Mrs, Miss or Ms

I like being a Mrs. I don't feel defined by my marital status. I like being my husband's wife.

I see Night owl,Judge mental means disagreeing.
Didn't realise that.

No Marmark it doesn't mean disagreeing. It means what Farnorth said in her post at 16.56 today. Your first posts on this thread were insulting to men and to women. On the other hand, I can't see where anyone has judged you.

I don't care what title anyone chooses for themselves, but I do object to being labelled 'an insecure radical feminist who feels inferior to men' or words to that effect just because I choose to use Ms. That is not disagreeing with someone, it's being very rude to someone.

So 'silly little insecure radical feminist' isn't judgemental?

Does it matter what we're called as long as we're happy with it? Some people like Miss. Others Ms and others Mrs.

Between marriages I was a Ms. I didn't feel like a Miss because I'd been married but I didn't want to stay a Mrs. Now I'm remarried I'm a Mrs again.

Each to her own.

No, VQ, it doesn't matter. And it's nobody else's business either.

Well, that's the OP told...

Agreed on the private level- but can see how discriminatory it is on the professional and institutional level.

I am happy to be MRS, abd happy and proud to be his wife. He is happy to be my husband- so all is fine. If he applies for a job, or becomes active politcally, his marital status is irrelevant and not stated- mine is. That's fine by me- but it is discriminatory. Stating this does NOT make me a 'silly little insecure radical feminist' - at all.

Ah well, if the cap fits.
At least I'm secure and confident enough to stand by what I've said.
A couple of you are so uptight and indignant I must be right.
Keep up the fight.
Me,I'm going to snuggle up to my MAN and watch ,Life of Pi.
Incidentally,would you ALL like me to leave Gransnet.Or just some of you.

I'm not bothered either way, Marmark1

I don't want you to leave gransnet Marmark. What a strange thing to say.

No uptight or indignant here, just don't happen to agree with you on this subject. There may be others where we would agree. That's the beauty of gransnet as you will discover if you stick around. It's not life or death, just a discussion forum!

Granjura it is illegal in this country for employers to discriminate against someone because of their gender and by implication, their marital status.
So it doesn't matter what anyone chooses as their title, if any.

Ms on every official form and bank account, ever since I was old enough to need one.

Most of the time now I use no title at all.

I think Mrs. hearkens back to times when women were supposed to be delighted to have 'caught' a male. They could then think they were better than their unmarried peers. So many women now don't even take the husband's/partner's surname, let alone use a title.

I thought it was grossly unfair that there was no way by which you could tell whether some male you met at a nightclub was married or not, whereas you were supposed to be known by your married title. Although in my ignorance, I always thought that being married would protect me from the attentions of married men. I was very wrong!

jane, I am sorry, but having worked in senior management in the uk for so long- I know what the law says, and the reality on the ground, can be very different. I'm sure you do too. So many ways of getting around the law.
But the UK is indeed way ahead in this field, not the case in many European countries.

I am Mrs, but I don't require anybody to address me as Mrs, either when they're are talking to me or writing to me. I do object to Ms and I get really cross if it is forced upon me.
In fact I don't see the need to address me with a title at all, just call me Sarah.

This must be personal choice IMO. I am proud to be married to Mr. Pud (43 year) so like being called Mrs. I don't feel demeaned by it in any way. But if some people prefer to use Ms. what is the problem?

I can see why in some situations the fact that men are not defined by their title could be annoying. I admit I hadn't thought about it that way.

It is personal choice of course.

Marmark1 disagreeing is not a problem but I do think some of your posts are a little smug...e.g. your post at 19.08.12

We disagree on here all the time, but we do try not to insult one another (most of the time)

I have noticed that those who are most quick to be scathing are usually also very quick to think that they are being unfairly got at.

I can't see why we need a title. I can't remember the last time I needed one.
Children in school are about the only necessity. Even the doctor calls me in by first name surname.

What titles do children in school need?

Oh, I see, you're saying children should use a title for their teachers.

So when they start work they should be able to call their boss by his or her first name?

I know some workplaces are quite relaxed about such matters now... wouldn't have happened in my day

One of my first jobs was at a family firm. The four family members who were directors all had the same surname, so we got to call them by their first names...preceded by Mr.

50 years ago I was so proud to become Mrs and prove that I could get married. It also meant a new surname having always had to spell my birth name. I hadn't reckoned with the inability of local people to understand a name beginning with H - not a sound used here - so I have to spell my 4 letter surname. When he cleared off I kept the Mrs because I felt that was what I was. I think Ms is horrid.
If you want to revert to your maiden name there is a cost as it has to be done by deed poll.

Marmark1 its nice to know you are so smug secure and confident.
Stay or go, I don't expect anyone's bothered.