Question for divorced gransnetters

They’re in the loft with cards etc. and my wedding dress in a suitcase. (I’m still wearing my engagement ring!)

I was throwing out our wedding album when we were clearing out the house when we divorced as I didn't want any photos of a man who belittled and controlled me, who just made my life a real misery. He took the album, I don't know why he even wanted it. Any photos I had of holidays, etc with him in them all went in the bin. We had no children so didn't feel the need to keep anything to do with him.

Left them all with my first husband when I left him and moved back to my hometown, before I divorced him a while later. Told him he could do what he wanted with them but I didn't want them. That was over 40 years ago. We had no children together. I occasionally wish now that I had kept a couple of the photos with just me in them.

I have put mine in a box with related products in the loft for the kids to discover when I kick the bucket.

I gave them to my kids to keep. As I did with photos of them and their Dad.

annsixty

The same dilemma applies to albums of divorced children.
Both of my C have broken marriages and I have albums from both.
They are packed away and I suppose when they clear my house they will do what they want with them.

Same here. They never married but most of my sons photos from his late teens to mid twenties were with his then girlfriend. I treasure my wedding photos even though we went through a very painful divorce. My dad was divorced, something quite shocking back then, and I’d love to have known more about his first marriage and seen photos of it.

I only had one wedding photo. (Smallest wedding in history).
I think I've got it somewhere amongst old photos.

In the heat of the moment, I removed all wedding photos with my ex in them; but other pictures where he's with our sons are still in the album. As he and his wife live 6000 miles away, he is a stranger to our grandchildren. His loss!

Certainly something to be treasured, Grandmabatty as I can attest.

Nannagarra my uncle did this and put photographs on a large sheet of paper with names and dates (where possible) underneath. The oldest go back to late Victorian and early Edwardian times.

Whilst I appreciate the sensitivity of the subject, can I make a plea?
My maternal grandparents separated in the 1930s. I have only a handful of photographs of my GM and possibly one of my GF (behind my DM on her wedding day). It’s a pity as I would love to see more, especially of my GPs’ wedding day.
Just before my father unexpectedly died, at a time when I wasn’t interested in genealogy, he showed me photographs of his ancestors and told me their names. Dutifully I made a record on the reverse; now that information is thoroughly enjoyable and invaluable. No one else in the family has this so they often ask me.
When my DC were young we could see the likeness to their cousins on my DH’s side of the family. Now, as I look at my DG2, I note the resemblance to one of my cousin’s first born which I failed to notice in my paternal ancestors and cannot verify to my son with photographs. Food for thought.

My daughter took mine. It was an album of photographs. Black and white!

I shredded then but kept the video as it shows many family members and friend that are no longer with us.

My wedding photos are in their album which is somewhere in the loft; I don't look at them but never thought of destroying them, just put them out of sight.

H1954 I really don't think my AC and GC will want them to be honest but I will probably hang onto them for a while.

Please don't think that. People change over the years and they may feel very nostalgic once you are gone. Younger folk often show no interest but 20-30 years later it will be a different story. Photos and videos actually improve with age, the longer they are around the more precious they become.

twiglet77

I kept mine, from both failed marriages. They weren’t always bad times.

I’ve kept one or two of mine as well. As you say there were some good times and in any case it’s part of my personal history.

I have however binned a large number of older photos passed down just keeping the most important ones.

I've still got mine. Some of them have come to mean more over the years. Like the one of me and my dad outside the church, never realised how few photos there were of just the two of us. My GS asked recently "Did you get married?" so at least I've got the evidence.

Thank you all for your comments. Working my way through all these photos has been so poignant.......I've smiled, I've laughed and I've cried, it's been a very emotional afternoon.

I really don't think my AC and GC will want them to be honest but I will probably hang onto them for a while.

I have discovered that I had several photos of the same group, event, scene etc so that part was easy......pick the best and dump the rest.

Mine are still in a box in case the children or grandchildren want them, but this thread reminds me that I have lots of other photos I need to sort / throw out.

Mine are probably at the bottom of a wardrobe and I doubt if I will have to throw them out!

Just to add, if any grandchildren or beyond are interested in family history they will want old wedding photos. I would have loved to have wedding photos of my great grandparents!

Only a few photos in an album up in the loft.

All these photos are part of your life story and should be kept for the children who should also remember that. Photos of their mum and dad getting married are part of their life story! That is how they came about. I'm a believer in keeping all these things. They take up no room after all.

Thanks Grandmabatty

Twiceasnice you'll hear no comments from me! I kept the wedding photos with me and other guests and got rid of the ones with me and him.