When my daughter went to University I paid her rent, costs, clothing, food , phone and bought her a car. This cost a lot of money over the three years ...then she wanted to do a fourth year again at a cost ! I paid for that in full ...by now she had a student job, but I still paid for the expenses, car, etc and sent additional money when I could. I then had a little money come my way and offered to buy her a small terrace house. She said No, I would rather have the money .....reluctantly I transferred it over to her ,explaining that although I would not expect repayment as it was my decision to give it to her, it would be on the understanding that now all the money she would have received when I die will be considerably reduced if not nil after expenses are deducted. This was ten years ago and she has not spoken to me since .........and now that I live in France, the inheritance laws applicable to French estate are different and it is split between children by law. However, if I die before my husband, then HIS daughter would receive any estate left .........I am no longer certain where mine lives anyway ....so should be interesting when the authorities find her if they do and present her with a large bill for inheritance tax .....I have a pre paid funeral policy but am thinking of cashing it in and haunting her so I can see the look on her face .........but then, I am like that ! I have no idea why this happened but since I said there would be no further money I have a good incling ! OK to 'lend' money (I didn't, I gave it) BUT if you need it, then my advice would dont .....unless you don't need it and can afford to lose it but point out there will be no more as now it has all gone ! Luckily I never borrowed anything (unless you count a mortgage, paid in full, or a car loan, likewise !) My mother always said never a borrower or a lender be .....hard if your child asks you directly for a loan, with all the best intentions to pay it back ...until life gets in the way !