The New Argy Bargy cafe, please pop in!?

I heard a booming rendition of Swing Low Sweet Chariot when I was down in the cellar, was that you Jane? Are you pissed btw, you keep falling over?

Oh my merlot, you look stunning! Dont you scrub up well! I feel quite drab next to you.

Big Jim is up next , cor! He looks good tonight, I do like a man in leather ( he has a shammy on his head.)?
He uses it for the windows usually.

Then the Admiral will have his turn singing ‘Who pickled my walnuts’ ( must be a sea shanty.)
I see the bar is busy, so will take the opportunity to go and heat up the food Soop sent us, a stuffed sporran on a bed of neeps and tatties.Yum.

No lemon that wasn't jane falling over; that was her doing the actions to "swing low sweet chariot". She just swing a bit lower than she'd intended. Who's on next me? Me?

Merlot Respect! I know you said you had a lot of tatts, but I never imagined so many.
Don’t strip off just yet, the night is still young.

Big Jim's looking a bit rough isn't he?

Yes, you after the Amiral, what are you giving us?

That's not merlot! That's me!

Oh, he took the shammy off his head, shame, I thought it suited him.

Is it you or Big Jim? can’t be both Chewy ( I like what you have done with your beard btw.)
A bit early to be topless though.

Ah! I have out my specs on now Chewy haha, of course the one in the bra is you!

Whaddya think of my sparkly mini dress? Too short?

Come on Chewy you are on stage!

Pssst, lemon, your dress is tucked up in the back of your knickers.

Right.....here I go.......

Ooops! Thanks for telling me ( that’s what friends are for) and so easily done, the old dress in knickers thing.?

I didn’t know you were a baritone Chewy ( explains the beard though.) Lovely rendition of Ol’ Man River, bravo!
Have a pint ?

There was nobody behind the bar when I arrived so I helped myself to the top shelf and as the loos were locked I'm starting with 'Hold Back The River'

Wow Merlot, you look absolutely stunning!!!
Then again, when you look at the rest of us.......

"Leap up and down wave your knickers in the air.." oh the old song she are the best ones. Come on everyone join in.. ? Oh no! I'm having a flash back. After soop sent me for therapy following the poteen adventure I thought I was cured but now setting foot in the Argy again I can feel myself drifting back.... chewy what are you wearing ? And as for you melot, fabulous outfit. Are you related to wobblybits by any chance

We have an honesty box on the bar Merlot ( which Marydoll ran off with dishonestly last year, to Italy.)
I have unlocked and unblocked the loos now, so you can
‘Go’ whenever you like ( Meno’s wig was blocking one of the loos.)It’s ginger, and I thought it was a drowned cat.?

Ah, crafting is here, now the party can really get going!

I did return the box empty ?

.....and what a great outfit crafting only you could pull off
A green thong, matching wellies and silver boob tassels( and I expect you will do later on.) Have a brandy?

Honesty box? Oh, I thought that was staff tips....and seeing as I had to serve myself.

My turn now, lemme get onstage....

Ta dah dah dah dah ta,
The minute you walked in the room, boom boom, I could see you were a man of distinction, a real BIG SPENDER.....

? I thought I had emptied it, mmmmmmm