A friend at all costs ?

I think you might have inherited an ex friend of mine. 😂
I ended the friendship over a fiver. That was the straw that broke the camels back 🤬

Next time, say you want separate bills before you order. If she is a friend she wont mind and if she's funny about it, well then you'll know.

Many years ago, I had a similar ‘thing’ with my friend. She only eats fillet steak and I was aware that others weren’t happy splitting the bill - when they’d eaten far more economically. I ‘tactfully’ suggested that she put an extra £5 down, before splitting the bill with the others.

I think she genuinely didn’t realise others weren’t happy.

I like ‘cossy’s* suggestion, but I think I’d actually ask for separate bills.

Well you'll get an idea if you say to her "Look friend - I do enjoy going out for meals - but now I'm retired and money is shorter. So we'll have to go dutch and each pay for our own when we go out for meals". Your husband is right - you do need to bring this up and see what her reaction is.

You may be lucky and she goes "Oh - so sorry...I should have thought of that. I'm sorry. I'd like for us to keep going out for meals - and, of course, we'll go dutch". On the other hand - she may not.

Certainly we hear about it a lot re people expecting to split bills equally - when they've obviously had more expensive food - so she's far from the only one. I think I must have got lucky with friends over the years - as we've always gone dutch and I think we just assumed that's how it would be. To me - part of the reason why this happens is that, if I myself want the dearest item on the menu = I can have it in good conscience (ie because I'm paying for mine fully).

If I'm paying totally - then I say so in advance. If they're paying totally - then I expect them to say so in advance.

She could be either thoughtless on the one hand or a "greedy grabber" (as I call them) on the other hand. You won't know if you don't bring the subject up.

I agree with Cossy.

Yes she’s your friend, just a bit thoughtless and possibly selfish.

Just say “let’s split the FOOD bill 50% 50% and pay for our own drinks”