Worrying - any tips on how to calm yourself

I’ve never found that telling myself, or anyone else, to calm down has done a bit of good. One practical way I’ve helped myself is to listen to a good audiobook while getting on with the chores. While I’m listening I’m not ruminating on my worries and gradually my brain settles.

Look up Insight Timer - I have this installed on my phone and you can access a vast array of relaxation exercises of all lengths and sorts - for free!

It helps if I tell myself that my worrying is not going to solve anything.
Think about it carefully, is your worrying doing anything at all, apart from making you upset and maybe feeling ill.
Next distract yourself, I always have music on the radio from as soon as as I get up, make something nice to eat, I made pancakes the other evening as I fancied something sweet, they were delicious.
Dance, sing, watch a comedian on YouTube, I like Peter Kay and a good laugh is so good for you.
Be cheerful, smile….

This is really hard, isn’t it and I’m sure many here will empathise.
There’s little to be done during the night apart from the usual relaxation techniques - I find turning onto my front and breathing deeply can alleviate that unpleasant physical panicky feeling.
And as for the daytime, it’s the old ‘keeping busy’ thing…. I am definitely at my happiest when I am planning things to look forward to (preferably holidays!) or doing voluntary work that can make a real difference to people. Feeling useful rather than just busy can be a way forward.
Failing all that, I wouldn’t hesitate to get professional help.
I hope you feel better soon.

Oh KateyKrunch, I feel for you. I think we all have days even weeks like this, for no apparent reason! Your not on your own in this believe me. 😊.
I do a few things to relax & chill when I'm wound up.
I walk, dance, I do some mending of clothes ect. I also come on Gransnet & faff about a bit! ( highly recommended.)
I also dance ( badly!). I make cakes that I've never baked before too. (often disastrous, sometimes a delight.
All these things help to ease & calm a busy, annoying brain & strung-out body.
Good luck, be happy, be grateful for small tiny blessings & I send my best wishes to you. 🤗

Luckygirl3

Look up Insight Timer - I have this installed on my phone and you can access a vast array of relaxation exercises of all lengths and sorts - for free!

Good stuff Luckygirl13 thank you. 😊

I’m sorry Kateykrunch, I know how you feel. I have periods of what my doctor called “generalised anxiety”.

I stopped listening to the news and I have the radio on a talk programme low all night.
Keeping a diary/journal can help too. Write out your worries, close it and try and forget them.

Antonia Fraser used to memorise a poem each week, as did her mother and they met up to recite it to each other.

I’m a singer and memorise songs. When I have intrusive thoughts, I go through my songs in my mind to stop them.
Maybe memorising favourite poems or even hymns if that is your bent, might help?

Day trips and extended trips away help a lot too, make that an aim for when the weather is better🌺

Interesting thread. Im a worrier too and hate it.

I suffer from health anxiety. Always have. It can be quite debilitating at times. Worrying not only doesn’t change anything it makes me feel worse.

Can you lose yourself in a good book? That’s my go-to, especially when I can’t sleep because of worries on my mind.

KateyKrunch
When you’re anxious your body produces Adrenaline. This is a powerful hormone to help your body in fight or flight.
It’s a powerful hormone for athletes etc because it’s a fuel
But, if you don’t burn that fuel you are causing damage to your body. Blood is pumped to your heart to increase the heart rate. This is why you breath heavy when your anxious, your heart is overworked at this time and your blood pressure is rising.

But, there is something you can do: burn that fuel
You can do this any way you want but it has to be physical enough to make you breath heavy.
You can do star jumps, running on the spot, shadow boxing etc etc.
As well as this practice deep breathing. If you do this properly you can’t stay anxious. When deep breathing that breath must come from your stomach.
There are a myriad of videos on YouTube.
I was fortunate to be taught this over 40 years ago.

It is reckoned by some that it helps if you write down anxieties and worries
If it is a letter you are procrastinating about writing for whatever reason try writing it out in draft I find it helps you not to turn over what to say in your mind
When I was on medication that seemed to wake me up in the night feeling very anxious I found putting the radio on either a program interesting enough to occupy your thought but not exciting enough to stop you falling back asleep

I ‘listen’ to books when I find sleep difficult. Our library service uses Bolinda for audio books and that stops me stewing at night. I usually set the time for an hour and have it on low.

