Do you have purpose in your life?

My granddaughter .

Love. My love for my family & friends and life/ world in general! The love that I have from my family and friends.

Being a mum and grandma.

Probably not – I'm a shocking drifter. I'm certainly not useful.

Stay alive!

Must admit this subject does trouble me a bit......am still in a bit of a mental no man's land having come out of a bit too much stress than I can now cope with (was a lot better at it once but am now not). Have tried to get a bit of support from GP for the way I feel but think its just going to be a fact of life from now on. The trouble is that it leaves me feeling 'whats the point' a lot and that means I waste so much time doing 'what ifs' etc. Deep down I should do more but the fear of messing up and being a laughing stock is very real to me at the moment.
I have two lovely GC and two wonderful daughters but somedays even the thought of them is not enough to shake me up to actually do more than go through the motions.
What gets me is that if I manage to push myself out of the door...walk the dog etc then I feel a lot better but its that initial step. I do have a sweet other half but hes not got much clue how I feel really. If I'm quiet and withdrawn he seems to feel he should keep out of my way till I snap out.
Then of course I write this down and a voice says 'what have you got to moan about?'......many worse off, it just makes me cross that I dont push myself, but its like living in a state of fear really.

Oh Hilda sorry life is feeling so tricky for you at the moment. Is there anyone you could do things with? I find I have to be very proactive in organising my 'free' time otherwise I discover I have a day to myself and nothing particular planned and find that can get me down.

I went to a 'managing your retirement' seminar and that suggested using a diary and putting something small down everyday and doing it! e.g read 4 chapters of book, walk to the park. Just small things but making yourself do it. I have found that helps me to get a structure and keep busy..less time to think.

Good luck.

Purpose in life? Well, some days I don't think there is but on better days I try to look to the future and imagine what I will be doing one year down the line from where I am right now; quite difficult to imagine really. I try to concentrate on my daughters and grandchildren, but you can't live your life through them; I am doing all kinds of things I never had to do before which, in itself is quite liberating but frightening at the same time. I think I am aiming at being not lonely and not sad, waiting for the day when I can wake up and look back with happiness and forward with anticipation and hope

My purpose in life nowadays is to do whatever takes my fancy every day whether it be running around like a headless chicken on errands for family and self or relaxing by reading, swimming or just sitting watching the world go by and I'm very happy doing any of those things ..I spent too much time clock watching and working and now there is no timetable , maybe that is my purpose now . To live the rest of my life without a timetable.. time for whatever comes my way.

nanaej, thanks for your kind thoughts.
I probably sounded very gloomy, more than I propbaly am most of the time. I know I should be more positive but when you are having a fit of the gloomies its very difficult to see the other side. Too many life changes came at the wrong time and also I never was much good at making friends, as my Mum used to tell me I was always too darn sensitive. Years of artificially overcoming shyness has sometimes made me seem a lot more ballsy than I am. I sometimes wish that shyness was not seen as a trait that needed 'curing' because years of pushing myself because it was needed for job etc etc has not always done me favours. Never mind, daughter has just posted photo of my two GC on facebook. They are being adorably naughty...that always makes me smile.

tanith I hadn't really thought about it but I think I feel a bit the same way, and am happy with it.

If there is a purpose in life, I think it is to do our best to try to make the world a better place, no matter how tiny our efforts may seem. And even that work, I find, isn't usually dictated by a timetable, unless, of course, there's a plane to catch!

Sounds a bit pious, but I do believe it!

If we're getting deep, I don't think Life as such has a purpose. I understand it as an accident of atoms. But I do think individual lives can have a sense of purpose and that individuals who do have that sense are happier. Speaking for myself, creativity has a lot to do with my sense of purpose and, since I'm still at it, instilling good principles into my kids. I'd be miserable if I failed at that and had no creativity inside me I think.

I agree with everyone so far!Gally you're a great role model. I've been through a few things in the last 10 years and have finally decided my purpose is to enjoy myself. I can still be a good Mum or Gran but to achieve this I've got to be happy in myself and I've made my mantra 'Why suffer!' I have to do what nanaej suggested otherwise I can waste hours searching the internet, imagining good/bad things, feeling lonely, not cleaning the house....I have a notebook next to the computer and every evening I write down at least 4 things for the next day and one of the things has to be something physical. I also keep a list of friends and family in the back and tick when I have seen them to make sure I don't let friendships pass. It works!

My purpose in life at the moment is revolved around being here for 2 of my GC, while their Mum works and also getting our house finished.

Hilda once you get into that mind set its difficult to shake isn't it I can relate to "Years of artificially overcoming shyness has sometimes made me seem a lot more ballsy than I am." The face we show others is not necessarily the real person. Try to give yourself that push and don't worry I think most people have the same insecurities about doing something new!!

I'm hoping that the purpose of my life will become clear eventually, but perhaps that won't be until it's over!

Haven't a clue about what my purpose is, but I'm enjoying making my life meaningful with family and friends, and I try to keep well enough to be independent and helpful to others. I usually have some new thing on the go to make my life interesting and creative, and this week it's my new toy - sewing machine!

Grannylin great idea to have the note pad. I had one on the go after J died, if only to remind myself what I had done the day before and not to repeat it as my brain had gone to jelly. I think I will start it up again once back from my travels so I have something small but definite to aim for. If I don't achieve the tasks, then I can then be very cross with myself!!

...keep thinking of Catch 22 stuff.....

..and Marvin the paranoid android stuff as well,,,,

Glassortwo, thanks m'dear.

I can't really think of any other purpose for me other than being a good loving partner, mother , mother-in-law ,Granny, and friend. that has made me wonder if I stand out in my own right, but I don'tthink I do. I will just have to settle for that, I'm never going to set the world on fire.

But you do a pretty good golden glow, Golden

I love my family and good friends and I am loved back. Of that I'm sure. That's enough purpose to keep me going!

My purpose it to be a support to everyone. I know that I am not a gogetter in my own right but have always been happy being part of the backroom staff! But, as gracesmum said on another thread, sometimes there seem to be quite a few people looking for support!