My mum in law died unexpectedly in September - I miss her dreadfully, she's left a much bigger gap in my life than I realised. I've felt unwilling to say how upset I am, because it seems like detracting from my DH's grief. This is partly because my sister went completely over the top when her ex's mum died and I didn't want to do the same thing. But I've ended up having to go to counselling because I started to feel depressed.
Look after yourself, do whatever it takes. The loss of someone who's shared some aspects of your family life for 40 years is a big thing.
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Bereavement
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