hi everyone,
mum is 98, yes an amazing lady. she lives alone 55 miles away from me. my sister lives in nz.
has always, always said from about the age of 50, 'don't you ever put me in a care home'.
Now she has been diagnosed with dementia.
Well the time has come when we all think she would be happier, less lonely and safer in a care home. But how does one go about arranging this. she does not have enough money to be self funding.
has had an assessment from social services who decided in their wisdom that mum was quite capable to look after herself at home, without any help from s.s. to be fair, mum did manage to put on a very good show when the social worker came, but almost collapsed into her chair when they left.
I have just had to have her gas hob turned off as she was using the gas to heat her electric kettle. twice this happened, i reported it to social worker who said get her a microwave. but i had to throw mums microwave out as she did not understand how to use it. i.e. cook for 2 mins. on packet, mum would cook for 20 mins. resulting in black smoke filling her kitchen. very unsafe, but social worker did not register that. Mum is now just cooking ready meals in electric oven, but i feel before too long she will loose her ability to do that.
any ideas. do i just say to s.s. that i think my mum should move to a care home, or do i, as one social worker suggested to me, wait for a crisis to happen.
