15 minutes of fame

I do have stage 4 breast cancer that is still stable after 10 years and this is wearing on me as well.

You are special you are a wife a mother a grandparent so you have achieved a lot! Don’t put yourself down raise your head and be proud and look after yourself 💐

You have achieved having children who have then given you grandchildren .Sorry you are feeling low it must be hard fighting the cancer sending you some virtual (((hugs)).

Without being at all bashful - ask yourself what your family will say about you when you are gone. You may feel you haven't done anything special - but I bet they think otherwise!

Dealing with your illness takes heroism and courage which I’m sure is recognised by those who know you. This is in addition to being a good wife, mother and grandmother and making a difference in people’s lives.
I often feel like you do. Some people can be helped by volunteering in some capacity. It’s rewarding.

You are an amazing woman!!! Don't ever doubt that, like many of us you have spent your time making others feel good about themselves - now it's your turn. You are also dealing with your cancer how brave is that !? Make no mistake you are very special - treat yourself to what you fancy , put yourself first . Good luck , be positive and remember what a good mother, and Grandma you are - they have you to thank for being who they are today, now that is definitely special!!!!? 💐💐💐

My childless, or should I say childfree DD once remarked to me that “I had put something back into the world” by having children, an expression I hadn’t heard before.
And that is what you have done!👍

Thank you for your kind words. It helps so much. Just really feeling down and having a “pity party”. I appreciate you all!

You are a mother and grandma, and you all get on, now that is an achievement, and a big one!

I've often reflected that I am a very average person as well, Tricia2, but it doesn't bother me at all. If I am known by close friends and family for being a kind and easy to get along with person, then that is a good legacy in itself! Think about the small influences you have on others, and in by being kind you have helped to created kindness in the world.

I’m like you don’t think I’ve done anything special in my life but last week my eldest son when I said how I felt he said mum you’ve done one thing we all love you for you make the best apple pie in the world nobody makes apple pie like you do oh well that’s better than nothing I suppose 😆😆😆🥹

But you ARE special. You have raised 4 children who are close to you, and therefore have appreciated what you have done for them and hold you in high esteem. You have wonderful grandchildren, who are also close to you and have obviously benefitted from your children's upbringing by being brought up in the same way.

Fame is transient and shallow, loving family memories are held in the hearts forever of those who love you and are passed on to future generations. I know which I would prefer.

My daughter thinks I’m amazing because I produced her 😂

Celieanne86, your apple pie comment really resonated with me - my mum made the best apple pie in the world and we, my three siblings and I, always told her that whenever she made one. Today my dear GS told me my apple pie was "the best ever". Small things that really mean a lot. Hold on to that thought, "Tricia2" if you ever have any doubts about your value in the greater scheme of things.

Sorry if I've derailed the thread a bit...

Well I’m not being very helpful when i am down -so I need to turn my frown upside down! Thank you ladies for your responses and advice.

The phrase was probably invented by Andy Warhol and is "In the future everyone will be famous for 15 miutes". It doesn't mean that everyone will be famous just that fame is fleeting and things move on, and it is nothing special. It's a comment on the culture of our time which values short and fleeting moments over real achievements.
I'd give you instead a quote by the poet Yevteshenko

No people are uninteresting.
Their fate is like the chronicle of planets.

Nothing in them in not particular,
and planet is dissimilar from planet.

And if a man lived in obscurity
making his friends in that obscurity
obscurity is not uninteresting.

To each his world is private
and in that world one excellent minute.

And in that world one tragic minute
These are private.

Enjoy your privacy. Enjoy your family. These are real achievements fleeting fame is nothing.

Most people aren’t special, and many who think they are often aren’t either😉
Don’t worry about it, just enjoy your life.

Reading these replies made me think of the last words of 'Middlemarch'; they are profound, and speak for those of us who feel we do nothing exceptional:

'For the growing good of the world is partly dependent on unhistoric acts; and that things are not so ill with you and me as they might have been, is half owing to the number who lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in unvisited tombs.

I found, and find still, great comfort in these lovely words.

Being an 'average' person is still an achievement - and quite enough. In fact, I'm always surprised by just how many people cope so well with life.

There are so many barriers to leap, challenges to overcome, trials and tests just in everyday existence. Coping with ill health and bringing up a family are far harder than managing '15 minutes of fame' I'm sure.

All of you are so thoughtful to take the time to share your advice, quotes, poems and friendly humor. I’m so grateful for your caring, lovely responses.

LovesBach

Reading these replies made me think of the last words of 'Middlemarch'; they are profound, and speak for those of us who feel we do nothing exceptional:

'For the growing good of the world is partly dependent on unhistoric acts; and that things are not so ill with you and me as they might have been, is half owing to the number who lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in unvisited tombs.

I found, and find still, great comfort in these lovely words.

One of my favourite quotes too. We are all special in our own unique way.

I get exactly where you are coming from.
Having very recently celebrated a big birthday I always look in the Announcements section of the newspaper to see who is a similar age and note they are Head of this, Chair of that, Professor of...... etc, and wonder how 'they' managed to get to Uni, when it just wasn't an option for me after A levels.
Ahh, but I think, are they as happy and content as I am with my lovely life and family

Tricia2. Firstly, you are special. A mother, wife and grandmother. That’s a great achievement in itself.
I’m sure most of us feel that every one else appears to have so much more going on in their lives, leaving us feeling that we’ve somehow underachieved. I know I do at times!
I think with your ongoing health issues, you’re doing amazingly well. 🌻🌻🌻