Exhausted with entertaining grandchild

I am 72 and my husband and I look after 5 and 3 year old grandchildren on a Monday and Tuesday.
It can be tiring but so rewarding.
It is only 2 days so we have 5 days to ourselves.
During the year we have all 4 (from 2 families) for sleep overs and days out. Ages range from 3-8.
It all passes so quickly.

I adore my DGC (2 and 8m) but yes they are exhausting. I invite DD and GC to stay for a few days, then regret it after 36 hours? DD has a tendency to sit back and let us do all the entertainment!! But I still do it as I am a sucker for punishment. I have them 2 days a week and will make sure we have stuff to to each day, soft play or swimming etc. no shame in saying you are glad to see the back of them until you miss them three days later and want them back?

Peasbottom is right. Don't know why I feel I have to be "the entertainer" every minute grandchild is with us. I didn't with the children, and now I've realised what I'm doing, so I now back-off abit. And Peasbottom is right yes they do actually love some of their own "me time" - give it a go.
But yes, they won't want to be with us forever, so enjoy them while you have them as much as you can. They are wonderful and so are we!!

That's honest, and true for most of us. You are certainly entitled to pick the times and nights. 1 in 7 of us have some kind of estrangement so we would jump at the chance, others find it to exhausting. It is, I agree, and I'm only 62 but I tell myself its more fun than joining a gym. And the love I get in return is immeasurable. Exhausting, yes. Just have activities planned or snuggle on the couch with some shows - mix it up a bit and tell yourself you will probably miss this.

Totally with Peasblossom, giving children the chance to play safely & occupy themselves is a great tool. A sheet draped over chairs, an empty cardboard box & craft things can keep the busiest child occupied. A few teddies & It's a space ship, a school, a hospital with a bit of prompting & encouragement . It's more difficult entertaining them if you're in your home if it's not safe & they're small enough to get themselves into trouble though.
Obviously when he's with his parents I assume they have to do other things as well as entertain him.

I think maybe look at daytime naps - if little ones of this age don't have a nap they can quickly be overstimulated. Sometimes less is more, so set him up to play by himself quietly with you in sight to ensure safety. I think they don't always need playing "with" but just to be free to play and take that play in the direction they choose. CBBC etc etc have some good age-appropriate programmes that you might enjoy watching together and breakfast, morning snack, lunch, afternoon snack can be quite time consuming! I have three grandchildren under 4 that I see regularly as we all live in the same village so I do appreciate how you feel Mamou - it does get easier but look after yourself and only take on what you really feel you can and want to. x

Nothing wrong with a bit of TV to give you all a bit of a break. He could also 'help' you. Give him a little wet sponge and ask him to clean the kitchen cupboard doors. He'll probably love that and will keep him amused for ages!

It's not you, small children are exhausting, infuriating, boring, irritating......... However much we love them, I can only do one session at a time, then need a quiet day at home the next day - maybe this is just too much for you at the moment

Peasblossom, I'm with you. They need to be left to.their own devices a lot of the time. A child rolling about under the table humming is mentally very busy. It is not good for them to be constantly entertained. They need to develop a bit of of independence. It annoys me when I see a child absorbed in some activity disturbed on order to go and do something else. Their concentration flags soon.enough anyway.

I look after my GC about 3 days a week (can vary). It's not all day - around 5 hours. But, the 3 year old is like a kangaroo on speed! He bounces on beds, chairs, me!! It is exhausting.
Having said that, he will sit quietly for his meal/painting/Peppa Pig. He is also allowed 30 mins on the iPad but I save that till he's (inevitably) bumped his head/chin/arm.
He won't sit still for a story atm although he used to. However, he does enjoy cake "decorating" and likes to countdown his fish fingers cooking in the microwave.
Both the GC are hard work (18 month girl less so) but they're not little for long.
I'm enjoying it but, Jeez, I'm exhausted!!

I should add that I agree with PB. If they are playing independently, I let them get on with it. I had a bag of ancient plastic straws and some Jenga blocks out yesterday. The 3 year old was fascinated and quiet for ages as he played with them.
He is also interested in tupperware, my salad spinner and plastic drink mixers.
The little one has a pile of old birthday cards (selected for the animals on the front). She calls them her "books". We do have books but she is fascinated with the cards!

Hi all, when ours were little and it was cold, off to the park we went, flask of soup and bread they loved it,,we even found an old tree to sit on, they loved this adventure.... make the most because as others have said when they are teenagers,,,well enough said.. Everything passes.
Enjoy them NOW.

