Anyone else on their own for Christmas?

Hi bikergran Yes, they're my original DM's. I have another 3 pairs in various colours and swap them around to whatever colour I fancy wearing on the day - quite often one green boot and one purple boot - I'm a bit of a weirdy gran

I have spent the day alone, a few tears this morning remembering my DH but that passed. Went for walk across the fields then had my lunch around 4.00. Put on Christmassy DVD's and have got through half a bottle of champagne! , more alcohol than I normally drink in two weeks!! Seeing in-laws tomorrow and going to neighbours for drinks later. This is the second Christmas I have spent alone since DH died - still don't find it easy.

yes love, indeed, to all those who are on their own, or not with the people they love best. Spoke briefly to my DS's Gkds etc in Australia this morning. Hoping for a longer Skype tomorrow to hear all about it.

Goose I love your idea of wearing different coloured Doc Martins! That is style and attitude.

I agree Goose, it has been a very long day.

I have no family here, all of my cousins etc. are in Ireland, not so much as an email from anybody.

Charleygirl and Goose and all those who've had a lonely day

And from me

Thank you. My day was not too lonely- neighbours and friends rang me- it was the lack of family contact by email.

Well the day is nearly over, can't help thoughts of ex & her boyfriend playing happy families, laughing, joking and generally having a good time as we used to do then home to bed. Son & daughter say it may not be like that at all but I know her and she will make sure it is. Oh well, they say there is no fool like an old fool and I guess they are right. Hopefully the new year will bring new opportunity and state of mind. I am amazed at the apparent number of people alone on Christmas day, it should not be in this day and age and although I never see or speak to anyone from one day to the next I consider myself fortunate to have received a phone call from son, email from daughter, an email from daughters ex husband and a PM from a member on GN. Other than that total isolation and locked away in the house.
Watching an episone of Vicar of Dibley, again, on BBC1 before bed so here's wishing all a very peaceful night and better day tomorrow. Goodnight.

Ps when Ex-DH left me and I had to share the kids on Christmas day I used to upset myself imaging them playing happy families with my children! In recent years I have seen more of them and realised he is just as obnoxious with her as he was with me. Thinking of you and everybody who is alone

Yesterday spent on own with mobile to hand, without a text or email from daughter(s) - still hurting today, I just want to (metaphorically) lash out at them for their total selfishness - Yes, I know it's 'not the answer' but I can't help how I feel and I'm just being honest

know how you feel goose and how much it hurts...one day they will be in the same position as us and know how much it hurts...sending you hugs xxxx

Goose were you not tempted to text/email your daughters?

Many years' ago I was estranged from my sister for about six months, due to my now ex-husband's unreasonable behaviour. One day I just had to pick up the phone and make the first move.

your not a fool ps just a victim of circumstance...i know what its like not seeing anyone for days it can be really suffocating but we have to pull ourselves out of it and get on with our life the best we can....thinking of you... xx

ps hugs

Goose I think I would phone them today and during the conversation mention that you had hoped to get a text or some contact. These things usually stem from thoughtlessness. Hope you have a better day today. Best wishes for 2014 ps and well done for getting through a difficult day.

dollie & Kate - thank you, you are too kind.
Goose I am so sorry, you must feel dejected and neglected. Let's hope your daughters are never in the same position or subjected to the hurt you must be feeling. Sadly younger ones tend to get wrapped up in their own whirlwind lives and forget the really important people in their lives. I would suggest you must somehow let them know how you feel as they just may be forthcoming with a reason why they act as they do and do not feel they need to make contact. Just a thought. In any event do come here for any contact you feel you need, as Liz has suggested it may just be thoughtlessness.

Goose, Do you ring her?

Two of my children lived fairly near, and contact me about once every week or two (not religiously) to keep updated. My older daughter lives at the other end of the country, and hardly ever phones me, so I phone her every 3 or 4 weeks at a time when I think she wil not be up to the eyes in children, work, sport, and socialising with friends. We sometimes talk for an hour, on every subject under the sun, and at the end of it we ring off with her saying she will phone me next time, yes really. I reply that I will believe it when I hear it, we both laugh and that is that. We enjoy the contact, and I never ever criticise her - I know that they have many friends, the children have busy lives and have to be delivered here and there, she has a house to run, a job to go to and a life to lead.

I came home late yesterday evening from a Christmas meal with the other two parts of the family. As I sat on my own, she rang me and we talked for ages. She had spent an enjoyable but hectic day with inlaws but found pleasure in ringing me too.

If I had been critical in the past, and piled on the guilt for not phoning, she would see it as a duty and a penance, and interrupted her own fun saying "I must go and phone Mum or she will be miserable".

Whenever my parents used to visit my grandmother, she would comment on how long it had been since we had last been there, "Haven't seen you for a fortnight/week/whatever!", which did not make it a pleasant experience. I swore then that I would make my children want to contact me, not fear my comments if they did not.

You are wise one, Elegran.

Goose love the idea of odd colours of boots thought that I was being brave wearing odd socks!! lol I have perhaps I may throw caution to the wind and one day buy myself a lovely comfy pair !

Goose Perhaps you should start a nautical range of DM's with Port & Starboard (Red & Green) it will certainly beat L&R (Left & Right).

Elegran, I agree with what you are saying. Guilt tripping DC can lead to duty calls or visits and this is not ideal. I hardly hear from DD but she has a very busy life, I know where she is and if I need her I just e-mail or write a line on facebook.

Elegran I could have written your post. I've always stressed to my dd and ds that I love hearing from them and I know how busy they are. I'm always cheerful when they ring (I have caller display) and it's now paying dividends!

Thank goodness!!!

Yes, I did try contacting the girls, but phone's were switched off yesterday.
Things are better today as one of them remembered to pop in to see me for an hour on her way home from three days with her father and sisters, which was nice and far better than nothing. I think you're right about 'younger ones' having a total different philosophy regards keeping in touch. Mine seem to spend half their lives with their finger's/mind/eyes glued to some little gadget, keeping in touch with friends, but when it comes to keeping in touch with their mum - well, it doesn't seem to matter. Must be a generation thing

I do phone them once a fortnight and keep in touch via email. Problem is I'm of the 'old school' and respond to emails the next day, if not straight away (I always did with written letters years ago) but now I have to wait weeks until I get a response to any emails I send them - and I can't get used to it - it's a lesson on the lines of 'mind the gap' - there's always a chasm between my sending and receiving replies, enough time for me to build up a paranoia mountain - 'did I say something wrong?' (if so, what???).
bikergran I find DM's very comfortable and I've always been unconventional, I'm described as Bohemianan, so am inclined to ignore other's reactions, which can be diverse and hurtful at times. I also have two (small) tattoos and pink hair. I might get evicted from GN for this confession