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Bereavement

DD's beautiful funeral.

(121 Posts)
merlotgran Fri 07-Jun-19 11:46:41

Yesterday we laid our precious daughter to rest in a woodland cemetery about half an hour away. She didn't want a religious ceremony but it was spiritual in every way.

Despite a worrying weather forecast at the beginning of the week, there was hardly a cloud in the bluest of skies and a gentle breeze kept us cool as we walked across the wildflower meadow following the hearse. The only sound was birdsong. DH whispered, 'stone curlews' as I held on to my emotions - and him.

The service was simple and comforting. Her elder son gave a eulogy, DD2 read a personal tribute and her younger son read the beautiful poem, 'I am standing upon the seashore' by Henry van Dyke,' which I discovered on another thread on Gransnet. After the committal we listened to George Harrison's 'All Things Must Pass' cleverly provided by DSil via his iPhone and blue tooth speaker.

After the funeral tea I dismantled the beautifully arranged casket spray and made individual posies for guests to take home. There's a rule at the burial ground that all floral tributes must be cleared away after five days and I couldn't bear the thought of having to return to the sight of dead flowers. DD would have approved of my last minute 'brainwave.'

So, today I'm exhausted, relieved that it all went so well and sad because everyone has gone home but we both need to rest now. The last four months have drained us, physically and emotionally.

I am going to miss her so much.

crazyH Fri 07-Jun-19 11:51:55

Merlot, how did you do it? Both of you and the family. My heart is aching for you all. Brave flowers

Greyduster Fri 07-Jun-19 11:52:34

Merlot thank you for finding the strength to post that lovely tribute to your daughter. I can only imagine how much you will miss her - and how I would feel in your place if it was my daughter. My heart goes out to you.💐💐

Ngaio1 Fri 07-Jun-19 11:52:52

My word. That was both a beautiful and emotional post. I know it is a short while since you brought your DD home to tend her. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. God Bless

Cherrytree59 Fri 07-Jun-19 11:53:10

Merlot your darling daughter's service sounded truly beautiful.
Xxxx

Anniebach Fri 07-Jun-19 11:53:38

Merlot x

Nonnie Fri 07-Jun-19 11:55:08

Sounds like you gave her the send off she would have liked. I think you will get comfort from this in due course. I won't go into detail but we felt we gave DS the right funeral too and now, a couple of years later we take some comfort from it.

Alima Fri 07-Jun-19 11:56:23

Merlot x

Bathsheba Fri 07-Jun-19 11:56:37

I can find no words Merlot, only God Bless you all flowers

Riverwalk Fri 07-Jun-19 11:57:00

Merlot I've a big lump in my throat reading about your daughter's funeral. It sounds as beautiful as such a day could be flowers

lemongrove Fri 07-Jun-19 11:57:08

Merlot what a moving description, I couldn’t read it with dry eyes.You managed to get through it and even find some crumbs of comfort from it.I hope you all find the strength to carry on and help each other as a family.flowers

Lilypops Fri 07-Jun-19 11:57:10

Merlot gran , I have been following but not commenting on your sad journey, I was moved to tears reading your post about your beautiful daughters funeral, I cannot imagine how you must be feeling , Your daughter is now at peace , free from pain, she was surrounded by your love,
I hope you and your family and daughters family can find solitude and rest and begin the process of grief, Sending love,

Ginny42 Fri 07-Jun-19 11:58:02

What a beautiful tribute to your beautiful girl with wild flowers and birdsong, surrounded by people who loved her. Rest and get your strength back. She has left her lovely children for you to care for and love and who will love you. xx

Fennel Fri 07-Jun-19 12:11:08

The funeral sounds beautiful, though heartbreaking for all of you.
Love from me as well to all of you. Only time will heal . xx

Urmstongran Fri 07-Jun-19 12:14:36

Oh merlotgran I read your post and wiped away tears when I’d finished. Please accept my sincere condolences on the loss of your much loved daughter. x

Alygran Fri 07-Jun-19 12:14:52

Merlot thinking of you and your family. The funeral sounds beautiful. Xx

Callistemon Fri 07-Jun-19 12:16:03

merlot that sounds truly beautiful and what your darling daughter would have wanted.
flowers

pinkquartz Fri 07-Jun-19 12:22:20

that was so beautiful. [flowers} you have given your daughter such a lovely tribute

Squiffy Fri 07-Jun-19 12:27:05

Merlot I hope that describing a funeral as beautiful comes across in the right way. From the birdsong, the meadow and your brilliant idea with the flowers, it sounds as though it was as perfect as it was possible to be. Thank you for posting this thread.

Boosgran Fri 07-Jun-19 12:31:50

What a beautiful and truly moving post merlotgran. My heart goes out to you for your loss. I sincerely hope your darling daughter is now at peace.

Elvive Fri 07-Jun-19 12:36:16

very dignified.

thisisnotme Fri 07-Jun-19 12:42:12

What a beautiful tribute to your daughter.
My condolences to you and your family, I am so very sorry for your loss.

aggie Fri 07-Jun-19 12:47:57

No Words xxxxx

Annapops Fri 07-Jun-19 12:50:08

Thinking of you at this sad time. If there is such a thing as a perfect funeral this sounds so close. Wishing you and your family strength over the days and weeks to come.

lovebeigecardigans1955 Fri 07-Jun-19 12:53:06

That is a lovely tribute to your daughter Merlot and I hope it brings some comfort flowers at this very sad time.