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Bereavement

Missing someone

(390 Posts)
MissAdventure Mon 09-Sept-24 10:10:24

Just a thread for anyone who is feeling their loss keenly at anytime, and however long it's been.

Finding it all quite a struggle these last few months, missing my girl, but I don't really have anyone to tell.

Greyduster Mon 09-Sept-24 11:45:28

Sometimes its liveable, and i can pack it away in a box on my head. Other times I can't. MissA* that’s the nature of grief. Although I have recently experienced my own loss, I can’t imagine the agony of losing a child. I don’t know how you come back from it and I don’t wonder you are finding it a struggle. The loss of a life half lived is deeply different to that of a life long lived. My heart goes out to you.💐
Kitty, I would have liked your friend😁!

MissAdventure Mon 09-Sept-24 11:47:44

Mrs knit your own coffee morning sounds fun, Kitty.

It's all the "in jokes" that you miss too, isn't it?

I always want to say I have an "appoinkment" because that's what we said.

Grammaretto Mon 09-Sept-24 12:03:04

Oh MissA. It's horrible 😢.
This time of year too.
DH died nearly 4 years ago and I wish he'd just walk in the door now.
I try speaking to him. Maybe it helps a bit.
I try so hard to keep strong and busy but there is just no-one to replace him.
Hugs for us all. 🤗 ❤️

sodapop Mon 09-Sept-24 12:04:31

Bang on all you want to on here MissA most of us have lost someone close and relate to how you feel. Good days and bad ones, we all know about that.
Thinking of you thanks

Grandyma Mon 09-Sept-24 12:06:27

MissAdventure 💐

MissAdventure Mon 09-Sept-24 12:17:57

Grammaretto

Oh MissA. It's horrible 😢.
This time of year too.
DH died nearly 4 years ago and I wish he'd just walk in the door now.
I try speaking to him. Maybe it helps a bit.
I try so hard to keep strong and busy but there is just no-one to replace him.
Hugs for us all. 🤗 ❤️

I can remember some of the members bereavements (cant remember what I did yesterday!) and always thought you were very resilient.

I know that feeling of just imagining the door opening and our missed people coming in, just how we remember them.

Norah Mon 09-Sept-24 12:20:10

MissAdventure

Just a thread for anyone who is feeling their loss keenly at anytime, and however long it's been.

Finding it all quite a struggle these last few months, missing my girl, but I don't really have anyone to tell.

I'm listening. flowers

We've 4 daughters. I was pregnant 8 times. I miss those we didn't raise, life has hard times built in - with loss, the struggle never ends.

Kate1949 Mon 09-Sept-24 12:24:44

I agree that we are all resilient. Losing a child is the worst. Thankfully it hasn't happened to me but my lovely nephew died at 16 (my brother's son). We all went through that nightmare together. My brother's wife died a few years later at 49. How my brother has picked himself up after his double tragedies is beyond me. But he has.

Luckygirl3 Mon 09-Sept-24 12:27:07

MissA - it is so hard for you and I am sending lots of hugs.

My OH died 4 years ago, but last Weds was his birthday and yesterday was mine so it all comes into sharper focus.

The grief walks beside us however hard we work at continuing with some sort of normal life. Mostly I think I have learned to live with it, but memories of him when he was normal creep back and it is hard not to resent all that was and has been lost.

1summer Mon 09-Sept-24 12:48:36

My DH died just 2 years ago and I have just been ill for the first time in along time. A really bad dose of Covid, it threw everything at me ( I tested due to having to go into hospital tomorrow for a small procedure).
I was weeping due to him not being here to help me, getting me a drink of water, cup of tea, slice of toast. I feel guilty as I know lots of people live alone and have to cope but I miss him so much.

MissAdventure Mon 09-Sept-24 12:53:04

I certainly remember your handsome man, Isummer.
You posted perhaps a wedding pic (?) at sometime, and said that he was very ill now.
He had such a kind face.

Summerfly Mon 09-Sept-24 12:58:38

Losing a child, no matter their age is the worst thing in the world. I lost my beautiful daughter at just 4months old, my sister lost hers at 28yrs and my sil lost her son at 17yrs. The pain never leaves us does it?
Sending you big hugs and love MissA 💐

1summer Mon 09-Sept-24 13:00:29

MissAdventure

I certainly remember your handsome man, Isummer.
You posted perhaps a wedding pic (?) at sometime, and said that he was very ill now.
He had such a kind face.

Oh yes I remember, we posted pictures of our wedding days. Thank you Miss A he was a lovely man. He died 8 days before our 40th anniversary.

Summerfly Mon 09-Sept-24 13:00:33

Bless you 1Summer 💐

GrannySomerset Mon 09-Sept-24 13:08:17

The Tennyson poem “Break, break, break” says it all for me - “But O for the touch of a vanish’d hand, and the sound of a voice that is still”. Do look it up.

And no, I don’t know think it gets easier, rather it becomes part of the now diminished you.

ilovepuffins Mon 09-Sept-24 16:15:22

Thank you for this thread MissA
I can't imagine how hard it must be to lose your daughter...my heart goes out to you.
We lost Dad just under 3 weeks ago (funeral next week)
Having been widowed at a young age I know that this first period of shock and pain will likely ease but right now it just so incredibly hard

downtoearth Mon 09-Sept-24 16:40:26

MissA I understand that feeling 💐

valdavi Mon 09-Sept-24 16:49:48

Yes thank you for the thread MissA. I lost my neice a few years back, the loveliest young woman you could imagine,at 29. It is difficult to for me to imagine how sister & B-i-L survived.But your threads always make me laugh, you're not one of the pessimists, but one of the highlights on most threads so even though you of course still grieve, you're cheering up others all the time. One loss you havent had is your sense of humour sunshine

MissAdventure Mon 09-Sept-24 17:54:00

valdavi
When my daughter tried on a wig which was attached to an elastic headband, she said "I feel as if raising my eyebrows really quickly would make it ping off my head!"
She demonstrated what she meant, and we had a laugh at that.

valdavi Mon 09-Sept-24 18:31:05

gringrin

crazyH Mon 09-Sept-24 19:00:24

MissA - I don’t know where you will find the strength to cope with such a sad loss, but I hope you will flowers. Thinking of you xx

loopyloo Mon 09-Sept-24 19:01:26

Miss A, you are not alone.
Yes your posts are much appreciated.

flappergirl Mon 09-Sept-24 20:08:03

Sending you so much love MissAdventure. You're in my thoughts. Please never feel uncomfortable sharing your sorrow.

MissAdventure Mon 09-Sept-24 20:17:44

smile
Oh, you are nice lot.
Thank you.

Doodle Mon 09-Sept-24 20:32:15

MissAdventure I’m so sorry. It must be hard for you not being able to talk things over with anyone.
I had one of those days today when I’ve been crying all day long. A lovely lady came and sat next to me in in the park. She gave me a hug and said a few prayers for me and DH. She was so kind.
Glad you decided to post about it. It’s like a taboo subject that no one wants to talk about. Loss is so painful.
I’m lucky I have a good friends to talk to. I try not to let the family know how bad I am. Nothing they can do anyway.
I’m always here if you want to PM me and let it out. I’m not much help to man not beast at the moment but can still listen and send hugs. x