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I don't dread xmas but I don't make it a big deal either.

(18 Posts)
BAnanas Sun 11-Nov-12 19:25:53

janeainsworth, agree about the "Happy Holiday", instead of Merry Christmas, we get cards from Canada with that. I think that Happy Holiday thing may have been around for quite a long time, in the US because I have the Bing Crosby "White Christmas" dvd, much to my husband's disgust, the first one, in black and white circa 1942 in which they sing a Christmas song which has the line Happy Holiday in it. Can't think they were that politically correct back then!

nanaej Sun 11-Nov-12 19:04:33

I love Christmas! It was a special time in my childhood and we have lovely family times. I enjoy the Christmas tree, the pressies and Xmas lunch etc etc. My cake is maturing in a tin and I feed it brandy regularly!
One year ,when in E Africa my brother aged 5 wanted an apple tree for Christmas and my parents spent ages painting a branch and tying apples on it for him!
My one rule is nothing Christmassy happens in the house until 23/24 December and it's all away by 12th night! That's how to keep it special!

janeainsworth Sun 11-Nov-12 18:54:19

BAnanas I know what you mean about round robin letters. It's a personal handwritten one from me, or nothing.
One thing that made me sad when we spent Christmas in the States was that no-one in shops or restaurants is allowed to wish you 'Merry Christmas'.
They have to wish you a 'Happy Holiday'.
I can't quite get my head round the irony of that, it seems so mean spirited that political correctness should obscure the true message of Christmas.

BAnanas Sun 11-Nov-12 16:32:30

It's two days for heaven's sake,in fact possibly one now everything seems to almost go back to normal on Boxing day. I can't stand what seems to be a 4 month build up and can quite see why if you are alone it would depress you. Similarly if you are from a different culture I would understand how Christmas could be viewed as completely over the top. Having said that we have a neighbour across the road from us who is Hindu so celebrates Divali with lights outside his house and is really happy that we have Christmas so he can do the same all over again, his lights are really nice, they make me suffer from "outside light envy" cos we've never got round to getting any. My husband really moans about it, I think it stems from his working life when he said it was almost impossible to get anything done from mid December to early January as most of the companies he dealt with would be on a permanent boozing and party merry go round and then close their offices from Christmas Eve right through to New Year. I think I would prefer the low key approach that I understand continental Europe has, and I wish the religious significance would resonate a bit more here, although I appreciate that not everyone would share that point of view. Retailers of course have to make the most of the frenzied buying fest that seems to get a bit worse every year, but the pressure is so full on I feel sorry for those who feel they have to give into buying their children things they simply cannot afford. Like most who would have been young in the late 1950s early 60s I remember getting things like roller skates, books, board games and perhaps a selection box or two and yes we were all really happy with that. I find the card writing bit a chore but it is sometimes nice to write a letter or two, and receive them from old friends. We used to get a couple of round Robin letters when our kids were young that came over as really smug, I even remember one where the writer actually said "our children continue to make us proud as parents", I didn't know whether to laugh or be sick, or just feel inadequate when I read it. I do like carols nearer the day, Christmas lights and in particular going up to London in December I have found it really pretty particularly walking over Waterloo Bridge and seeing the London skyline lit up. We don't put our Christmas tree up too early we usually do it a week or so before Christmas, which my older son used to moan about because he's the type that would bankrupt himself at Christmas,although he says he wont do that anymore so I live in hopes. I know he will be popping in from time to time from the beginning of December and saying "why isn't the tree up" my younger son couldn't care less whether the tree was there or not. We have succumbed to buying our granddaughter quite a big present as this is the first year she has become aware of Christmas. I don't feel I have to spend as much on our children as we used to. My husband's older granddaughters are all teenagers now so they just want money Personally I'm happy with a good book or two. We do have the usual turkey which I quite like, but I know it's not to everyone's taste as is Christmas pudding which my kids continue to hate so I have to do another type of pudding for them. I'm kind of glad when it's over and we can start planning for things that matter like holidays!

jeni Sat 10-Nov-12 23:13:56

I remember one with DH in hospital. He'd just had his kidney transplant. The kids were young and didn't understand.dd played up and made every body unhappy.
Never want one like that again.

gracesmum Sat 10-Nov-12 23:06:39

Funnily enough one of the "best" Christmases I had was when DH was in hospital - we had hoped he might get out on C Eve, but wasn't well enough. I had made a venison casserole as it would have been a quiet C at best even if he had made it home, so just loaded the car, took dog to kennels and drove down to London where I stayed in youngest D's flat: sisters-IL came up from Kent on C Day, and along with 2 DDs we took smoked salmon sandwiches over to the Royal Free for DH, ate them in the cafeteria with him, then later in the afternoon went back to DD's flat where we had the venison casserole, drank a lot of wine and went to bed. It helped that we knew DH was on the mend, although he had been seriously ill and eldest DD and her then boyfriend (now SIL) had been persuaded not to cancel trip to Australia where he then proposed, but the absence of tree/ cards/ decorations/ fuss was like a breath of fresh air. We knew we possibly had hard times ahead, but just being together was all that mattered. I wish we could recapture that spirit without exactly replicating the circumstances!

