Matriarchal family or not?

Matriarchal families?

No, I have thought about this and we are not. However, none of the women in the family are 'pushovers' or 'doormats', all are strong-willed and quite independent, but I think we chose strong-willed men as partners too, so there are inevitable clashes. I don't have a sister for comparison though.
Oh, sometimes I long for an easy-going man like my DB.

Not sure really, my sister and I would fit the bill I think, but then my brother would too.
My late mum, most definitely not.

No men in charge in my family, one did try but in the end was binned . Can imagine the chaos if things like bills/money was left to most men? (I know there are exceptions) keeping track of birthdays, anniversaries/Christmas? My Grandads were lovely but Grannys were defo in charge.

We just manage to be in charge without them realising it

Meant to add that I don't have any daughters.....

DH has never got the hang of 'Yes Dear'

This is not me and my late DH, nor my sons partners, but it is my parents, my brother and his wife and their son and his wife.

Matriarchy takes many forms. My DF was a strong and decisive man, and at times an autocratic father, but he doted on my mother, and as a father of three girls, most decisions about the conduct of the household and our upbringing was left to her.

DH is certainly not one of those easy going men who recognise that they get an easier life by letting their wives rule the roost., but he has no strong views on how the house is run and had a job that took him away from home a lot, often at short notice with no known date for his return, so inevitably, I became the home and household manager.

I think I grew up in a matriarchal household. My father held the purse strings but other than that never seemed to have much of a say in anything else. The only other matriarchy I have experience of was my sister's household, in that she was the only woman in a household with six men. My brother in law saw his role as purely that of breadwinner and provider and maintainer of the bricks and mortar. She provided all the physical and emotional sustenance to her five boys. When she died, it was as if they had been completely cast adrift and the whole family practically fell apart.

Myself and my three daughters are all what I would call strong women. We have our own opinions and ways of doing things. We are happy to discuss things and adapt our views. I don't think any of us would just bow to a man just because he is a man. I certainly hope not !

Yes my grandmothers both.
Then my mother.
My mum's sister was unhappily
married to a control freak for nearly thirty years.
She now is very happily married to easy going,cheerful man.
My sister and I also fit the matriarchal type
And now I would say my daughter does.
We all have/are happily married, we just provide the physical and emotional support as Ginny mentioned

My dear old Uncle always says, if you don't have arguments in a relationship, someone is under the thumb. I'm all for equality without one or the other being in control but both being strong when the need arises.

I too have 3 daughters and all are pretty strong willed. I often wondered what kind of men they'd marry and I did worry about it. However the men they found were a foil for each of them. They are neither too soft or too hard. They all balance each other and there is no power struggles. I feel extremely blessed and relieved that I have 3 wonderful sons in law.

No, we are not as far as I can see. Most of the marriages I looked at are equal partners. In fact with all my three sons their wives insist on a discussion over most things. They come to a decision after talking things over together and they share everything to housework, looking after their children and sorting out finances.

In my house it is different. OH does most of the finance and jobs around the house, we share shopping and gardening and I looked after the children and do the housework, OH does the cooking, now also I look after the grandchildren. OH loves to play with them too so we both have fun. We share most things when it comes to deciding where to go for holidays or days out. I used to have a car but gave it up when I retired, no point in having two with all the expense for it to sit on the driveway. I also have my own bank account. Works for us.

In OH's family they have a Matriarch who has to know everything and expects to be informed before everyone else. I get quite irritated about it. She thinks she is the wise old woman who knows the answers to everything, which of course, being in her eighties she doesn't. We just humour her.

My mum definitely isn't matriarchal. I on the other hand am very strong and have yet to find a man to match me! My daughter is also very strong willed as is my granddaughter. When the 3 of us spend any great amount of time together there are often fireworks!

I prefer a more equal marriage myself - which is what I have. We work together making decisions and talk about things which matter to us most. We like to include each other in our thoughts.

The matriarchs I have met (now dead) were in an elevated position because they had their hands firmly on the dosh. They said, 'Jump' and the family answered, 'How high?'

Cue the family fall-outs when the old battle-axe head of the clan popped her clogs.

Has anyone watched A Place to Call Home? An Australian soap, I think it is on British tv at the moment.

Elizabeth Bligh (played by the wonderful Noni Hazlehurst) is my idea of a typical matriarch!

My mother and I both held/hold the purse strings on a day to day basis but big spends would be discussed. Mum ran the house and my brother and I Our house is similar. H is laid back and easy going. He is happy to let me plan and decide on holidays etc.
I sometimes wish it were different. A friend left her easy going husband for what she called her "more manly" lover. It lasted a year !

Yes, l love it Jalima
Elizabeth has agreed to step back now though and let George run the family but in her day she was definitely a matriarch

I haven't watched it in the UK because I got confused about where it had got to but I have recorded it.
Obviously it must have gone past where Elizabeth was laying down the law about who should marry whom!
I must have a catch-up.

There has been a mixture in my family. My mum was the ruler of the roost in a general way but it was always my dear old quiet Dad who stepped up in a crisis. In the main the women are strong but know when to rein it in.
I prefer more of a partnership that shares, and can't stand bullies or controllers of either sex.

What I would like to know is - how do some women always, always get their own way? Everything they want in the house at whatever cost, husbands who smilingly jump when they say 'jump' or decorate when they say 'decorate'!

I have never managed it

That's because they are married to wimps easy going men Jalima

A mixture in our family, our DS and DD's are all the strong character in their marriages, in my own, we are about equal, but DH usually manages the last word on a decision.in any relationship, marriage/ friends etc there is always going to be one that leads and another who follows, to a greater or lesser degree, that's what makes it a success really.