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Huge dilemma - help please.

(76 Posts)
kittylester Sat 03-Feb-24 12:57:22

For Christmas, DB1 gave dh and I John Lewis gift vouchers. The attached cards said £25 on each card.

I have another brother to whom DB1 is much closer (thank you mum!)

Just been to JL and spent £78 pounds. The assistant kept one gift card as it was fully used and and gave me back the other saying '£72 left on there'.

I am assuming that we got the gift cards intended for my brother.

Help, what should we do? Tell both brothers, one, no-one?

kittylester Thu 08-Feb-24 18:05:05

This Christmas we gave one brother a family games and really nice biscuits and, to the other, we gave nice hot chocolate sachets with marshmallows chocolate flakes.

The brother who we should have got the bigger vouchers usually gives us a box of Fortnum and Mason truffles which I think he bulk orders.

Ali08 Thu 08-Feb-24 15:11:55

£25 in JL, are they having a laugh?
Enjoy your extra gifts, kittylester, it's not your fault your B mixed them up.
Maybe karma just thought it was time you had something nice to spend instead!!
I'm curious, though,what do you normally give to your brothers & OHs for Christmas etc?

Cid24 Tue 06-Feb-24 12:29:03

I think I’d mention to your brother what’s happened. And see what he says.

pascal30 Tue 06-Feb-24 11:02:31

I would say to the giver that you have used the cards given to you and that they mistakenly said £25.. because you were able to spend £75.. and ask him if he made a mistake when he gave them to you.. always be truthful..no come back if you are,,,

Callistemon21 Tue 06-Feb-24 10:37:36

kittylester

It is my assumption that my brother mucked it up - he has form!

I would think of it as serendipity!

kittylester Tue 06-Feb-24 09:58:25

It is my assumption that my brother mucked it up - he has form!

NotSpaghetti Tue 06-Feb-24 09:54:52

I always think it's peculiar that the value is written on the sleeve. I assume the cards have simply been put in the "wrong" sleeves kitty.
It may be JL's or the brother's fault.
I think it was me who wrote the value on last time I bought a gift card though.

Gundy Tue 06-Feb-24 08:06:12

I have been known to regift a card to another person. Imagine their surprise when they go shopping at how generous I was - if that was a “mixed up” card.

CoolCoco Tue 06-Feb-24 07:34:08

I would say nothing - spend the balance, then thank db1 for the cards , telling him what you’ve bought, don’t mention the mix up. Next year, agree not to exchange presents.

kittylester Tue 06-Feb-24 07:24:01

The actual plastic cards had no amount on but they were attached to cards which had amounts written on.

Thank you all for your suggestions. I'll have a think.

jocork Tue 06-Feb-24 02:59:26

If the cards say £25 on them then John Lewis made a mistake when activating them. Some cards are pre-printed like that. Otherwise the cards would be blank and you'd only know what was on them by asking at the till or if DB1 told you or provided the receipt. Tell your brother that JL seem to have made a mistake and ask if he got cards for anyone else who was maybe short changed. Then the ball is in his court.
It probably is a mistake on JL's part if the cards were pre-printed in which case they would carry the loss. If DB2 got cards pre- printed as £75 but got 2x£25 he will assume JL have ripped them off but may not want to say anything for fear of upsetting DB1. I agree it's a dilemma but simply point out there seems to be a mistake on JL's part then your brother will have to decide how to resolve it.
I often give my DiL a gift card and always include the receipt so she knows how much is on it as I buy the ones that can be spent at multiple places which don't have an amount printed on them.

NotSpaghetti Tue 06-Feb-24 00:14:45

Floz

I’d absolutely not involve DB2. What can’t you just blame John Lewis? Say thanks to DB 1, tell him what you bought and say I think JL have slipped up because they seem to think there’s more on the card!

I was just about to say this.
I think this is what I'd do.
It's then up to the gift-giver if he wants to buy more for the other brother!!
😁

knspol Mon 05-Feb-24 22:24:03

I would definitely tell the brother who gave you the cards. He told you they were worth £25 so you know there has been a mistake. It might be worth asking JL how much is on the other card you have in order to give your brother full info because the 2nd card may in fact only be for £25.
You don't actually know the higher value cards were for the other brother, I would be honest about it. Does it matter who they were for? You say yourself that he is much closer to the other brother, so why wouldn't he spend more on him?

Nicksmrs46 Mon 05-Feb-24 19:51:32

I think it’s
Dear Brother No. 1

win Mon 05-Feb-24 19:11:09

Calendargirl

win

I may have misunderstood, but I took it to mean that the OP bought goods to a higher value than showing on the card, expecting to pay the difference, and it was only when JL pointed out there was still cash left on the card that she realised that the amounts were wrong.

