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(78 Posts)
janeainsworth Wed 12-Nov-14 22:54:57

"Arguing with engineers is like wrestling with pigs in mud. After 3 hours, you realise they are actually enjoying it."

Anyone else married to one?
Engineer, that is wink

alex57currie Wed 12-Nov-14 23:07:46

Yes me. He thinks I'm even below having him critcise me. He also asks if there's a picture of me in the dictionary next to the word stupid. I think it's hilarious.grin

Tegan Wed 12-Nov-14 23:18:34

I WAS married to one. Everything was in black and white; no grey areas. He spent the whole of our marriage looking for fault in everything I did sad.

absent Wed 12-Nov-14 23:34:36

Both Mr absent and my son-in-law are in engineering. They are both classic examples of "The glass is not half empty; the glass is not half full. It is the wrong size glass."

Coolgran65 Thu 13-Nov-14 00:46:56

I was .married to a civil engineer.......enough said !!

J52 Thu 13-Nov-14 07:19:50

My dad was one. Very precise - to the nearest Thou. ( engineers will get the joke. It's non metric! ) x

soontobe Thu 13-Nov-14 08:01:00

Is there an engineer joke book?
I like the sound of it.
I dont even know an engineer.

pompa Thu 13-Nov-14 08:19:28

I'm an engineer, and still passionate about engineering.
"Arguing with engineers is like wrestling with pigs in mud. After 3 hours, you realise they are actually enjoying it."

"The glass is not half empty; the glass is not half full. It is the wrong size glass."

I can definitely see myself in these statements.

Problems are made to be solved.

Todays problem - find an engineers joke book.

janeainsworth Thu 13-Nov-14 08:34:52

Love it Absent grin
In my experience the most challenging engineers are those who are also involved in project management, as they take a particular delight in not only being right about everything, but also directing, delegating and adhering to the 'critical path'.
This is particularly irritating when the task they have taken it upon themselves to manage is completely outwith their area of expertise, like cooking dinner or making curtains.

Re jokes - pompa I'm sure you are familiar with the one about the Mushroom Society which all engineers belong to - because they're kept in the dark and covered in sh*t.

alex57currie Thu 13-Nov-14 08:53:50

Mike Scuh's collection of engineer-mathematician-physicist jokes. Just google it.

Anne58 Thu 13-Nov-14 09:29:22

Mr P is an engineer, but specialises in one sector. Perhaps he is the exception to the rule, because he is the least argumentative person I know!

However, most types of DIY undertakings, even making a set of shelves, a new fence etc are meticulously planned, with detailed drawings etc. No scribble on the back of a metaphorical fag packet for him!

jinglbellsfrocks Thu 13-Nov-14 09:51:53

Oh pompa. You sound just like my DH. And he's into model aeroplanes! And yes, he's an engineer. hmm grin

Elegran Thu 13-Nov-14 09:52:14

Mr E was not one to argue either.

He was an electrical engineer, on the design side, with an interest in all the house-building trades. Every homer he undertook was done like Mr P's - spread sheets, diagrams, calculations. I still have his files on every DIY job he did on the house, from shelves to a complete kitchen (he demolished walls and rebuilt them, did joinery, plastering, plumbing, tiling, electrics, installed units, the lot. (I decorated and fetched the tools as he needed them)

jinglbellsfrocks Thu 13-Nov-14 09:58:22

"Problems are made to be solved"

Round here that interprets into "don't throw it away yet. I can probably fix it". And yes, he will fix it - there will most likely be a bloody great bolt involved somewhere, the finished article will look like a spare part from an old submarine or german tank, but it will work. And I will throw it out. And buy a new one.

Does that sound familiar to Mrs P? hmm

merlotgran Thu 13-Nov-14 10:02:32

I thank my lucky stars I'm married to an agricultural engineer. Saved us a small fortune over the years in car maintenance/repairs, plumbing, building maintenance, general DIY etc.

He lives in his workshop and can be a grumpy old git if anyone disagrees with him. He's usually right but I never tell him that wink

jinglbellsfrocks Thu 13-Nov-14 10:04:44

Wow! They are all alike!

Elegran Thu 13-Nov-14 10:05:04

That is if it ever does get fixed, Jingl. I still have a cellar full of the things which were going to be repaired - sometime.

Teetime Thu 13-Nov-14 10:10:22

I love engineers. We have known several as neighbours and friends and they are always fixing stuff and they earn a fortune!!! That should get you going.

merlotgran Thu 13-Nov-14 10:11:34

Wish mine had earned a fortune hmm

Elegran Thu 13-Nov-14 10:17:05

Or mine.

Anne58 Thu 13-Nov-14 10:19:08

Mr P has to live away during the week, and he still doesn't earn a fortune!

gillybob Thu 13-Nov-14 10:29:05

I know exactly what you mean janeainsworth Mr is an Electrical Engineer. Infact I eat, breath and sleep (or rather don't) engineering.

What irritates me the most (among many other things) is his ability to overthink and over analyse everything and not to recognize when he is boring someone to tears zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

grin absent

Wish mine had too merlot I would be out shopping instead of writing quotes and collecting overdue accounts.

gillybob Thu 13-Nov-14 10:31:51

Mind you on the positive side like merlot said earlier, mine too can fix almost anything if he has the time.

Tegan Thu 13-Nov-14 10:40:01

Dilbert Books? My ex used to buy them. I never owned anything new cause he used to fix everything. My kids used to be ashamed to be seen in the cars we used to drive. He even put a new engine in a Chrysler Alpine to keep it going for a few more years. I was the laughing stock of the car parts shop when I told them [having gone there to get more bits for it] blush....

Anne58 Thu 13-Nov-14 10:44:37

Mr P's speciality is drainage. Thank God he doesn't bring his work home with him! grin

He is currently working on surface water and highways drainage for a County Council, he previously worked on the flood plains project for Somerset.

He does do "foul" as well, which strikes me as odd. Ask him to empty the cat litter tray, and he suddenly has an urgent appointment elsewhere, but show him an overflowing drain with turds and tampons bobbing about in it, and he's like a pig in the proverbial! confused