nightowl Sat 10-Nov-12 21:41:13

I'm not sure this is the right thread for my post, but I am actually quite looking forward to Christmas this year. For the last twelve years I have worked every Christmas and New Year. I have seen some awful sadness and had to do some terrible things. I have also spent too much as a kind of compensation for not being at home and had unrealistic expectations about having the perfect family time when I could be there. This year, I have finally stopped working shifts and am between jobs, so I will be at home. I intend to give myself permission to enjoy it but am trying hard not to expect too much. Just to be together and safe will be enough.

Love to all of you who are dreading it for one reason or another (or is that the other thread confused )

bikergran Sat 10-Nov-12 21:29:55

I thnk many will be scaling down the posting of Christmas cards this year...due the cost of an extra 60p per card! shock

jeni Sat 10-Nov-12 19:53:01

I don't do cards at all. I can't see why the Royal Mail should profit and the amount charity gets from cards is small. I therefore give gift to a charity instead. Usually the SA. That means it helps homeless people at Xmas!

london Sat 10-Nov-12 19:24:50

frida same hear all the street put cards through the door from just numbers .they dont no who you are so why bother .am not going to do it this year grin but will still have the family for dinner .

FlicketyB Sat 10-Nov-12 18:45:38

I love Christmas for itself. As a child as my father was in the army we were constantly on the move. On my 21st birthday I calculated I had had one 'permanent' address for every year of my life.

As we never knew from one year to the next where we would be, home or abroad, baking or freezing, my father introduced into the family what could best be described as a standard Christmas with traditions and meals that remained unchanged no matter where we were. It was one sure familiar event where everything else, homes and schools was constantly changing.

There was one year when a sudden change of circumstances just before Christmas meant these traditions couldnt be followed. We had a lovely celebratory day but it was always referred to in the famliy 'as the year we didnt have Christmas'.

Even if I was on my own I would run a scaled down version of it for myself and remember all the happy family Christmases I have been so fortunate to experience over my life. Actually, in retrospect I would probably recall a number of the disatrous ones, with all the indulgence of hindsight, thank God they, in each individual distrousness, will not occur again.

BlueSky Sat 10-Nov-12 18:27:32

I've always loved Xmas but yes it is mainly when the kids/grandkids are little, after that it's really no different from any other Sunday. I still make the effort of getting the tree out but that's about all as far as the decorations go. I don't send/receive many cards which luckily can be recycled apart from the one I receive from the DGC. smile

frida Sat 10-Nov-12 16:10:15

I have to admit I quite enjoy the festive season most years but I absoulutley hate Christmas cards! I send as few as possible and ones that I don't like go straight in the bin. Last year there seemed to be a fashion for very small cards about 2"x3", waste of money I think. I live in a street of 25 houses and all the neighbours send each other cards, the family at the opposite end of the street send us a card 'from all at number 6', I don't even know their name and they don't know mine.( I am just as guilty, I send them one 'from the George's at number 24)

Butty Sat 10-Nov-12 15:38:49

I admire your pragmatic take on the whole festival brouhaha B. I dislike the way the media promotes hightened expectations around this time of year - and the marketing involved. Such a money spinner.

Yet I do enjoy making the day just a bit more special than normal, and hold on to doing it my way - with my hopes and expectations for a good and cheerful day. smile

Sook Sat 10-Nov-12 08:28:11

I love the idea of it but hate the reality. It just goes on for far too long and there are lot's of people I would prefer not to see on the day. Well all year round if I'm truthful [bah humbug emoticon]

Ella46 Sat 10-Nov-12 08:06:18

I don't bother either,my children do all the things I used to do for them, and I haven't got the space to accomodate them all even if they were speaking to each other!
It's just another day and soon passes.

I hate turkey!

Greatnan Sat 10-Nov-12 07:43:32

I think many people do the tree/decorations/big dinner things for their children's enjoyment, Bags. I know I did. Now, I don't actually care very much about special days, including my birthday. I have spent many birthdays alone because of my isolated lifestyle, but I usually get a few cards or pms from friends and family.

Bags Sat 10-Nov-12 06:07:35

Anyone else?

There is nothing I feel I have to do for xmas except provide a few presents my kids and grandchild.

So if I can't be bothered, like last year, to get some of the xmas decs out of the loft, so be it.

And if We don't want to eat turkey (or anything else particularly xmassy), which we don't, then so be it.

I refuse to be bullied into making more fuss about the midwinter celebrations than I feel like. Result: except for DD3 getting a bit excited, all remains calm in my house. Further result: not seeing certain people on the day is no big deal. I'm not setting myslef up to feel miserable if xmas day is not much different from another day. Why do people do that?