am I being unreasonable

I too agree and, as it’s not proven that the vaccinated don’t transmit the virus, how would he feel if he brought it back to you. I’d be inclined to tell him not to come back or at least go somewhere to self isolate before coming home.

We have no idea why your husband wants to go? Maybe good reasons? If half term, parents may be very pressed. If there is no response and you suspect they are hurt, maybe there is more to this. We have to keep a sense of proportion and common sense. You don’t say whether the family are out and about and exposed, or relatively risk free, same with husband. Many families are making tough choices. I know one who from the outset have gone in and out of their daughter’s house to help with everything including childcare (has husband working from home) throughout whole pandemic. Daughter has severe life shortening and threatening underlying health conditions, had a stroke during last lockdown, both units have shielded from anyone else, but clearly against the earlier rules. But good on them - they have staved off other calamities.

So, your husband is basically going to stay with your AC and GC for a few days. Not needed for childcare, so why is he going in the first place?
We'd all love to go and visit relatives - mine are 20/30 minutes away and haven't seen most of them for a year.
How many times do the words STAY HOME have to be repeated before people actually get the idea?
You are in the right. Don't text your son, ring him and explain. Texts can be ignored and the tale your husband has told him (sorry guys) be a mumbled incorrect one, no doubt.
I guess you could always put OH into quarantine when he returns !

Maggiemaybe- read your links, OP's family don't appear to be in any of those support categories though.

Which part of the fact that we are in lockdown does your family not understand and why does not apply to them? I am sure if the visit went ahead and the matter was reported to the police you could and should be fined. Your son should know better and stop the visit.

*meant I read your links

So you know that the OP’s family doesn’t include a child under 5 with disabilities, or a baby under 12 months old on 2 December 2020?

How, exactly?

Stick to your guns frue, you know you’re right. We are all missing family and friends but why put yourselves at risk when (hopefully) the end is in sight.

From my experience, it seems that men are more likely to bend the rules than women. I wonder why this is? You really shouldn’t go, and your husband should understand this.

Half-term is not the same week throughout the country, Nannan2. It is where I live.

I agree with Jan43 & think of those in the 2nd world war. My sisters MIL had a baby & lived for 5yrs being told her husband was missing in action. He was actually captured as a Japanese prisoner. He did eventually return weighing 6st & having been tortured beyond description.

Surely we can abide by the rules for a while longer....this WILL improve (even if we have to live with the virus for many years/forever?) People are still dying...have a thought for those poor families or those having to live with Long Covid .... PLEASE....even if you have had your vaccine!!! Things cant improve until the numbers decrease even after vaccinations.

You’re quite right in not going. It’s not “local”, and as others say, if stopped by police, or reported by your children’s neighbours, your husband could be fined. I haven’t seen my one and only grandchild at all. He was born last June, and I don’t expect to see him in all probability until he’s walking! It’s more important to not just stay safe, but keep others safe, and that means staying home. For me that’s staying within a radius of 3 miles of my home - and only went that far to get my first Covid jab!

I’ve never understood how otherwise intelligent people say it’s all right because we’re in a bubble. Some bubbles, where no-one is with anyone except their bubble and who don’t go out, may well be ok. I know bubbles though where the adults are working and the children in school - how could this possibly be safe for the granny - it may be ‘allowed’ but is it safe? I’m an example of this - I live alone and could have bubbled legally with my son’s family. However, he’s a doctor, she’s a nurse and the children go to school. Much as I would have loved to bubble with them, my chance of contracting Covid from one of them would have been too high to risk! We miss each other dreadfully but I hope to be around for a few more years to enjoy family days and make up for this ‘lost time’.

I like SusieWoosie’s comment. A lot would depend on the personalities and relationships on whether that would work or cause ill-feeling.

What I would suggest though is to tell your husband that you are feeling anxious about catching Covid and suggest that, when he returns, you must socially isolate within your house. That would mean separate bedrooms, cutlery, crockery etc. It is quite a performance and you can look it up online. Maybe he would change his mind?

Good post, Marjgran. But you’re on a hiding to nothing on here, trying to show the other side of the coin.

Yes you need to ring your son.Tell him its not happening and he must take back the invite..(are you sure your sons not asked him to look after the kids in half term so they(the parents) can continue to work without having to stop & see to kids?) In which case, i guess they could argue, its childcare.But it still seems like a very long way to go to give it, especially if the parents can maybe take turns to take care of kids, whilst other works.

Its very difficult when you want to see family but can't.
I have refused to see my dd and grandchildren because dd can't seem to grasp the idea that she shouldn't be taking the kids to visit her friends....
They were meant to be my bubble fgs ?
Im a single person living alone.
Stick to your guns and make him pay his own fine if he's caught!

He’s wrong you are right you shouldn’t feel bad about this. We’re in this mess because so many just do what they want. Smile and be firm.

It is your husband and son that are being unreasonable and it’s things like this trip that mean we are still in lockdown.

I think sometimes we could all become nervous wrecks over this sort of thing if we allowed ourselves to be. This morning's papers suggest this lock-down could go on into the Autumn. I have not seen my daughter since last September when we managed a short family break which luckily fitted into the short time that we had any freedom although the rule of six came into being the night before we arrived there. Our son and his family were also going and they had a separate house so we did not break the rules but we could not have our usual family meals together. My heart dropped when I read this morning's paper. We are all hoping that in September we can have our annual break but now it is looking doubtful. I am disappointed but so long as we all stay healthy that is all that really matters. I have friends who live alone and for them it must seem never ending. I have another friend who's first grandchild is due in eight weeks time. This child is the precious result of IVF after many lost pregnancies. If I was in my friend's shoes, I could not honestly say that I would not visit that new baby. Providing that I tested Covid free. My friend was going to be a birthing partner for her daughter but Covid has put paid to that. It must be heart-breaking not to hold your first grandchild in those early days.

Maggiemaybe- and you dont know that they do either- (am sure OP would have said if there were extenuating circumstances that they need help with?) In any case there is still 2 parents to share the load if that were their situation.You're just being snide to prove your point as you have in other past posts.

As long as people break the rules because their own situation is heartbreaking, they are playing a part in causing heartbreak for other families, because the restrictions will need to continue.

Surely you and your husband can't be in a bubble with your son and family. My understanding of a "bubble" involves only a person living on their own being allowed to meet indoors, stay over. Would check out the rules but I know I and DH aren't allowed to even visit family.

Well obviously your husband is going against gov advice but you know that. I think the issue is that none of the family seem to support your decision. It's indeed an uncomfortable position to be in. No easy answer. If you feel you’ve explained your position there’s not much else you can do but grin and bear it. It’s very hard.

thankyou all - was feeling so miserable about this but you cheer me up

It is half term next week! And I want to see my grandchildren, we have been separated for too long.