Asking for hand in marriage

Good grief no no …one asked me and I didn’t expect them to, they all just told me and none of them asked for any money either for weddings they all funded their ow.

My son formally asked his now father in law.

I do know that. However, we thought it was a charming way to discuss it with us. It was all top secret and we planned the proposal- or rather he told us his plan and arranged for us all to be at a local hotel to celebrate after he'd popped the question. Luckily, she agreed. It was a very happy start to his joining our family.

Good God know. My DH did not ask my father for my hand in marriage either. If he had, that would have been the end of the engagement.

Asking a father for a daughter's hand in marriage is a hark back to the days when parents controlled their children's lives, especially daughters, almost in perpetuity.

Yes, our SIL asked but that was a number of years ago now.

Certainly not, neithet I nor DH would have expected it.
In our own case, my parents had already made it clear that they thought my beloved was unsuitable, so we just told them we wanted to get married, the implication being that they could like it or lump it.

I like the late Leslie Crowther's alleged reply to Phil Lynott of Thin Lizzie when he asked for his daughter's hand "you might as well you've had everything else" It's all very from another time, we've moved on, daughters don't belong to fathers, well not in western culture at least.

My son in law came to see me and asked my permission, although we both knew it was a given thing. I thought it was sweet of him.

Our SiL came to us with a bottle of whisky for DH, a huge box of chocs for me and a spread sheet of his finances. He'd also located a special diamond online for a ring and wanted to discuss whether I thought DD would like it. Needless to say we were very impressed and are still impressed 18 years later!

Not as such, my daughter's now husband did come to see us before he asked her to marry him, and said he knew she wouldn't want him to ask for our 'permission', as she's nobody's property, but he just wanted to know that we were happy with it, which I thought was quite sweet.

No, and if they had asked I would not have thought them suitable as equal partners for my daughters. Women are not possessions to be passed about.

How about asking ‘Can you keep my daughter in the manner to which she is accustomed’
I once laughingly said this old phrase to one of my twins and she said ‘it would be a bloody poor do if he couldn’t’🙈

No never and wouldn't expect these days.

My DD’s just told me that they were now engaged, I did know their partners of course.I told my own parents proudly that I was now engaged, they seemed happy enough tho may have muttered a bit out of my hearing.