Are you looking forward to spending one-on-one time with your grandchildren soon?

DS and family are coming down for the Spring half term, providing the unlockdown goes as planned, just after DGD's 14th birthday. We last saw them last August for a distanced day on the beach at Southwold.

DGC have a diary and can tell me exactly how many days until we meet and when we zoomed over Easter, were visibly excited at the prospect.

Thankyou.. Frogsinmygarden. It was nice to read your first post, it's as if you understood what those of us who aren't so lucky are going through, and you worded it so well, that's why I shared my story. X

Ydoc... Thankyou for understanding, it makes me feel less alone when I hear others go through similar. X

Yorkie
I feel so bad for you, reading your post upset me. I have a daughter who for some reason needs to be patted on the back on a daily bases. Is constantly jealous of my love for my gd. Actually jealous of it. I spoilt my daughter and now she is 38 she wishes it to continue. I too have been made ill by it. But I have realised I have to play this stupid game to see my beloved gd. They have the upper hand I'm afraid. It's a deplorable situation one we would never have out our dear mums in. I struggle to understand how they can be so cruel. Wishing you all the best x

I have one granddaughter from one daughter. I am missing my little gd incredibly, it is actually painful. I lost my dear mum, went into depression and my gd was 4 months old. I developed a bond with her, whereby we will just look at each other and we know I don't know how else to put it. She is now 4 I have lost a whole year of her. I ache for her, I try not to get upset but impossible most days. It has not been helped by my d and sil, they are in control and are v controlling. We could have had lots of meetings for walks, Skype, we have hardly done any Skype. But we are at this stage now and I pray for the moment I have alone with her.

BBJS, how lovely!

My only grand grandchild was born in the USA; When I did get to see her she shunned me and as she grew older it got worse. Wouldn't let me touch anything of hers and was even told off by her parents for being rude to me. It broke my heart. Now, after Covid I have grown into a real old lady with silver hair and a stick, and she is now 15, I am the apple of her eye she is so loving and kind to me I am in heaven. Who can ever tell eh ?

We are fortunate to have had our GC staying with us every other week as we are in our daughter's support bubble.
The other weeks the stay with their dad

Yorki

I do understand some of what you are going through and I sympathise. The only thing we can do is hope for either a change of heart (no chance in my case) or keep trying. These ‘children’ of ours are something else, putting it mildly. Like you it has made me ill in the past but now I take things much more pragmatically. Every good wishes Yorki.

I'm in the catagory of the " frogs in the garden " post in here . My daughter has fallen out with me , and does all she can to stop me seeing my grandchildren. It's breaking my heart as I love them to peices, but she ignores my pleas for contact , and if I go and see her she gets really nasty. So I'm always on tenterhooks and it's making me ill.

I am looking forward to seeing two grandchildren and my son who I haven't seen for nine months. It's a year since I've seen my daughter in law as she was pregnant and couldn't make our holiday in the short period our area was out of lockdown. I've missed them all tremendously but I'm not too worried that my relationship with these grandchildren will be adversely affected as we've been in frequent contact and both grandchildren have asked to see us. I am very sad though (massive understatement, annoyed, verging on depressed, and feel this loss is possibly irreparable) that I haven't yet met my youngest granddaughter who will be nearly nine months old when I meet her for the first time. No longer a newborn, a sitting, smiley baby to whom I'm a total stranger, I wonder if I will ever have the strong bond with her that I do with my other six grandchildren. I feel incredibly distraught, bereaved almost, and very emotional about this. Having very good relationships with the other grandchildren, four of whom are local, does not ameliorate the almost physical pain and sense of loss. I'm aware this sounds self indulgent but it's how I feel.

Dutch Doll Thank you. That is so encouraging to hear. I know I have a challenge to face in terms of surgery. But you have put my mind at rest about how adaptable children are to our health and situations. ?

My GC and family will be staying for four days towards the end of the school holidays in self catering accommodation down the road from us. It will be good to see them all after a year of no contact other than through technology. I have a good relationship with my GC and we will do our best to make the most of the time we have with them. But I am increasingly resentful of the other grandparents who not only live nearby - and have been 'in a bubble' with them - are still expecting - and getting - so much more time overall, as well as hosting all the special celebrations like Christmas (we didn't see anybody) and this Easter. We have not fallen out with anyone, but feel this is not fair, and Covid has made the situation much worse. However, we will - as usual - keep our mouths shut!!