I envy you. Some of us aren't that lucky. Enjoy

I understand completely how Mamou feels. All the activities suggested are useful if Mamou has the energy! Even when a child is fully occupied it is very tiring as we get older , then there us the tidying up !
I started grandma duty 18 years ago - just one day a week. My yougest GC is now three and I tire much more easily now. Moaou , you are having your GC for prolonged periods of time and you have told us he is hyperactive and hypersensitive!! Please be honest with yourself and your daughter and tell her you can no longer carry on with the responsibility and need to cut down / stop altogether . Perhaps offer to baby sit in the evenings and be available for emergencies. Time to think of yourself now!

Our 2.5 year old DGS and his parents live with us at the moment. One thing he loves is “helping” with jobs in the house. It’s very bonding and gives us lots to talk about. He’s better at taking wet things out of the washing machine than I am as he’s at the right level. He can empty the whole dishwasher fairly safely now, and he likes knowing where everything goes. Pairing up socks is very useful!
I’m constantly amazed by how tiring it is being two. If I were charging around all day keeping up a stream of conversation at the top of my voice I’d need to be in bed by 7.30 too!

I look after my 4 year old and 18months old 2 afternoons a week and that is enough for me as they are both on the go from start to finish. I am exhausted after they go home and always relish the weekends to myself which didn't go down well with their parents but that's another story?.

Totally exhausted by looking after a 5 and 3 year old but i think it gets better as they get older. I do leave them to play by themselves. DGD (oldest) has a clock thing in her room that shows the moon and gradually moves to the sun - she knows she has to entertain herself until the sun comes up. DD sets the time the sun rises so it's not 05.30!!

This post is hilarious and sound so much like us ?

I am being given a break from duties at the moment I'm not quite sure how I feel about it it but like I said to them the parents must take the lead

Interesting to read these comments. Wet Easter hols. beginning. DGD 10 and DGS 8. Not so many toys now but DGS does like our Lego and DGD reads/colours. We have quite a few board/card games they like to play but DGS is very competitive and likes to win. If things aren’t going his way he will sometimes have a melt down and even hit his sister. Ideas for coping and amusing them otherwise please?

This makes me sad. Two GS in Australia so no chance.
2 GC here ahead 7 and 4 and I’ve ( just me !) had them stay for 3-5 days in holidays since they were little and loved it even though it’s obviously exhausting. Now I have my diagnosis this may never happen again.

Lucca

This makes me sad. Two GS in Australia so no chance.
2 GC here ahead 7 and 4 and I’ve ( just me !) had them stay for 3-5 days in holidays since they were little and loved it even though it’s obviously exhausting. Now I have my diagnosis this may never happen again.

Lucca I noticed you mentioned this diagnosis on another thread recently. I very rarely comment on threads but I wanted to send love and strength to you and hope you get to cuddle those beautiful grandchildren as much as you can. Grandchildren’s love is so simple and uncomplicated and a cuddle always manages to soothe my soul. I hope it does for you. ?

Pls correct me if I'm posting on the wrong place, I'm totally new here and unsure what to do.
The advice I'm looking for is as follows..
I had my son at 16 I'm now 36 and his girlfriend is pregnant she's due in July.
He still lives with my husband and myself and she lives with her mother.
I have zero interest in this grandchild and want absolutely nothing to do with it. It may sound harsh but it's how I feel. I have another child who is 5 so I feel I'm still a mother to a young child. My husband and I had not decided we had finished having our own family. He now states " we can't have any more now" how is this fair?
I dont want her and her baby staying in my house.
Everyone else thinks this is fabulous news apart from me.
They have zero plans on getting their own place and I'm sick of picking up the pieces.
I'm 36! I should not be forced into this position.
My head is ready for bursting with it all.
Thanks

Lomond

It would help a lot getting advice if you open your own thread

There are so many things here

1. What do you mean they refuse to get their own place?
Do they expect to live with you and help them with baby?

2. Your husband does not want more kids with you?

Sorry I couldn't work out how to open my own thread.
1. They can't afford their own place at the moment. They both work fulltime but have never been savers. They spend what they get every month in a very lavish lifestyle
They plan to half their time between both parents houses.
I'm in total disagreement with this.
2. We were thinking on having another child next year but now my husband says definitely not as we are now going to be grandparents.
I just feel really unhappy about it all in every aspect.
Everyone seems to think my opinions are harsh.