No friends

This thread has made me feel so good, I thought I was the only one with no friends and that there must be something wrong with me. My Sister was my best friend but unfortunately she passed away in January and now I feel lost, I have no-one to confide in or ask advice from or just sit and chat with a coffee. I have been divorced for 30 yrs now and all the friends I had when I was married very quickly fell away. I'm not one that enjoys going to groups etc. I have my cross stitching, sewing and jigsaws and my grandchildren to keep me busy, but sometimes you just need that special person to talk to.

So difficult to admit to yourself that you're lonely isn't it? I have a friend from school, we meet up once a year and that's it. I have no local friends, I've lived where I live now for about 15 years and hardly know anyone. I have my DH and we travel round in our motorhome and basically still keep to ourselves. we have a very large family and often think if we were to die in our sleep they'd never notice, well that is until they needed us to babysit. Just had a thought, is there a Grandad's Net? Maybe that's the answer to have a Gran and Grandad's Net for helping all the lonely people to meet up, have online chats and maybe make new relationships.

I think gransnet does do local meets, if you check on the forum. Sure someone else can guide you better. I would also recommend meetup. Through this, I've met a wonderful group of women, all ages and nationalities.
Meetup has so many different options of interests. Not expensive either.
Also hear university of third age is good. One just been set up near me, which I'm going to check out.

Thank you silverlining48, would love to join you but unfortunately I will be at work, but will bear you in mind for the future!x

I don't think I've ever had what I call a true friend - to me that is someone I can tell anything to and there it stops - but I've been caught out so many times, so called friends talking behind my back and then it eventually gets back to me. So now I find I can't trust anyone and so I don't have my longed for friend, so remain a loner.

I have a mix of friends that I have known for many years and friends made in the last few years since moving. Made through the local WI.

I never really had close friends when I worked, usual busy home life & family. When DH & I moved to Somerset we made some new friends, one in particular I'm in regular contact with (phone). She is probably my closest friend but is now 70 miles away from where I now live in South Devon (almost Dartmoor).

I moved just over 2 years ago after being widowed, I am near my DD & DGSs. I have had to make new friends, my neighbours are lovely & very friendly.

I have joined a couple of Meet Up groups & enjoy going out, being able to choose which outings I go on. I do intend to join WI as well.

I am an only child, brought up in the country with few friends around, this has made me independent & quite self-sufficient. I love reading, crosswords & sudoku. I can fill my time very easily, I love gardening. I do enjoy company & sharing outings with other people but equally can enjoy my own company, I do go out & about on my own.

Find your local U3a

www.u3a.org.uk/find-a-u3a.html

Sparkle 199, i mentioned earlier in this post that we have a meet up arranged in bluewater this thursday 11.30 in waterstones cafe. You are just over the bridge so if you can make it you are very welcome.

Having read most of this interesting thread, I think that we mustn't feel 'odd'. Probably our mothers had this coffee morning/chatting for hours outside the butchers thing in the 1950s and 1960s because their careers weren't taken particularly seriously after the kids came along. Secondly I think we've moved geographically a lot more than previous generations. We are also the NHS generation, physically in better condition than previous generations, and probably more used to travelling, more mobile. Retirement comes as a massive shock to the system. Let's just get out there and find out what others are doing. And let's join them if we can. (And thank goodness for the internet)

Hi Bettyboo22 and everyone else, this thread strikes a chord with me too! I am in need of friends, and like someone said I have a friend who I meet up with, but although she's not boastful she has a lovely life and I come away feeling more down st times!
I would love to meet up with you Bettyboo22 and anyone else near me, anyone in Hornchurch, upminster or Romgord area? Perhaps we can set up our own little coffee club or afternoon tea club? Anyone fancy it? X

Salvia I'm in St Albans but happy to drive to meet, charleygirl in Harrow she has a meet up there I believe is monthly, maybe we could tag along sometime.

South East Cheshire. I just emailed a not so local NWR group.

I agree with Gillybob and some of the others.I belong to a local group of the National Trust,I volunteer for Age UK and go to a dance/exercise class.I've met a lot of new people I can call friends,but I don't see them outside of these groups.My husband lives in a care home now,in the old days we always just went places together,I've never been one for going about with groups of women.I can relate to Gillybob,I sometimes don't feel confident mixing with people,especially if they've had good careers,I always just did shop work.We shouldn't put ourselves down too much,I've built a life for myself,I have family to spend time with too.I go out by myself as well,it can be quite nice just to please myself where I go,we can't all be life and soul of the party,perhaps we shouldn't worry.

I haven't read all the messages but I'm sure someone else will have suggested U3A. As a chair of my local U3A I heard so many times how joining had helped people who were lonely and saw first hand many new friendships formed. There shoul be one nearby, give it a try. You won't regret it, just take that first step.

Hi yes I'm on Facebook and have connected with school friend
But no real friend who wants you about

I also feel like this. I am due out tonight so can't hang around just now and I will catch up when I have read this thread.

How refreshing it has been to read this thread! I have long felt that there's something wrong with me as I too have very few (2 at best) close friends, loads of acquaintances from WI, Pilates, U3A (lapsed), but I have no idea how to change acquaintances into friends. I always feel as if I am on the outside looking in which can be quite uncomfortable. I am sure some of it stems from being an only child, and I do admit to having a very sharp sense of humour along with finding it hard to wind my neck in at times ?. I am in Gloucestershire

I worry that I don't have many. My best friend died 9 years ago. We moved areas and that was a real struggle. Moved back to near where we used to live but only have one close friend near me. Did join a Meetup group but they started meeting more at the weekends and as I work full time and am married didn't want to leave husband to meet up. I think it's harder making real friends when you ar older.

I try to go out and have recently joined the u3a and go to a couple of their groups,but I doubt any friendships will follow. I am a quiet person so I'm told! Which May be part of the problem.
I did have a clutch of really good friends but all except one have sadly died,and I try not to be a hanger on to her as she has many other friends.
It might be worth a try the u3a,and even if no friends come at least there are interest groups to enjoy!

Try googling (meet up) then your area. Great for social meets with like minded people. Friendship develops over time. Just put yourself out there and see what happens. I don't have a close friend either having been let down in the past I now findit is easier to just have people that I meet up with for various activities

If you have a dog it means you can chat to other dog walkers, when DH and I moved here it was a way to meet new people. I'm also a member or National Housewives Register, WI, and go to a sewing class, and an upholstery class. I think you have to be a little bit brave and just talk to people. Mind you DH is always amazed at the way I talk to people,in buses and queues!

Have a look at the topic page www.gransnet.com/forums/meet_ups_where_are_you

There may be a group already meeting near where you live and if there isn't, you could start a thread on there about a meet-up.

I've recently moved to Caddington (near Luton) and although it's only a 40 minute drive from where we used to live and I keep in touch with our old friends, it would be nice to meet local people to pop out and have a quick coffee....anyone interested?

I organised the recent local meet up for Liverpool and Wirral Gransnet. I posted about it for ages before the meet and we had 4 of us. I'm intending to organise another one before the schools break up and we have the DGC around so if anyone is in the area I'd love to meet you!