We had our 5 year old granddaughter for the day this week as both mum and dad were working plus holiday club was fully booked. It was the first child care we had done for over a year and it was a great day. She said she “ had the best say ever” with us. We played games, went to the park, she helped to cook lunch, made a cake with me, ate ice cream, watered the plants, scared off the pigeon, had a quiet book half hour. It was such good fun, no tantrums but exhausting so my gin and tonic was such a relief! So lucky to have this opportunity.

TRICIAL
My Grandmother had vulval cancer in the mid 1970s. She was born in 1901, so was in her 70s. She had a radical vulvectomy and after about 9 to 12 months was back almost to her pre cancerous self. My Grandad was amazed at how well she recovered.
I'm hoping that you too will make a good recovery from the cancer. Medical expertise has come on in leaps and bounds over the last 40 to 45 years and any operations are now often done with much less invasive treatments. I wish you well and I'm sure that the children will adjust well to any changes in your mobility etc. I totally understand where you're coming from as I had an accident over 10 years ago which resulted in neck surgery. I also am still having treatment for the back problems also caused by the accident.
I had been able to give my grandsons aged 4 and 2 piggybacks up and downstairs but that all changed. The youngest got a balloon for me to play with him instead of a ball. It was his own idea and he encouraged me to be involved but seemed to just know when I couldn't reach any more as i was getting tired, in pain etc. He then chased the balloon for me and helped me to still be involved.
Now 12y 9m he still picks up a 10 pin bowling ball and puts it on the ramp so that I can play 10 pin bowling with my husband, his brother 15 and him. It's amazing how children will adapt to your changed circumstances.
Good luck with everything and take care of yourself! Don't overdo it....... I tell myself that and sometimes even manage to take notice of myself!

Yep we have been booked in for a visit! I just pray nothing changes.

We have no plans to meet with our children or grandchildren until after DH and I have had our 2nd vaccinations. DH is having treatment for cancer and until he's through that and recovered from the effects we'll continue to avoid contact with other people as much as possible. The last thing he needs is for his treatment to be interrupted by any sort of infection.

We have kept in touch with our children and grandchildren via texts, photos and phone calls and they fully understand our situation and it hasn't affected our relationships with them. They usually only visit a couple of times a year anyway as they live so far away. One of our GC was born at the start of the first lockdown and we have only seen him once for a few hours, so he really has no idea who we are, but eventually we will get to know him, it will just take time.

I am very happy for you lucky ones that can meet up with their children and grandchildren but unfortunately both my daughters and my new grandson (born December) are in Australia.
I would dearly to be with them but it is not likely to happen any time soon, thank goodness for ‘WhatsApp’

My granddaughter was born in February last year, in the highlands, so I have only seen her a few times over the year. Her sister is 5. Although we have had lots of photos and videos and FaceTime. But unfortunately I’ve been diagnosed with vulvar cancer recently and am really quite uncomfortable with it. I am managing to cope on a day to day basis with my little routines in the house and short walks with the dogs. But am really worried now about not being as active as I was when I last saw them. I think my son will be a bit shocked by the change. I just can’t jump about and play like I used to. And I really don’t know what I’ll be like after surgery. I am really anxious about lockdown ending and me being a different person!!

I have 4 grandchildren, two who live close by and two who I haven’t seen since September. We have seen the two who live near during the latest lockdown as DH and I have each taken one for a walk and then swapped over. They are 8 and 12 so it’s been good to have chats with them one to one. This week when we could all meet together with their mum (my DD) my GS, the 12 year old complained that he preferred the one to one walks! I find it quite rewarding that he’s still happy to spend time with us! He likes to tell grandpa what to watch on tv, then they spend an hour discussing it!
Looking forward to seeing the other two, although we do feel a bit out of touch with them. They don’t enjoy chatting online much.
I must admit that I really did feel that we’d lost the bond with all of them at one stage, but I think we’re back on track!

I can’t wait for a cuddle with my baby grandson.

It's a bit different for me as they are young adults and will be going back to their jobs soon now. But I am very much looking forward to arranging meetings with them, take them out to lunch etc.
I do wish one of them would have a baby. I long to be a great grandmother. It's lovely to have a baby in the family.

I took 2 of my DGDs out yesterday to a park for a picnic etc. It was lovely but the 7 year old has really changed in the last year and I bitterly regret not looking after her once a week as I had done since she was 9 months old. We’ll never get this time back and it’s beyond precious. I really don’t think I could keep to the rules if there’s another lockdown.

I wish! They are 5000 miles way and I haven't seem them since 2018. I hold out hope for Christmas....maybe....

You bet, have named the day we can hug
Cuddle a nan day.
They only live 500m away , so have seen them if the day was Saturday or Sunday 2 minutes past midnight, any other day detour on way to school, they are 14 and 18. So hug in middle of street in my PJs don't care