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Ashamed to show my arms

(130 Posts)
Madwoman11 Sat 18-Feb-23 16:10:22

I'm looking forward to warmer weather but I'm late 60s and my arms are wrinkly and saggy.
I love the sun on my skin but I am genuinely embarrassed by my arms now.

Does anyone else feel the same?

Lovetopaint037 Sun 19-Feb-23 09:22:10

I am in my eighties and feel lucky to be able to go for a walk let alone worry about how my arms look. There is so much that could be wrong that looking my age isn’t one of them. So go forth with a smile and a cheery disposition and no one will care about your arms.

Witzend Sun 19-Feb-23 09:29:28

I’m the same, Germanshepherdsmum. I may be old, but I don’t want to advertise the fact any more than I have to.

Juliet27 Sun 19-Feb-23 09:40:34

Even a slight breeze can move my bingo wings 😱 I daren’t wave goodbye!!

Germanshepherdsmum Sun 19-Feb-23 09:42:17

Well said Witzend.

Fleurpepper Sun 19-Feb-23 09:43:35

LOLsometimes does not do it ;)

Shinamae Sun 19-Feb-23 10:04:33

Poppyred

Shinamae

My upper arms are absolutely fine, no bingo wings however, my stomach…🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ (just turned, 70)… hip, measurement, and waist measurement are the same, and have been for years actually…🤷‍♀️

I don’t believe you.

Come on Poppyred, you have called me a liar on an open thread I would like an explanation please?

Farzanah Sun 19-Feb-23 10:06:22

Witzend

I’m the same, Germanshepherdsmum. I may be old, but I don’t want to advertise the fact any more than I have to.

What’s wrong with being old??

Fleurpepper Sun 19-Feb-23 10:16:03

Nought wrong- but on the other hand, I do not wish to parade the wobbly bits to all and sundry. A bit of clever disguising does not go amiss.

M0nica Sun 19-Feb-23 16:48:24

If you are old it is evident no matter how little or how much you display.

I think all this obsession with how our bodies look is ridiculous. We are as we are. All that is in our power is to look after our selves so we look and are as healthy as possible for us. The rest is froth in the wind.

What is your preference, alive with bingo wings or dead and ashes. I know which I prefer.

Norah Sun 19-Feb-23 17:47:20

Fleurpepper

Nought wrong- but on the other hand, I do not wish to parade the wobbly bits to all and sundry. A bit of clever disguising does not go amiss.

I have no desire to show my wobbly bits outside my home and garden. To that end I wear clothes to my neck (too big bust) and elbow length sleeves (soft arms). Quite clever disguise is well tailored slim clothing.

I also use good facial moisturisers, sun care, exercise, watch my weight assiduously, walk miles daily, eat well. The entire gamut.

AussieGran59 Sun 19-Feb-23 22:05:32

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Glenfinnan Tue 21-Feb-23 14:18:57

I always wear 3/4 sleeve tops and dresses. Pale colours always look ‘summery’!

TopsyIrene06 Tue 21-Feb-23 14:21:21

Juliet27 How true. Together we shall pray for days without wind.

Keeper1 Tue 21-Feb-23 14:28:21

However much time I shave I am going to do what I want bingo wings and all

GrammyGrammy Tue 21-Feb-23 14:29:09

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

misty12 Tue 21-Feb-23 14:29:30

What a great comment !

nexus63 Tue 21-Feb-23 14:31:40

i used to always wear long sleeves as i have bad psoriasis down both arms and hands, i was doing more harm than good as the uv rays are good for my skin, they are really bad at the moment as every winter i get flares up, i hated when people stared and moved away from me as if it was catching. now i just go out in my short sleeves during the summer and if people don't like, that is there problem. don't worry about your arms or hands, it is a natural process, enjoy your short sleeves and have a great summer.

Modompodom Tue 21-Feb-23 14:35:05

I still wear sleeveless dresses and tops, and I am 72. I think my upper arms are pretty much passable, as I worked as a nanny and spent many years pushing prams and pushchairs!!!

Yammy Tue 21-Feb-23 14:36:09

I wear 3/4 length sleeves or at least elbow length. I buy a size bigger t-shirt than I really need somehow they make me look slimmer.
Yes, I am too fat and meant to be on a diet for my health but I still like to look as presentable as possible like GMS and others.
I still have the stick thighs, legs and bottom of a 16-year-old but the stomach is as round as an apple.
I tried just to get some trousers that would fit, I found some at Next. They have a normal waistband and zip at the front but the waistband is just wide elastic at the back. I can wear narrow trousers with no baggy bum and hide the tummy and elastic under a tunic.
I have also invested in a couple of quite long tank tops with v necks which I have actually had compliments about. No care home chic from DH.
I do think hereditary plays a part in your shape as you age, I have got my father's body and I suppose really need a pair of Braces!!!!

Calendargirl Tue 21-Feb-23 14:43:06

I feel my arms are fine, quite trim and reasonably firm.

As for my feet, however….

Hammer toes, thick toenails, just ugly really.

But they walk me about very well, just wish I could wear pretty sandals in the summer.

Fleurpepper Tue 21-Feb-23 14:45:48

M0nica

If you are old it is evident no matter how little or how much you display.

I think all this obsession with how our bodies look is ridiculous. We are as we are. All that is in our power is to look after our selves so we look and are as healthy as possible for us. The rest is froth in the wind.

What is your preference, alive with bingo wings or dead and ashes. I know which I prefer.

Well yes, and yet. I don't enjoy seeing most men with bellies hanging out and builder's bums hanging out myself- so where do you stop? Do you go out with belly out and boobs hanging out? A bit of decorum is fair enough in town, restaurants, etc.

2mason16 Tue 21-Feb-23 14:46:16

Why worry? If you are still here to enjoy the sunshine, holidays, friends and family. Don't let age define you!

Fleurpepper Tue 21-Feb-23 14:51:27

Agreed- but there are limits surely. Out of self-respect and respect for others. As said above, where do you stop - very short skirts, etc.

grandtanteJE65 Tue 21-Feb-23 14:54:38

I am just happy that I was reasonably comfortable with my looks when I was young and it mattered to me.

Like everyone else, I can look in the mirror and regret that the passibly good-looking young woman has been superseded by an uglier version of my grandmother than the lady I remember, but then I take the time to think that my sister died when she was barely 60 and I am now 71.

And I remember that the person we see when we look up and down ourselves, or at our reflection is not the person others see, Generally speaking if we are n ot thinking about our looks, but are displaying interest in what we are doing we look much nicer than when we are posing for photos or looking in the mirror.

Stella14 Tue 21-Feb-23 14:57:14

I have wrinkly, flabby arms and I don’t like them. Although I cringe a little at times, I’ll be damned if I will avoid wearing sleeveless clothes in hot weather when I’ll be much more comfortable wearing them. Why should someone else opinion (and as has already been said, most folk are preoccupied with their own issues anyway) affect me. On your deathbed, you won’t be wishing you hadn’t been seen in that pretty sleeveless dress. These things are trivial. This is the youngest you’ll ever be. Use mindfulness and live your life to the full.