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I need some urgent advice

(123 Posts)
Cabbie21 Thu 27-Apr-23 22:40:52

About what to do immediately after my DH sadly dies this coming night.
Sorry to be blunt. I want to be practical before we reach the inevitable. Please don't join in if you find this upsetting.
I am writing here because everyone else in my family will be asleep when the inevitable happens.

crazyH Fri 28-Apr-23 00:45:45

Oh Cabbie - just saw this - my condolences to you and your family - stay strong flowers

Doodledog Fri 28-Apr-23 01:03:55

I'm very sorry, Cabbie. flowers

Moonwatcher1904 Fri 28-Apr-23 01:26:34

God bless you and your family Cabbie. xx

Wyllow3 Fri 28-Apr-23 01:45:55

Holding you and your family in the Light, Cabbie flowers

sukie Fri 28-Apr-23 02:02:19

Cabbie I'm so sorry for your loss.

FannyCornforth Fri 28-Apr-23 04:18:44

I’m so very, very sorry thanks

nadateturbe Fri 28-Apr-23 04:44:40

So very sorry Cabbie. 💐

Greenfinch Fri 28-Apr-23 04:47:46

My thoughts are with you Cabbie

Foxygloves Fri 28-Apr-23 05:32:27

Sincere sympathy Cabbie - I have been there and send love and thoughts to you. It is a privilege to be with him , to keep that marriage vow and to be able to say that last goodbye
“Go forth upon your journey, Christian soul, in the name of God the Father who created you; in the name of Jesus Christ who suffered for you; in the name of the Holy Spirit who sets us free; May you rest in peace In the love of God. Amen”.

Whiff Fri 28-Apr-23 05:56:51

Cabbie I am so sorry you have lost the love of your life the other half of yourself. The main thing is to make sure you look after yourself. You won't want to eat or drink but you must. You will lose weight it's what I call grief weight loss. Your body reaches to the overwhelming sense of loss. Don't try and be brave for other people if you need to cry, scream,shout or hid a pillow do it. Whatever you need to do for you do it. As it's Friday and bank holiday on Monday lot of practical things are put on hold until Tuesday. Wallow in your grief you need to otherwise you will hurt yourself. I thought 19 years ago I had to be brave I was a fool.

You don't have to see or talk to anyone if you don't want to but I hope you have someone who can just hold you quietly . Next week will be a whirlwind of activity while you sort out all the practical things. But from what you have written over the years I think your darling husband with you would have everything filed ready to be past on to the solicitor and a list of things and people to contact.

It's exhausting and your grief is bone crushing . The next couple of weeks will be a hive of activity then a lull until his funeral. Then a lull again and the realisation that your present and future have died with your other half and you have to face the present and future alone. And it's frightening. Only wish someone had told me all this 19 years ago when my husband died . Grief never ends but neither does the love you had and the love you still have and will forever have for your darling husband the other half of you.

Cabbie take care of yourself as you know he would want you to. I know words don't really mean anything now but my heart goes out to you. 💐

NanaDana Fri 28-Apr-23 05:57:15

May he rest in heavenly peace, Cabbie, and may you be comforted in your loss by precious memories, and by the loving support of family and friends.

Grandmabatty Fri 28-Apr-23 06:05:45

My condolences to you and your family.

karmalady Fri 28-Apr-23 06:13:35

Cabbie, I am so sorry for your loss

A good funeral director took a huge weight off my shoulders, they liase with the hospital

Susan56 Fri 28-Apr-23 06:26:38

I’m so sorry Cabbie💐

Chocolatelovinggran Fri 28-Apr-23 07:09:36

So sorry Cabbie. I hope that you can take comfort from the fact that he was loved in life, and will be missed in death. This is the best legacy any of us can wish for. Be kind to yourself going forward. Best wishes to you.

kittylester Fri 28-Apr-23 07:14:12

Sending my condolences, cabbie flowers

downtoearth Fri 28-Apr-23 07:15:11

I am so sorry for your loss cabbie

Greyduster Fri 28-Apr-23 07:16:12

Cabbie my heartfelt condolences to you. I walked in your shoes last year. I’m sure that you did everything he would have wanted from you at the end. You and your family will have much to do in the coming weeks. Be kind to yourself💐.

mumofmadboys Fri 28-Apr-23 07:17:04

Thinking of you Cabbie x

SunshineSally Fri 28-Apr-23 07:18:40

Thinking of you Cabbie and holding you in my thoughts and prayers. Sending you heartfelt condolences. Be kind to yourself 💐 x

ginny Fri 28-Apr-23 07:22:32

Sorry for your lossflowers

sodapop Fri 28-Apr-23 07:24:31

So sorry to hear about the death of your husband Cabbie he is at peace now, so many people holding you in their thoughts I hope that helps to give you the strength you need in the coming days. God bless you and your family.

HowVeryDareYou2 Fri 28-Apr-23 07:26:46

So sorry for your loss, Cabbie21 flowers

baubles Fri 28-Apr-23 07:27:11

My condolences to you and your family Cabbie. flowers

fancythat Fri 28-Apr-23 07:41:18

Sorry for your loss Cabbie.