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Grandson calling me Mama

(63 Posts)
BlueBelle Mon 19-Aug-24 16:22:50

Violetsky I don’t have autism but I regularly call each of my grandchildren by my children’s names and vice versa I m sure if I had a dog they get called that name too

Visgir1 Mon 19-Aug-24 16:19:08

My DS when very small called me by my first name for ages... It what he heard the most not Mummy.
I wouldn't get concerned over it...

pandapatch Mon 19-Aug-24 16:17:01

My grandson is just turned 3 and sometimes calls me mum when I'm looking after him. I don't usually bother to correct him - he knows I'm Nanny, I think it's just what he's used to calling when he wants something!! I

Grandmabatty Mon 19-Aug-24 15:48:05

My dgs1 occasionally calls me mum instead of grandma. I just remind him and move on. Stop reading more into it than there is. The issue of childcare is separate

keepingquiet Mon 19-Aug-24 15:44:13

My friend's kids call her Mammar, it's quite normal in their family.

I wouldn't worry about it too much, but it sounds like you need a word with your daughter.

Where's the dad? other grandparents?

Baggs Mon 19-Aug-24 14:59:38

* as if

Baggs Mon 19-Aug-24 14:59:21

It also sounds from your post if you would rather not do as much childcare as you currently are doing. Perhaps talk to your daughter about that.

Baggs Mon 19-Aug-24 14:58:19

You don't mention your grandson's age, Gram2One, but I'm assuming he's quite young. Like others on this thread I don't think you should read too much into his choice of word/name for you.

When my youngest daughter was very little, she called all visitors to the house girls because the most frequent ones (her significantly older sisters) were called "the girls" by me. She just thought everyone who didn't live in the house was a "girl", including men, such as someone else's grandfather who came to a meeting at our house.

The grandfather in question did not mind in the least as he was a retired teacher who understood children.

SpanielCuddler Mon 19-Aug-24 14:49:15

Good answer VioletSky. It is probably his word/ name for an adult female atm.

I taught autistic children for many years. Our youngest daughter was diagnosed with ASD aged 3. Her friend (also autistic) called me Mum all the time when she was young.

Please don’t ignore his attempts to communicate with you. You can reinforce in other ways “ Grandma will do it” “ Come to Grandma” etc

Maybe your daughter could look at a job where she isn’t away so much. There are probably lots of other considerations more significant than what he calls you.

VioletSky Mon 19-Aug-24 14:24:13

I don't think he is calling you "Mama" because he thinks you are his mum or sees you as one

Lots of children with autism have difficulty with names, sometimes because of how they process and store information

I am autistic and very frequently muddle my children's names and as a child would often call my mum by her first name.. because I heard others doing it so my brain couldn't always come up with the correct term

This isn't a sign of anything I don't think

welbeck Mon 19-Aug-24 14:14:44

you are making it easy for her to go away so often, by looking after him so much.

AGAA4 Mon 19-Aug-24 14:08:24

Welcome Gran2One. I'm not surprised your grandson is calling you Mama if your daughter is away so often. Is she away for work or leisure? If it's the latter she needs to realise that you will take her place as his mother figure eventually. If she has to work then you will just need to continually remind him that you are his grandma.

Gram2One Mon 19-Aug-24 14:02:25

Hello everyone. I am new to Gransnet. My daughter will go away on trips for up to 4 days at a time, sometimes every other month and leave my autistic grandson with me. He has begun calling me mama at times, which I ignore until he calls me grandma. He did this again yesterday in front of my daughter. I am hoping this will wake her up to the fact that he needs her and she needs to stop leaving him for such a long stretch of time. It's a lot on me to watch him for such a long length of time while she goes places without him. It's not like I don't watch him every weekend. Any thoughts about this? Thanks