Teenage granddaughter shutting herself off from family members

What amber and VS said - her parents have it handled anyway

Yes I asked her age as there are big differences according to her age ?

Just wondered how old she is, big difference between 13 and 16

I meant to add, of course you’ll worry as her Gran, that’s natural

Two of mine who were teens through covid have really been affected by it all and they are pretty robust usually. I think we won’t really know the fall out from this until years later. My advice would be to just write to her, send her a card or text if you have a mobile. She’ll come through all this eventually

Nanoften
I think if you were to ask this question on MumsNet you would get an insight into how many teenagers are suffering because of covid.
I will ask: are her parents monitoring her phone.

Teens usually would prefer to be with their friends rather than their family.

I agree with her parents in just leaving her be. Maybe she has told her parents that she doesn’t want to spend time with wider family so they are happy to leave it.

Try texting her, young people rarely speak on the phone.

How old is your granddaughter Nanoften ?

Our 16 year old GD is similar ,avoids anything with more than a couple of people .Its since covid ,her mental health is fragile to say the least.She has a councellor n school and a mental health worker out of school who calls her at home .
Her problems started because she was terrified of carrying covid home to her mum who is chronically ill.Some days she seems her old self,other times she has complete meltdowns that we all find hard to deal with.
You get scared in case you say or do the worng thing instead of helping.
If its something thats new ,maybe give her a wee bit longer to see it she works through it, if not then seek help

Tough one - and I can understand your anxiety.

Has anyone thought to turn the router off?

If she isn't communicating with anyone she won't notice (and that would be very scary as vocations to silent nunneries are rare) but if she comes steaming out into the world in a panic then that is a different issue. One that should be tackled by parents taking the lead.

I made the mistake of asking an 18 year-old grand-daughter if she wanted to earn some extra cash for a much wanted motor-bike by taking on some easy work nearby. She claimed work would damage her mental health and her Dad cold-shouldered me for months for causing her distress.

Today's teens ain't like their parents. I keep getting told they have endured Covid at the worst possible time in their development.

Good luck, Gran.

Unless she is rude or openly hostile I would let her be. Does she have friends? My granddaughter who lives with us hates family gatherings but enjoys going out with her friends now and again. She also dislikes speaking on the phone to family members but will communicate by text.

Is she interacting ok with her close family like parents and siblings?

Does she have good friends?

Does she have good mental health in general?

If the answer is yes to all three, I wouldn't feel the need to worry. I never force my teens to go anywhere and if I did, they would likely resent me and worse, the people I forced them to visit.
Maybe find other ways to communicate and see her, engage her in her likes and interests. Teenagers often feel alone at family gatherings, too old to play and too young for the adults to include them in conversation. It will pass

I hated most of the family gatherings I was dragged to as a teenager, and stopped going the moment I could.

Maybe it’s just not something she’s interested in at the moment. Young people have a lot on these days!