Who cares about becoming invisible?

I always wanted a sister too Galen but I got two younger brothers. I have a slightly dotty SiL who is the nearest thing I have to a sister.

Lots of friends on GN though.

I can raise both eyebrows independently but only one side of the top lip (as in Elvis Presley). I bet you're all trying it now!

Same here!

I can turn my tongue sideways in my mouth. a friend of mine took her car for a recall repair and they saw a rats nest in her motor somewhere I didn't ask for details,anyway she asked them to remove it and they told her no and the rat was probably somewhere in her car! I told her if she was 40 years younger those men would of been happy to help her.I remember being young and never having to wait long to get help with a flat tire. a speeding ticket? Nope! Just smile!

I can waggle my ears AND curl my tongue into a tube. But I hadn't realised it got me noticed. Next time someone lets a door go in my face I'll waggle my ears at them!

Perhaps the curled tongue will work better.

Such talents!
Not struck by images of older women in underwear or trying to look 40 years younger I have to say.
I think part of the issue is personality - some people really want to be noticed at all their ages and some really don't want to be noticed, with all shades in between. If you are a want to be noticed personality you will probably carry on making an effort in that direction. If not, you may welcome the opportunity to attract less attention.
There is also the issue of work, and what kind of image you seek to present.
Most of the time (and working from home) I wear "outdoor" clothing but I have started wearing red shades of lipstick. If I want to be noticed I would wear an unusual jacket and the full-on version of red lipstick. Does make you look like you want to be noticed.

When on my scooter I wear a red leather jacket!
I'm still invisible!

With all this gurning especially in red lipstick I wonder how anybody could even suggest we risk becoming invisible.

Thank you for responding LizG
I really can't relate to any of that. Is it about how you see yourself? How you as an individual interact with other people? I don't know, but things like encountering rude queue-jumpers have happened at different times in my life, and I've had people at bars talk and order over my head (not difficult as I'm 5ft nothing) when I was in my 20s, 30s, 40s as well as 50s and 60s. My response to such rudeness is no different now than it was when I was younger!
I don't expect to put up with rude inconsiderate people but I never have. I certainly don't attribute it to being older or 'invisible'. Surely it is all just in one's own perspective? If you feel invisible, stop allowing yourself to feel invisible!

Well put NannaAnna. It's similar to the thread about not acting one's age. I do what I do at whatever age.

Liz, most of those things happen to people of all ages. I think it is just many older people become sensitised to expecting to be ignored so make more of things that we shrugged off when we were younger.

I have always thought, and still do, that the period when it is most assumed that women have the IQ of a pea and are most patronised is when they are pregnant and in the very early year or so of child rearing. Things only go up hill from there.

Like Absent I have a voice - and I use it. And while, like most people, there are times when I am intimidated by public expectations and conform. I was fortunate to discover very young that I was considered an oddity with eccentric views and it didn't really bother me so I have, generally, ploughed my own course without recourse to role models.

I can't see anything to admire in the sixty-two year old underwear model. Sixtytwo is not very old, and the pictures will most certainly have been airbrushed. When you have purple mottling on your feet and ankles, there is no way your legs are going to be completely unblemished like that. Good luck to her though. She's in a job she enjoys, and makes, no doubt, good money doing it.

The hundred and two year old cyclist, I have HUGE respect for! Well done mate!

I do find I need role models but I'm inclined to look for them in my own family. Especially my granny.

I still think the invisibility thing is horrible. I never know whether to fight it, or just let it go. #isitworthit

The best thing is to laugh at it.

You all make excellent points and there are a number with which I would agree. I still feel though that I am invisible. I think it really came to a head with the empty nest syndrome (another thread) and more especially OH's retirement. It was certainly when I became more aware of the problem. Ah well, back to the books on assertiveness

jings...when we think that you're invisible we panic and send out a search party.

LizG, you are not invisible on gransnet. I enjoy reading your comments. Always glad to see your name in the Active threads list .

LizG

Not sure about the role model thing. It could actually put too much pressure on people and give the message that it's not enough to be 'good enough'; to be worth something you have to excel or become famous. I've found that attitude in portrayals of disabled people who become well-known. It becomes, or COULD become, another guilt thing; unless I am like them, unless I achieve excellence, I am not worthy.
Whilst I think it's great for those concerned to have done well in their chosen activity, it shouldn't be hailed as another 'you-see-what-can-be-done-if-you-put-your-mind-to-it' lesson. What we all need is to realise that it's actually OK to be yourself, warts and all, ordinary or extra-ordinary; I am still fighting to learn that, aged 60, and find it all too easy to compare myself unfavourably to others. It's not a habit of which I am proud.

So I try not to look to role models - if I wanted one, I'd think of my own father, who at age 87, still travels extensively, goes to the gym every week, gardens, attends theatres, visits art galleries and lives life at a pace which leaves me feeling VERY humble and inadequate! Also my mother-in-law, widowed a few years ago but still keeping up walking, cooking, going out and generally being far more positive than I am (even though she constantly annoys me and other family members with her critical and judgemental attitude). But they both put me to shame.

My role models are people like Beth Chatto who worked incredibly hard to achieve her goals despite having to support family members with life limiting conditions. Although Beth is one of the most respected horticulturalists of our time she has always avoided the celebrity limelight. Her wonderful gardens are an inspiration.

soop I still can't get on here on my Kindle Fire! I'm sure I might vanish at any moment!

Sorry for thread hijck. As you were.

Merlotgran- I admire Beth Chatto too, though I don't know much about her (I've visited her beautiful garden many times - it's awe-inspiring). I feel the same about many gardeners though, both dead and living, who have left such a wonderful legacy for all. Geoff Hamilton springs to mind...Christopher Lloyd...I could go on....

Being older is not a "role" - the point is that we are diverse human beings, like any other age group is allowed to be and would like to be treated as such. And spare us the endless airbrushed photos of older women on the covers of certain magazines. Mirren airbrushed to look 25 etc. etc
It is interesting to see that someone can cycle so well at 100 - but that is almost a medical story - look how long the well-exercised human body can continue to function well (with luck and a lot of dogged persistence) - so don't assume that others in their 60s, 70s etc cannot take exercise and keep fit. But it would be ludicrous to think that we should all aspire to such athleticism, any more than we should all aspire to look like Mirren.
Wear bright clothes in shades that suit you if you want to be noticed, not blacks and neutrals. And use a spot of makeup to brighten up fading features.

Nope! Makeup or clothing doesn't help jess. I always make myself look a bit nice when we go out, but it's always DD who gets thanked. Even if I'm the one paying!

Happened at the pub yesterday!