweden is the most friendly county for motohomers.
Our toilet has a holding tank so we can go a long time before we have to pump out.
We have a rock and roll bed but it's never used as our bed is in the back and can be ajusted for seating in 2 mins. Our television is in that area. That is supplied through a satellite system.

I feel just like you LadyBella. I know I am lucky, I do count my blessings, but I want to do more. I found volunteering a wonderful challenge before Covid. I would deliberately pick things to do that took me slightly outside my comfort zone and forced me to meet new people and learn new skills. I miss those jobs more than I would probably admit to anyone. I used to get up full of purpose every morning and the weeks seemed to fly by. In normal times there is a web site called Do it with local opportunities. Nothing on it at the moment of course.

Sorry - "fiends" should of course, be friends!

At 73 and 71, my husband and I are also planning a significant move - from Rural Lincolnshire to rural North of Scotland! Sadly, we are currently tied up with lots of "legalese" stuff i.e. finding and obtaining Certificates for work done since we bought the Bungalow (we are hoping to buy another one, since hubby cannot manage steps!). We will be literally 700 miles away from family and fiends - but hope to make more. We will have a new area to explore, as we can no longer manage holidays. Hubby has a back injury which means he cannot bend, and he has a 52 inch chest (ex Rugby Player - so not a small man) and cannot fit into a small shower (or climb into one with a 4" high tray). Furniture in Hotels or self catering is another problem. Usually it's much too low down for him to get into or out of! Existing family do not visit anyway, so I'm sure we will be fine. We will probably miss our former Church Community and our local friends, but can keep in touch with them in the same ways that we have already been doing, due to Covid. Yes, It's a risk to make big changes later in life (we all get set in our ways - and we tend to need more medical care) - but Life is for Living. Yes, it's possible and eventually certain that one or other of us will pass away, and the survivor will be left alone. That will be hard, but staying where we are will not change that. If you really want to do something, think it through, certainly - but if you want to try it, Go for it, I say!

I went on a walking holiday last year when I turned 60 to the Amalfi Coast. The age range was 50-80 and we all had a wonderful time. A few people were there as part of a friendship group but there were a lot like me on my own and we had a ball. Great walking and a wonderful week. Whilst I was on my own I wasnt alone and felt safe traveling with a group.

@J52 - my granny also suddenly came alive in her 70s. She didn't travel the world but suddenly started visiting family that she hadn't seen for years, including a sister she had been estranged from for nearly 50 years. It was over 30 years since she had been outside her small Welsh village. She even came to visit me in London with one of her sisters who I had never met and who lived just 20 miles away from me.

Ditto MaidMarion

I do sympathise with people who are on their own. I was widowed when I was quite young and have since remarried. I’m inspired by a friend who has always been single. She travels a great deal. When things are better regarding travel she enjoys coach trips both in the UK and abroad. You’re looked after every step of the way and always have company. There are also companies such as Just You and Solos which she says are very good.

My goodness.... I thought I was the only one who thought like the OP.... yep, I feel JUST he same!!! I have very itchy feet even though I’m 72 .... and hope to do something about it next year ?

kwest I’m afraid I don’t agree at all with your granny, it’s a rather trite saying. People have terrible tragedies in life, how can they choose to be happy undergoing these?

Your Granny sounds very wise, kwest!

A motorhome sounds fabulous, I would love to try that but my husband is not keen. I feel as if one life is not long enough to try out all the things I would like to do. However I love the life I have, even in the lockdown when I don't go out or see my friends. I like being at home and normally I am just dashing in between each activity. I look forward to having some unhurried time in my two greenhouses and the garden. I do ballet based exercises from Youtube. I am lucky enough to still do a bit of counselling and supervising from home via telephone. My husband spent the first lock-down at home with me and we were together for the longest period in our 52 years of marriage. It was lovely, we both took the trouble to be kind and polite to each other, didn't take each other for granted and it felt like a special and unexpected present. He has worked through the beginning of the second lock-down but if things turn out as expected he should be spending a good part of the winter at home with me. We are not seeing our family this year for Christmas as we all agree that it is better to be safe than sorry and we will have a lovely get together when things feel safe again. For people who think "Is this it?" who could have imagined the year we have just had? We never know what is coming, it has taught us that if nothing else. I totally understand how much more difficult it is for people living and coping on their own, but my Granny used to say that you can be as happy or unhappy as you choose to be.

Littleannie I think your remarks are unfair. The OP says she is not rich, but not poor, so can contemplate a change.
Others have suggested humble coach trips or other trips within the U.K. as well as volunteering etc.
My own cousin has recently bought a second hand motor home which needs quite a lot of work, but that is his lockdown project and gives the family something to look forward to.

Just a word of warning about camper vans. We bought a shiny new one and found there are snags to the owning of campers. Firstly, we discovered that neither of us particularly enjoyed driving it. It is quite different to driving a car! Secondly, in the UK you are not allowed to simply pull into a layby in the countryside or a beach car park for the night, you have to book a place at a campsite - and I could tell you some scary stories about campsites I have visited, especially about the toilet blocks - and remember, not all campsites have toilet blocks anyway. The bed in our van was a 'rock'n'roll' type, which should be avoided at all costs. It required a great deal of effort with a very strong arm to pull it out each evening and then had to be made up from scratch every night with bedding stored in a locker. In the morning you had to do the opposite before you could get to the kettle to make a cup of tea. We had a porta-potti in the van for use at night but we were mostly reliant on campsite toilet blocks or public loos. If you are used to visiting your en-suite bathroom several times a night at home this may bother you. We persevered for two years but in the end decided it was not for us and sold it. What a relief! So I would just say that the idea of taking off on a sunny day on the spur of the moment in your camper van sounds great but the reality may be somewhat different. Think carefully before committing! You can pay for a lot of hotel rooms for the cost of a camper van.

Littleannie
The majority of things in life come at a cost.
Be they financially or at the cost of a relationship .Sitting back and thinking should I shouldn't I gets us no where . I admire anyone who in later life has the means enabling them to follow a dream.

If you enjoy seeing different places why not buy a motor home? .Home NOT a caravan. Although caravans are not quite the same as H and self used to spend holidays in when our children were small they will get you wherever and when ever.