The Gransnet Olympics !

I shall be a leading contender in the 'Senokot sprint'. I advise entrants not to take a sleeping pill on the same night that they take the laxative tablet, or they may get off to a slow fart start

Jalima on the 26 mile walk, it will be a leisurely stroll, sampling the local food and also stopping frequently for a coffee. As we will be walking 1/2 mile a day, provided it is not too hot and humid, it will be enjoyable having frequent breaks. If we get tired, I am sure we could pick up a local taxi.

I do not know what language they speak there but I could order food, drink, taxis etc in Spanish if that is of any help? We would not starve and I do not nag.

Greyduster I wonder if I could recruit you for the getting the lid shut on the wheely-bin team that I'm a member of? (Our dustmen won't collect unless the lid is neatly closed). You've clearly been in training with your suitcase, and it's not too many people can jump high enough to force the lid down successfully on a heavingly overfilled bin.

NonnaW can I join you but I will do opening strap buckle thingy to get them out

Surely we could put a team together for the Pelvic Floor exercises?

Walking while reading.

Well it is the morning after the night before. We represented GN well in the Opening Ceremony however about 5 of our members did not return to base, I suspect they are still wandering around the stadium. I want to start a search party. Anyone up for looking for confused old folk not knowing where the heck they are ?

Not avoid idea Kate, we could lose more than way. I suggest we lay a trail of Poldark lookalikes to lead them back.

Avoid a good.

I could be in the team for forgetting to proof read.

What a good idea Kitty perhaps you could be in charge as I am busy topping up my tan on the beach.

Are you still up for the egg, spoon, and soldiers race this afternoon ?

Can I be the sand raker at the long jump. I do like things tidy?

If I don't manage to qualify in the " now that I am down here (on the floor) what else can I do" event I would like to be a spectator please as these sound far more entertaining than the official Games!

It's the final of the anti-clockwise coffee stirring competition this afternoon and I am a bit worried by the Italian Baristas team - they look mighty well prepared to me. I can only do my best and they do say it's about the taking part not the winning.

Nankate, sorry I didn't get back, found these nice Brazilian ladies in bikinis and thought it would help International relations if I helped them with their English. I always wondered what a "Brazilian" was.
Wandering around looking for the bewildered old farts race atm.

Love this thread.

How about a 'getting slower and slower at doing everything' race? It's a bit like Pointless on tv. The winner is the slowest.

Or a 'putting trousers on without falling over' event?

G&T you are not supposed to wonder what a Brazilian is.....

Great, I found the bewildered old farts race, all gathered together --- oops, oh! no it's not, it's the International Olympic Committee, my mistake.

Catching cat (preferably poo covered cat) dunking in Bath and emerging clean as a whistle contest

Oh dear did I miss the opening ceremony? So sorry it was in my diary but actually I thought it was today and yesterday was the day before. Can we do a repeat tomorrow? Has anyone dropped out of procrastination yet? If not can I enter a new event- Magnum eating???

Oh, Jalima, I've entered the Return To The House To Collect Stuff I've Forgotten event at local level several years running. Am heartened to learn that I can now enter at Olympic level ?

Trisha you should have entered the "Yesterday was the day before the day I though today was tomorrow race" But fortunately you have missed the start which was tomorrow.

GrandTea - naughty! But very good ?

Trisha that's all right, you can still enter yesterday.

My OH wants to enter the Coffin Dodgers event - personally I think it is too late for him

Opening ceremony, what opening ceremony? - did I miss something?

I think they speak Portuguese in Brazil, Charleygirl, we may go hungry