Children and babies at weddings.

My grandson and his fiancee are getting married in August - their own little girls, aged 5 and 2, will be bridesmaids! Most of their friends have children about the same age. When my daughter got married we had a children's entertainer and the children had a special meal in a side room. The speeches would have bored them anyway. Children over 10 were give the choice of sitting with the adults or not - they all chose the children's room.

Oh, thanks - some good suggestions. I've had a peek at Cox&Cox for ideas, but on the whole I'm pretty much sorted - apart from the weather. I wonder if iamjing can get a long range weather forecast from her son who's in the business ???

Hilda I love the idea of a children's table what fun! I agree with many of you that children should be invited. Another problem is that as weddings these days are often held in country houses, or some distance away, people book into a local hotel. This has happened to us several times. My DS and wife didn't go as it meant leaving the children with a babysitter - non family member - as the family were going to the wedding. As on both occasions they had a small baby they weren't ready to leave her with a 'stranger' let alone a member of the family. I know children can be a bit over-excited on these occasions hence the playleader. My 3 year old was as good as gold when she was a tiny bridesmaid last year and loved the eating and dancing later. As she and I began to wilt about 8.30 we took ourselves off.

HildaW. What a brilliant idea, it sounds as though you will all share a lovely day. The couple getting married must have a very warm nature, if they do start a family, what lucky children they will have.

AS for the original question, my daughter no longer goes to a wedding without children as it does not suit. I fully appreciate it is upto the couple getting married though. It is quite sad really because good friends miss sharing the big day, quite regrettable.

They have POGS, they might both be young but they see it as a celebration to be enjoyed by all they care for. Both have had a few ups and downs and see it as a public way of truly counting their blessings.

HildaW, Lovely!

Hilda - Sounds like a perfect start for them both.

It is difficult, isn't it? My daughter grew up with her cousin, and was very hurt when her little ones were not invited to her cousin's wedding. She chose not to go, as she didn't want to leave her children, and finding an all-day babysitter was difficult. Sadly, their relationship has never fully recovered. My son and his wife, on the other hand, much prefer to go without their children, as they can relax and enjoy themselves. Children were invited to both my son's and daughter's weddings, and a brilliant time was had by all. It's horses for courses, I guess. Good luck, Hilda - it sounds lovely.

Some years ago my daughter went to her stepsister's wedding with her DH and DS who was then about 20 months old. We offered to look after him but she wanted to take him until the evening when we would collect him and take him home to bed. When we arrived to collect him at 8pm she was nearly in tears as she thought he had spoiled the bride's day as he had fidgeted and grizzled all through the meal/speeches. She had not enjoyed the day at all and was quite relieved to hand him over!. I do think weddings can be boring for very young children. We have always had close family children there and those of parents who have to travel some distance but it is difficult when you know from experience some guests have the children from hell who just run riot. My close friend is getting married soon and she has excluded all children but her own DGC just so she does not have to invite her sister's children who are totally out of control.