Do you have purpose in your life?

Although I sometimes feel overloaded and complain, I think the help I give to various family members provides structure and meaning and a sense of satisfaction in my life.

Apart from that I think trying to enjoy my life, living it in a beneficial way and developing strengths to enable me to cope with any adversity that comes my way in what I try to do.

At a trivial level, I get into little projects which make life meaningful. Last year I became obsessed with knitting dolls and dressing them to represent the people I was giving them to (not as spooky as it sounds, they were good luck dolls). I must have done sixty at least. At the moment it's trying to develop my inner gardener and finding ways to change my diet to get rid of stomach bloat.

I have found many of the comments on this thread to be a comfort and an inspiration.

jo4
<< the Sod It! Club? >>
You've cheered me up.

Well, most people that do truly great things seem to do so before the age of thirty. So, perhaps I should have said 'sod it' thirty years ago. Damned annoyed that I didn't read this then cause it would have saved me thirty years . Everyone in my family seem to be obsessed with property; buying it and doing it up....even I seem to be caught in this trap of my own making, as a friend once said 'we are all slaves to our homes'. I wonder if, in Europe where [or so I understand] more people rent property than buy it, there is a different attitiude? I have set myself till the middle of August to turn my house round so I can enjoy it for a bit before I think about downsizing.

If your life has a purpose, at what point in life would you expect to attain that purpose?

I mean, at what point is it ok to say, "Whoops. Didn't make it", and relax, sit back, and join the Sod It! Club?

My purpose is life?Too enjoy it I suppose. I have a wonderful son and DIL with two lovely little GD's who I adore. I have a wonderful daughter who is a great friend and loads of fun. I have good friends and a job I enjoy. As soon as it stops raining so much and starts acting like summer I might cheer up bit. I'm getting cabin fever. So my purpose is to look after my health so I can enjoy the years I have left, quite a few I hope, also to be of some use to my family.

"What is the purpose of life?" is perhaps a different question from "Do you have a purpose in your life?"

The first is a philosophical question to which I believe there really is no answer, along with most of the other big questions - and accepting that is one of the keys to happiness.

But the other question does I think have an answer - and it is a different one for each person. For me it is to enjoy myself as much as I can and make it possible (as far as I am able) for others around me to enjoy themselves.

I am sorry HildaW that you are finding things hard at the moment. Shyness and being " too darn sensitive" are two aspects of the same problem - which is worrying too much what others think of us. I think that retirement should be a time when we try to stop worrying about that and do our own thing and be ourselves - if we can't do it now, we never will! You sound quite gloomy at the moment and that can get into a spiral - very hard to see good things when you are feeling like that. Is the GP sympathetic? Maybe a little bit of chemical help to get over the hurdle of the negative thinking and set you on the right road? Or buy a CBT manual (there is one called "CBT for Dummies") - CBT is Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, in case you are not familiar with it - it helps us to recognise and reassess our ingrained patterns of thought and to see that some might be having a negative effect - it also helps us to escape from that pattern. It has a very good track record for helping people to jump off the wheel and live a bit!

nanaej

'Yes the only measure of your words and your deeds
Will be the love you leave behind when you're done'

Words of a Roy Baily song and think it is not a bad thought!

Hilda I think most us have days when we are "gloomy", I certainly do. I try to enjoy my life as much as I can on the other days!
I don't feel the need for a purpose,I would just like to get through the rest of my life without being a burden to anyone, and without worrying myself to death!

My purpose it to be a support to everyone. I know that I am not a gogetter in my own right but have always been happy being part of the backroom staff! But, as gracesmum said on another thread, sometimes there seem to be quite a few people looking for support!

I love my family and good friends and I am loved back. Of that I'm sure. That's enough purpose to keep me going!

But you do a pretty good golden glow, Golden

I can't really think of any other purpose for me other than being a good loving partner, mother , mother-in-law ,Granny, and friend. that has made me wonder if I stand out in my own right, but I don'tthink I do. I will just have to settle for that, I'm never going to set the world on fire.

Glassortwo, thanks m'dear.

..and Marvin the paranoid android stuff as well,,,,

...keep thinking of Catch 22 stuff.....

Grannylin great idea to have the note pad. I had one on the go after J died, if only to remind myself what I had done the day before and not to repeat it as my brain had gone to jelly. I think I will start it up again once back from my travels so I have something small but definite to aim for. If I don't achieve the tasks, then I can then be very cross with myself!!

Haven't a clue about what my purpose is, but I'm enjoying making my life meaningful with family and friends, and I try to keep well enough to be independent and helpful to others. I usually have some new thing on the go to make my life interesting and creative, and this week it's my new toy - sewing machine!

I'm hoping that the purpose of my life will become clear eventually, but perhaps that won't be until it's over!

My purpose in life at the moment is revolved around being here for 2 of my GC, while their Mum works and also getting our house finished.

Hilda once you get into that mind set its difficult to shake isn't it I can relate to "Years of artificially overcoming shyness has sometimes made me seem a lot more ballsy than I am." The face we show others is not necessarily the real person. Try to give yourself that push and don't worry I think most people have the same insecurities about doing something new!!

I agree with everyone so far!Gally you're a great role model. I've been through a few things in the last 10 years and have finally decided my purpose is to enjoy myself. I can still be a good Mum or Gran but to achieve this I've got to be happy in myself and I've made my mantra 'Why suffer!' I have to do what nanaej suggested otherwise I can waste hours searching the internet, imagining good/bad things, feeling lonely, not cleaning the house....I have a notebook next to the computer and every evening I write down at least 4 things for the next day and one of the things has to be something physical. I also keep a list of friends and family in the back and tick when I have seen them to make sure I don't let friendships pass. It works!

If we're getting deep, I don't think Life as such has a purpose. I understand it as an accident of atoms. But I do think individual lives can have a sense of purpose and that individuals who do have that sense are happier. Speaking for myself, creativity has a lot to do with my sense of purpose and, since I'm still at it, instilling good principles into my kids. I'd be miserable if I failed at that and had no creativity inside me I think.

tanith I hadn't really thought about it but I think I feel a bit the same way, and am happy with it.

If there is a purpose in life, I think it is to do our best to try to make the world a better place, no matter how tiny our efforts may seem. And even that work, I find, isn't usually dictated by a timetable, unless, of course, there's a plane to catch!

Sounds a bit pious, but I do believe it!

nanaej, thanks for your kind thoughts.
I probably sounded very gloomy, more than I propbaly am most of the time. I know I should be more positive but when you are having a fit of the gloomies its very difficult to see the other side. Too many life changes came at the wrong time and also I never was much good at making friends, as my Mum used to tell me I was always too darn sensitive. Years of artificially overcoming shyness has sometimes made me seem a lot more ballsy than I am. I sometimes wish that shyness was not seen as a trait that needed 'curing' because years of pushing myself because it was needed for job etc etc has not always done me favours. Never mind, daughter has just posted photo of my two GC on facebook. They are being adorably naughty...that always makes me smile.

My purpose in life nowadays is to do whatever takes my fancy every day whether it be running around like a headless chicken on errands for family and self or relaxing by reading, swimming or just sitting watching the world go by and I'm very happy doing any of those things ..I spent too much time clock watching and working and now there is no timetable , maybe that is my purpose now . To live the rest of my life without a timetable.. time for whatever comes my way.