Am I becoming a prude?

Dunno. Too busy drooling over Artem's bare chest.

I could think of worse things to look at jingle

Greatnan Absentdaughter and her husband were called into my granddaughter's school and questioned by a social worker because my elder granddaughter was dancing in "an inappropriately provocative manner". Apart from the fact that an "inappropriate manner" is in the eye of the beholder rather than that of a seven-year-old, have these people never seen the videos issued by pop singers such as Christine Aguilera or, as you suggest, in the past Michael Jackson? My daughter and son-in-law were subjected to a lengthy interrogation with questions ranging from whether they walked around naked at home (no) to what was their "drug of choice". Absentdaughter thought it was probably beer but all they cold afford was coffee. (Where do these people come from?) My granddaughter simply loves to dance – when I was staying with the family earlier this year she begged me to teach her some ballet as she knows I used to be a junior ballet teacher. We also all had some jolly times on Friday evenings with a barbecue, music and a bit of a bop.

I wasn't criticising children or their parents - it must be hard to prevent them seeing these videos or TV programmes. I think the school was very stupid to call in a social worker - there are so many programmes now which are supposed to be family entertainment, like My big fat gypsy wedding , where children are shown making very sensual moves in a totally innocent way. My criticism is reserved for the people who make the videos and programmes.

greatnan sorry I didnt reply to your post, the way the young girls dance on Gypsy Wedding seems very provocative but these girls are brought up with strict moral code, the impression I get is that they see all the music videos and imitate the moves and are totally unaware of how it looks.

You are not a prude greatnan - I find these seductive gyrations by pre-pubertal girls quite offensive. They are totally inappropriate. I went to a village school end of term show and their were top form girls (10-11) gyrating in boob tubes - some of the Dads did not know where to look - very embarrassing. I'm on the governors now and would have something to say if it happened again.

I agree, Great nan. It's sexualising children far too soon, they all watch the programme. And what's dancing about anyway? Yes, it's perhaps a way of meeting partners, but primarily it's a life enhancing community cultural experience. It's sad to see it becoming so sexualised.

Bring back country dancing!

When DD2 was in Year 5 at school, and also having riding lessons, she drew 'stick' horses mating in the margin of one of her school jotters. Her teacher was concerned about this and asked me what it was about and whether I was worried. I answered that I thought it was just natural curiosity and that no I wasn't in the least bit worried but rather glad to see that DD was observant. The teacher seemed relieved. She was a newly qualified teacher, probably trained to be on the look out for odd things that might indicate something untoward.

Re your OP, G, I think various forms of dance have always strayed into what some regard as carnality and that's why excessively religious types have often tried to ban it, along with other art forms and activities that give people pleasure. Perhaps you just prefer a more formal type of dancing, which is fine. Can't say lap dancing appeals to me either — not that I've much experience of it, you understand

BTw, I don't (can't – no tv) watch 'Strictly'.

It saddens me to see children behaving in ways that can be perceived as sexualised. It's not their fault - they copy what they see. You're not being prudish Greatnan. I feel the same. I've got a broad mind and I can discuss anything without feeling embarrassed, but sexualised behaviour that gets copied by children is breaching boundaries that should be adhered to for good reasons.

So how many of you are writing to the producers of 'Strictly' and other such programmes?

I was not actually thinking about children - I just found the pelvic thrusting of some of the dancers mildly embarrassing. I love ballroom dancing, including rock and roll and jive. I am the last person in the world to be shocked by other people's sexual activities - I just think they should be carried out in private.

Am I a prude because I get bored with the F word being used as if it were the only adjective in the English language? Or is it just that it was such a dreadful word when I was growing up, even 15 years ago? These days it seems that a book or film or TV programme can't be popular unless that word is liberally used. The thing is, it rubs off on me, and I find myself thinking it and I hate that! I understand that it is just a word that has become very common, but......

I've definitely become a prude as I've got older, I can't stand bad language on TV, chat and comedy shows seem to rely on smuttiness to get a laugh. I know I can always switch it over or off, and often do, but it's most annoying.

When my eldest daughter was about 7, the Headmaster had a 'cough, cough' discreet chat with me. Her teacher was concerned because DD kept saying things like "I'll spank you for that".
You can imagine the chat in the school staffroom! As a teacher myself, I know how exaggerated rumours get in schools!
So, with distinctly uncomfortable Headmaster by my side, and class teacher on the other side, I asked my daughter where she had come across talk of spanking.
I'll never forget their faces when she said "my Enid Blyton books"

My daughters knew all the anatomical names for the parts of the body by the time they started junior school. Some of the other mothers complained to the head that they were using 'dirty talk'.

I don't think I'm a prude - by my standards. I feel the same as when I was teenager. My gran thought the way I dressed / danced was provocative and I thought her a prude. It's the times which have changed!

Greatnan Coming back to your OP, I love ballroom dancing and jive too, and sequence dancing, and I drag a reluctant MrA out at every opportunity - not that either of us have much aptitude for it
There is just something about moving in time to music which seems to satisfy some basic need and I also enjoy watching other people who are much better at it than we are, moving with grace and style.
I have only watched bits of 'Strictly' (I have to confess a weakness for Anton du Beke) but the 'dancing' seems to bear no relation to ballroom dancing as I understand it - they will perform a Foxtrot, for example, to music which is not a foxtrot tempo and isn't even a particularly nice piece of music. I dislike the theatrical aspects of it and like you, find some of it distasteful.
Wikipedia has this in its definition of 'prude':
The name is generally considered a pejorative term to suggest fear and contempt of human sexuality and excessive, unusual modesty stemming out from such a negative view of sexuality
so no, I don't think we're prudes

greatnan I had ythe same problem apropos my son!

On a lighter note I have just remembered a sign in the hall where we used to go for PE, as the school did not have its own hall, which proclaimed:

JITTERBUGGING, JIVING AND IMPROPER DANCING STRICTLY FORBIDDEN

I don't think I'm a prude, but I find that more things make me feel uncomfortable these days.
I don't like the way things are going and I worry for my grandchildren.

I know how you feel. I can remember my grandma saying the same things. I think each new generation has its own set of values, but thankfully there are always some who break the mould and adhere to old fashioned values of respect and morals. I had to catch a bus full of senior school children recently and was expecting to have to stand up all the way home and listen to bad language but to my surprise, as soon as I got on the bus, I was offered a seat. It was noisy, but I know what its like when children have just come out of school. There was no bad language, no references to sexual behaviour and no throwing things at each other. There is hope, I think. I have teenage grandchildren and they don't like the way their peers behave. As adults we have to set examples and sadly a lot of adults choose to set bad ones.

This is an area which desperately needs legislation - see the thread on wearing hijab!

Lilygran What do you mean?