Joys of night-flights....

I discovered the answer to "man spreading" on the arm rest on my last flight grannysue. He not only took the arm rest but but leant so that his shoulders and head were in my space. After a few attempts at shoving him back I raised the armrest to 45 degrees to make a kind of slanted barrier that he couldn't lean on and said "Now you stay in your space and I'll stay in mine." It did work.
The rest of it I don't have an answer to!

Oh Eglantine what a great idea.
My fellow passenger not only went to sleep and snored (I could blank that out), but he drooled........

Great when travelling with children as they sleep most of the journey. Hate sitting next to fat people. If they need more than one seat they should pay for an extra one.

On one flight my husband was on the other side of the aisle to me. The man sitting next to me decided to sleep on my shoulder and no amount of me trying to slide him off had any effect. I asked my husband to swap places and the problem was soon solved!

Esspee do you mean that? It seems rather harsh and tactless.

I agree about fat people taking up more room-there should be a slot you have to pass through (like hand luggage) and if you don't fit you'll have to pay for another seat. I understand it sounds harsh Mumof mad boys but it's true! I would also go further and alter your luggage allowance according to your weight. Fatties carry the equivalent of goodness know how many extra cases on their person. I could be allowed an extra case.

Thought "man spreading" was supposed to refer to that thing they do on the Tube - sitting with their knees wide apart. Very tall men cant help doing this sometimes in airline seats
Due to my emigrating sons I have a lot of experience of flying and this is my plan every time for long haul flights. It often works.
Ask to be allocated an aisle seat when you book. Then at least you won't end up in the middle of the row.
Check in on-line about 24 hours before you fly. Choose the option to select your seats. Look to see if there are any rows with unbooked seats. Move yourself to an aisle seat in a centre row. (People often travel in pairs - so you are more likely to get a pair of people filling up the inner 2 seats near the window). The backs of long haul planes are less full than the fronts, so go there. Avoid the rows immediately behind bulkheads (kids) and immediately in front of them (toilet queues). Confirm at check-in that you have an aisle seat.
If your careful plan fails and you don't have an empty seat next to you (which is my ultimate goal), have a good look round when the doors have closed. If there is an emptier row near you, in which there are 2 vacant adjacent seats at the end of a row, be ready. The minute the seat belt signs go out, leap up and claim it. Or you could even make the leap before take off - but the staff might tell you to go back at that point. But they don't mind people moving seats during the flight.

Yes, I'm with Esspee on this. I once travelled on a short 50-seater flight from Philadelphia to Wilmington and shared a seat with a huge gentleman. He had paid for 2 seats, but when it was discovered that 2 of the seats were broken and unable to be used, he let me (as I am very slim!) share half of one of his seats (yes, he was that large!). I was very grateful, but wouldn't have liked to do this for a longer flight.

Well I think this is going to turn into a "getting the popcorn" type of thread.

What spiteful comments about "fat people". I am quite shocked, although maybe I shouldn't be.

Esmee and Newquay - I am overweight but am losing weight slowly. Better off than on. However, you'll be happy to know that I am now paranoid about using public transport because I'm terrified of using up too much space. I'm not vast, and I know I don't, but comments like yours are ones that keep my paranoia going. I'm ashamed to be seen in public because of attitudes such as yours.

You don't know why I am overweight, and I don't need to tell you, except that it has nothing to do with pies. I promise I will never sit next to you on any plane - I haven't dared to fly for years, and I can't see that changing now.

I quite agree about the horrors of fat shaming or whatever it's called but Musicself you have insight about how your size in a narrow seat impinges on others whereas some people feel that the passenger next to them can suck it up. I travelled to India with a Sikh gentleman next to me who spent most of it on my seat. His wife was tiny and spent most of the time with her feet in his lap. He joked about her stinky feet. I quote. I wish I had been stalwart enough to ask him to change seats with her.

I have read all your comments about large people occupying seats.
My thread was actually to dream about the luxury of (say) being able to beautify/read/eat a meal on a flat surface instead of a slope etc.
Just to point out really, that modern short haul flying is now a trial not enjoyable at all.

A fellow passenger in front of me repeatedly bounced her seat off my knees as she tried to recline her seat. Having failed to break my knees she stood up turned around and beat me about the ears for being too tall!

Anatomical reasons for man-spreading are squeezed out as some women continue their quest to further emasculate men.

Fat-shaming is appalling too.

We should pay according to our weight provided the seat we have paid for is sized to fit us. That is why our airplanes have premium economy seating.

I do same as Jessm due to flying to oz every year precision planning but it can work.

Just smile sweetly and say please close your legs your balls can't be that big.
The shock should snap his legs back together ?

What an obnoxious, judgemental person you are Nequay. Of course the discomforrt could not possibly laid at the feet of the airlines who are cramming more seats into ever smaller spaces - the OP said there was no room for her sest to recline. Perhas there should also be a height measurement so that people of a certain height had to pay more!

Let us all be sensible here, and take the emotion out of the comments. All airlines provide an indication of the size of the cabin baggage allowed. That's because it has to fit in the overhead rack and there's only so much space. So there is a principle of equality here - everyone is allowed the same. As far as seats go, the same is true with the exception of the front cabin where wider seats with more leg room are provided for those who want more comfort or don't fit into the regular seats. What's the issue here? Why does it have to be reduced to 'fat-shaming'? The law of physics says you can't get a quart into a pint pot, so the quart must go into a quart-sized seat. My son-in-law is 6' 4" and 17 stone. He can't fit into a regular seat comfortably so he pays for a bigger one - he doesn't suffer with a personality complex as a result - he just accepts the reality of the situation. And frankly, as a small person myself who flew regularly to Hong Kong before retirement, I really resented my personal space being invaded irrespective of whether it was by a large person who didn't fit into the seat, or by a passenger with headphones which leaked music, or by an overly-energetic child kicking me in the back for ten hours. The key here is to accept what airlines can provide, and then to respect other people and try to behave appropriately.

I went on a diet as the economy seats were so uncomfortable, the armrest was a device of torture to my wideload. Now how to shorten my legs... ummm

We had a whole thread some time ago about seat size vs people size and the truth of the matter was shocking. You don't even have to be plus sized to be too big for the average airline seat.

The average bottom is now over 15 inches wide, with some airline seats being a skimpy 16 inches. And that's the average. A great many size 12 people have a bigger bottom than 15 inches so even thinner people are going to struggle. (I'll try and find the chart from the research to show you ).

This is worth a read too www.travelandleisure.com/airlines-airports/shrinking-airline-seats

Although I don't want to be "fat-shaming", I spent a 10 hour flight with a very large lady on one side, and my tall, big [not fat in any way] DH on the other. Being 5'10" myself, it was not a happy experience...
As for people who like to sleep in my lap, I make sure I get up almost every hour, press down on the seat in front [to ease myself out, you understand] until the message is taken!
Paying extra as suggested by many can be a great strain on one's budget - rather than being mean. On the other hand, if one flies by the budget airlines of this world, you should expect what you pay for.

I thought some of the comments here were the sort that bullying teens were guilty of. How bloody rude!!

And here's some science on the subject:

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1863418/

Worth considering if we are to solve our declining fertility.

Totally agree with you Newquay. Definitely should combine weight with luggage. We dread getting a fatty in the third seat too.

As I'm sure "fatties" as you so eloquently put it, dread sitting next to people like you.