Gransnet forums

Bereavement

Newly widowed

(108 Posts)
HelterSkelter1 Tue 18-Aug-26 07:07:56

My dear DH died 6 days ago after a long illness. I know from reading these threads over the past 2 years that I have a long journey ahead.

His death was not unexpected, but was still a great shock. He died at home so my feet take me into his room and I expect to see him there.

He was so unwell and the last days in pain so for him it was a release and for us a relief. So final and so hard.

Indiebee Sun 23-Aug-26 18:55:22

Dear Helterskelter and Barleysugar, I am so sorry. Been there too, 17 years ago. It never goes away but the beginning is especially terrible. Hope you can eat, sleep, maybe have counselling, and above all turn to your friends and family and ask for help when you need it. Thinking of you and all here who have lost our beloveds.

HelterSkelter1 Mon 24-Aug-26 03:26:05

Thank you Indiebee. Barleysugar and I are in touch now. She lost her husband a few days before I did. So we are both at the very raw stage.
All the posts on this thread have been very kind and very comforting.

Apart from crying once with my DD I don't seem able to cry although I am so sad. I just read on the Mariecurie site that this numbness is very normal which was consoling. And I am not a crying person anyway.
I am going to ring MarieCurie when they open their helpline this morning.
I expect this 3.00 am cup of tea and honey sandwich is normal too.

Indiebee Mon 24-Aug-26 08:19:33

So glad you are both in touch. And also that you will ring MarieCurie. Macmillan is another option. The hospice where DH died provided bereavement counselling for me and it really helped to be able to pour out sadness and questions.

Eating and sleeping are hard. Follow whichever solutions suit you best. There is no right way and we are all so different. Thinking of you.

Mystyeyes11 Mon 31-Aug-26 19:50:46

My heartfelt condolences HelterSkelter when you love deep you also grieve deep. Allow every tear to come my tears are still flowing plentifully, i see my tears as kisses for my DH. Be kind to yourself there is no time limit to grief.

SuzieHi Mon 31-Aug-26 21:27:11

💐sending best wishes to you. Accept help offered and lean on family and good friends for support

Stumpie1 Wed 02-Sept-26 08:43:58

Heartbreaking post ❤️

fancyflowers Wed 02-Sept-26 10:43:01

Sending love to you, this must be very hard. flowers