Yes that is how understand it too Calendargirl, hence I suggested OP reversed the transaction and only spent £ 50 if anything at all

win Mon 05-Feb-24 19:07:38

Kfimbs

Well, the cards were expected to have value £50 (2x£25) and actually had value £150 (£100 +£50) so maybe John Lewis made a mistake? Or maybe you were supposed to get £50 and your brother and his wife £100 and you received the cards intended for both of you? At the till presumably you gave the cashier both cards expecting to pay extra as well and they used one card completely (£50) and took £28 out of the £100 card leaving £72 on it. Maybe your brother gave cards to several people and they all got mixed up at the present wrapping stage? I’d be inclined to say to your gift giving brother “Thank you, I’ve bought XXX which is lovely, but surprisingly I’ve got value left on the second card. Did you give other people cards? Or maybe JL made a mistake?” No need to say anything to your other brother.

it was 2 x £75 cards for sure if you read back

win Mon 05-Feb-24 19:06:58

grannyactivist

I’d call the brother and tell him you bought something at JL and discovered the amount on the receipts didn’t match the value of the cards. I’d say you wanted to let him know in case there’s been a mix up: if there has, what would he like you to do? and if not you want to thank him for his very generous gift this year.

Absolutely this, honest and straight forward, you might even improve your relationship by being honest and not worrying about what your brothers do between themselves.

Tanjamaltija Mon 05-Feb-24 17:41:30

The cynic in me says that the brother who gave the cards was flustered (in case you find out he was giving the other one preferential treatment) and goofed. Having said that, why do you even expect a gift from him, since you know you are second best; unless he is the richest sibling with money to throw around? Do you give the two of them gifts that are equal in value? Or is it tit-for-tat with you? I'd call him and say there was a discrepancy between the value on the card and the actual value of the gift - a public service, just in case, you know, he finds that his bank account is missing a few pounds.

Desdemona Mon 05-Feb-24 17:33:10

I would spend the other gift card too and say nothing unless specifically asked about it.

Not to be dishonest but perhaps it is just easier? (Avoids any potential friction that could be caused maybe.)

Kfimbs Mon 05-Feb-24 17:04:02

Well, the cards were expected to have value £50 (2x£25) and actually had value £150 (£100 +£50) so maybe John Lewis made a mistake? Or maybe you were supposed to get £50 and your brother and his wife £100 and you received the cards intended for both of you? At the till presumably you gave the cashier both cards expecting to pay extra as well and they used one card completely (£50) and took £28 out of the £100 card leaving £72 on it. Maybe your brother gave cards to several people and they all got mixed up at the present wrapping stage? I’d be inclined to say to your gift giving brother “Thank you, I’ve bought XXX which is lovely, but surprisingly I’ve got value left on the second card. Did you give other people cards? Or maybe JL made a mistake?” No need to say anything to your other brother.

RVK1CR Mon 05-Feb-24 15:03:09

kittylester

Yes we could, of course! It's not about the money for either of us, really. A box of chocolates would have been fine.

I am a bit upset about the inequity of the presents but don't really want to create waves - though, conversely, I'd like them to know that I know.

Tell the brother what you bought. Don't mention what you still have left on the other card, and just say "thank you, such a lovely generous surprise".

newnanny Mon 05-Feb-24 14:49:36

I'd say nothing. BiL won't know if you've spent it yet or not. See if he comes to you to tell you he sent you the wrong one. If he says nothing then neither would I.

Nannan2 Mon 05-Feb-24 14:28:47

Wait until youve spent both.Then just thank him for his generous gift.If the other brother then mentions it to him & he asks you outright how much was on them i'd say "such &such amount, oh but of course they'll be the same as (other brothers name) wont they? silly me, i thought for a minute you had mixed them up" That might make him think twice about giving them more next time.

RVK1CR Mon 05-Feb-24 14:19:58

Not mean at all. My daughter has a new chap, very wealthy, and buys b'day and Christmas presents for him but for me a late 70's pension credit receiver, zero. Then wonders why I am not interested in her new child: best to keep a distance I think as I feel like an outsider.
I would thank the brother and mention what you bought, only he will know whether he intended you to have such a generous gift voucher. Be interesting to see what you receive next year!

Cambsnan Mon 05-Feb-24 14:18:24

How do know it who it was meant for? Could have be someone completely different. Just tell them you think there was a mistake. That said he gave you a gift, not really your business what he gave anyone else is it?