Home care package for 92 year old father

Mishap my heart goes out to you xxx

Remember that I'm in Devon and the offer stands!

Mishap What on earth is going on? This cannot be allowed to continue. Your father's treatment is disgusting. Go to your local newspaper. Make a FUSS. I'm so sorry

And mine!

Mishap that is shocking. I'm so sorry that your poor dad is going through all this

Just caught up Mishap. I'm so sorry about what's happened with your Dad. It's disgraceful. The NHS is going downhill rapidly, goodness knows where it will stop.

My mum failed to get into her flat. We had to pull the plug on buying it as she too was getting worse by the day in hospital. If all her scans had been done sooner without a week's wait between each she would have been out a lot quicker than the six weeks she spent sitting there. She's now in a small but sunny room in the care home opposite the flats she should have gone too. After a week she's so much better, but missing her home and most of all her dog and stays in her room as she finds it very difficult coping with the state of the other patients.

It's so much the luck of the draw. Luckily the staff in this home seem pretty good and she is, we suppose, in the right place to get the care she'll eventually need as the cancer progresses.

I have to add that mum being diagnosed with cancer has made an enormous difference to her care package. The magic C word means doors open which aren't available to people like your dad Mishap. If only all patients got the service and care available to cancer sufferers.

Mishap if you can bear it, now is the time to make the complaints. Ring up and ask to speak to the senior nursing officer, and to the Director of Clinical Medicine, write to the Chair of the Trust and copy to your MP. Ask the hospital about their formal complaint procedure and make it clear you are following through. Unfortunately, in our experience, sharing your concerns with the ward staff can easily be ignored. And I agree with soop, the local press as well.

Mishap I have said time and time again, 'What happens to the elderly who have no visitors?' It's shocking that we have to badger and complain just to get them the bare minimum of care. Feeling helpless is the worst part.

Yesterday I had to sign some forms resulting from a meeting I had with mum's care manager before Christmas. She has only just had them typed up and wanted me to date my signature 5th December. I gleefully wrote 14th March and received a look of absolute fury. The social care team will be in next Wednesday at my request and I refuse to cover up the care home's sloppy admin. When I pointed out that mum only has a good lunch because I go in every day to liquidise it and feed it to her she replied, 'Well one good meal a day is OK isn't it?'

Nfk I'm sorry to hear that your mum didn't manage to get her own flat. She is in the right place though. I am fighting to keep mum where she is even though I have had to take on a huge amount of care because if I don't she will be moved an hour away as there is nowhere local that will take her.

No wonder our stress levels go through the roof!

Mishap I am absolutely horrified at what your dad has gone through. You must be really worn out with worry. As others have said the time has come for heavy duty complaints procedure! I used to work in a hospital and the "higher ups" get very anxious when they get well documented complaints. Since you are not close by perhaps your role could be to document in minute detail everything that has happened since your dad went into hospital "a healthy man" and get the complaints procedure started. It takes so much energy when you don't have much ( I know I have been through it) but it is so important to pursue it. and lots of . I am so sad for you. Sending you golden thoughts!

I have been following this thread with a heavy heart and havn't commented before for the fact I am living in denial of my DH's worsening memory problems. When I read just what is happening to some of your loved ones I am so fearful of what might happen to him if anything happens to me first. I send my very heartfelt warm wishes and sympathy to you all.

Thanks for all kind posts; I am sorry for otehrs with the same worries on their plates.

It has been a sorry saga with poor Dad. One of the reasons that I have not taken it further (except for our letter to consultant and complaint about care home to health authority who commissioned his care there) is that my sister bears the brunt of it all as she lives locally, and I am fearful of making her life more difficult as she has other enormous problems on her hands. (highly disturbed and violent teenage son; 2 lots of breast cancer).

I will discuss it fither with sister and brother and think how we might take things forward - we just want him to be as well as possible given his age; and we want him to go home and have some independence and dignity restored to him.

Mishap I wish that I could do something positive on your father's behalf.

There was just something on the world at,one about complaints. Sorry I was dozing, I think it's Anne clewyd? Who's taken on complaints!

Google news has a page on the inquiry by Ann Clewyd It is uncomfortable reading .Iust hope something is done.

Or even just!!

The trouble is the lack of money. Far better for the government to spend our taxes on fighter planes and aid to China.

I have emailed Ann Clwyd via her website. Thanks for flagging this up for me.

Mishap For goodness sake, I hope that someone [in authority] listens to what you have to say.

Mishap I've just seen this thread. You are clearly already well versed in geriatric care issues but have scanned through the responses, no-one has mentioned Help the Aged, or have they? I only say this from the perspective of an ex-pat so it may not be relevant, but my housebound adopted mother (86) with chronic osteoporosis and macular degeneration has been very well covered by that organisation and is able to live at home. (Albeit that her granddaughter has a high profile job in Social Care) - I know that she has moved mountains on her behalf, often with the assistance of HTA. Honorary Mum lives in Staffordshire - infamous for other reasons at the moment!
This problem is only going to get worse and it seems that no government has either the will or the motivation to tackle it.

Lilygran has given excellent advice. This is exactly what you should do.
Unfortunately most people feel unable to do this.
Wisewoman has highlighted that 'highers up' get very anxious when complaints are made, especially in the wake of Staffordshire.
it's your father. Kick up a fuss before it gets worse

I echo Orca's suggestion - KICK UP A FUSS...
Because your father cannot do so on his own behalf.

Latest update:

- 2 days ago my sister went in and there was a capsule on the locker. She asked the nurse what it was and she said "Oh it's one of his antibiotics - we can't give it to him now as we don't know when it should have neem taken."

- on Sunday afternoon she went in and he said he had had no lunch - my sister tried to check with the nurse who said she didn't know whether he had or not.

- we have just had a call to say he has had a fall and is awaiting an ambulance to take him to another hospital for an x-ray - possible injury to wrist and shoulder. The cottage hospital where he is has an x-ray dept but it is not manned on a Tuesday so they are going to cart him off round the countryside to another hospital. Might be better if they bussed in a radiographer. Sigh.

Oh dear, is there no end to it? I hope you've forwarded this latest update to Anne. Clwyd.

This is getting silly!
WRITE TO YOUR MP. THE PM. ANNE CLEWYDD.

RING THE PRESS! Quote Stafford!

And maybe use this site to make your concerns public

https://www.patientopinion.org.uk

Log onto the Palrliamentary Web Site and find the e.mail address of Jeremy Hunt and others in the Health Dept.

You must log your complaint and copy your e.mail replies.

Go to the top. What does your fathers GP have to say about this. I agree about the use of the media.

My Aunt suffered whilst in hospital at Somerset in 2009. She kept saying she had a pain in her hip and was ignored by the complete hospital staff, top to bottom. She suffered for 3 months, getting bed sores, suffering staff trying to make her walk. After a lot of family complaints it was discovered the hip operation she had undergone had been a disaster and she had been suffering because of their neglect.

I despair at stories such as this.