I’ve spend most of my life with anxiety and or depression. These days I just occupy my mind with tv, radio, sewing, cooking etc. Every day I realise how lucky I am to have reasonable health, enough for my needs and a wonderful family. I never used to think this but thinking positive thoughts has been so helpful to me.

I do feel concern for my three girls and their families but I try not to dwell unless I can do something positive to help. I try to be an ear for them when they need to have a grumble or are upset.

I know it can be quite a challenge to prevent worry taking over but I’ve come to believe in the power of positive thinking and mindfulness as useful tools.

I wish you all the best, 💐

It’s an awful feeling, isn’t it? I overthink all the time and worry about my AC and GC too. Meditation helps. I listen to Allie Boothroyd’s yoga nidra using you tube. I have also memorised a meditative blessing to ‘send’ to my AC, DH and myself. If intrusive thoughts interrupt me I start again. I also listen to poetry eg Simon Armitage on you tube.( I find his poetry unsentimental but soothing.)

Today is the tomorrow you worried about and all is well.

My go to is getting stuck into some sort of art or craft. Hours can pass by without thinking of ‘the problem’. It was a lifesaver during Covid too.

RainbowsAndUnicorns1

Today is the tomorrow you worried about and all is well.

My friend says “and this too will pass”. Also.agree with ginny as I have always used painting as a great help. However, I have hardly done any of this over the last year due to health problems. My stress about family and especially about a daughter of mine has gone on for a long time. I can jump from one worry to another. Well I haven’t done myself any good as I now have a photo of a bleeding ulcer I have acquired which is probably a part of my health issues. So I am now trying hard to not overthink about anything I am not in control of. Now will have to get my sketch books out to get an idea for a painting. As soon as this icy weather improves I will have to get out for a walk as at the moment several falls have stopped me doing that.

Firstly make sure you are hydrated and rested, and are not drinking a lot of coffee or tea.

Neurotic worrying and anxiety can normally be addressed by thinking about something else instead. However you have to take responsibility for your own thinking and get into better thinking habits. Some people believe we can't control our thoughts ; this a lie. One can choose what to think about , unless one is psychotic and in need of medical attention.

When a lot of emotional energy has been used up , say after a great loss such as a bereavement, it can be helpful to be prescribed a tranquilliser or take an over the counter herbal tranquilliser ,until the energy comes back.

Thank you everyone, I have found some of the tips interesting and will give some a try. I have crocheted for England today, lovely to keep my mind occupied. Did some very hard Sudoku but found my thoughts intrusive so made mistakes. Been out helping break ice and clear a path to get our car out, hoping for a thaw! Its really interesting other peoples take on this issue and how they have dealt with it I hope we all can feel calmer and less anxious. Thanks again.

It's awful to have this situation, Kateykrunch. A friend was in a dreadful state of anxiety over several months and saw a therapist; one of her suggestions was to imagine a Highway Code bright red 'STOP' sign; hold that image in your mind and say, firmly, 'STOP', then immediately turn to some other occupation like the newspaper - or crocheting! - and you may be surprised at how well that action works to deflect your mind from the corkscrew of worrying.

When I am very anxious or depressed, I find that I cannot concentrate on a book without my mind constantly going back to the worry. But for me J S Bach is a very important composer, relieves my stress and I have to give it full attention, so I have taught myself to concentrate on Bach when he is on the radio, so either play my own copy of Bach or on the radio, and because he has always been so important to me,I can use it to stop me thinking on other lines. I become aware of how tense my body is and can relax a bit

“Look up Insight Timer - I have this installed on my phone and you can access a vast array of relaxation exercises of all lengths and sorts - for free!”

Have just looked at this app- seems to indicate it’s free for 7 days then £35 pa?
How do you get the free access?

I'm another who recommends a relaxation/meditation app.
I use Balance but there are others. Being very prone to catastrophising (?), worrying and getting stressed, usually about minor stuff, I've found this incredibly helpful, especially for promoting positivity and counteracting negative thinking. Balance, and I think others, also has programs for helping your sleep.
Good luck!

SuzieHi

“Look up Insight Timer - I have this installed on my phone and you can access a vast array of relaxation exercises of all lengths and sorts - for free!”

Have just looked at this app- seems to indicate it’s free for 7 days then £35 pa?
How do you get the free access?

Been using it for years and have never paid a bean. You do not have to pay the sub to access most of the site. I just ignore the page about subs and plough on to find what I need - it has never been a problem.