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Age appropriate?

(148 Posts)
mollie Fri 12-Jan-18 12:28:45

As I flicked through some magazines today I caught myself thinking ‘everyone’ featured or pictured was at least one generation younger and wondering where magazines aimed at me were. Then I heard my mums voice in my head, raging at another poor M&S manager for not stocking stuff suitable for her (she’s been doing it for the last 20years and I have no idea what she’s looking for) and that put me in my place. The point of all this is that at 60 and 10 months I’m not sure where I fit anymore. Do you? Lots of shops and print media seem aimed at the younger market and I don’t feel ready for those that are targeting the older market. There’s a thriving chick lit market for fiction but the attempt at hen lit just disappeared. Why? Life doesn’t stop at 50 so why don’t we want to read about women of our age?

Someone once said that it’s better to make friends with the younger generation, is that how you feel? Should we pick and choose from everything on offer whether it’s aimed at a different market or do you want stuff that you think is appropriate for your age? Are you happy with things as they are or would you like the gap in the market filled?

henetha Sat 13-Jan-18 10:14:20

That's a good quote, Ninathenana. I strongly don't believe in "age appropriate". One of the better things about growing older is the freedom from all that. Wear what you feel good in, do what you feel great doing, (as long as it doesn't hurt anyone else) and absolutely watch and listen to whatever you enjoy. I think it is one of the better things about life today, - we are much freer than all that old conventional stuff. I'm 80 and I still wear jeans (when I feel like it) and I definitely do not care what people think.

langfordlady Sat 13-Jan-18 10:15:05

Hilary Boyd writes about older women

lionpops Sat 13-Jan-18 10:16:05

I shop or look in all the stores regardless of age. Found a great stripy shirt in Zara for £20,100% cotton. So look in them all if you have the energy.

Margs Sat 13-Jan-18 10:16:22

Indeed - I'm 63 and the overwhelming number of ads and the actual stuff in the shops heavily indicate that the "Yoof" who apparently run the advertising and design worlds reckon I should long ago have turned into Miss Marple, a la Margaret Rutherford......

hildajenniJ Sat 13-Jan-18 10:16:39

What is "age appropriate"? I wear whatever I think suits me, and makes me feel good about myself. I wear clothes from White Stuff, Debenhams, Monsoon, the Regatta outlet at our local filling station, Sainsbury's and QVC on the television. I dress for warmth and comfort most of the time, but I do have some stylish items. Shoes I have problems with, as I have a bunionette which is painful.
I have never been interested in magazines, make up or hair products. At 66 my "style" is set. I can't see me changing now.

Cobweb01 Sat 13-Jan-18 10:16:49

At 55, I understand what you mean but to be honest, apart from wearing mini skirts I don't think anything is out of the question. A skirt above the knee showing a great pair of legs (sadly not me!) is different to a mini skirt. I think we are conditioned to believe we should dress a certain way at certain times in our life and I say WE should decide what we want to wear and when. I have never been a follower of fashion, if I like something and it looks ok on me then I am happy and we should dress according to our personalities in our personal life, job in work life, occasion (e.g. would't turn up to a wedding in jeans) and stop worrying about what others think about our clothes. The wonderful thing is that we have that choice and we shouldn't let anyone take that away from us.

fitwell Sat 13-Jan-18 10:18:03

Im in my sixties have a daughter of 24 we swap clothes I often pinch hers not the tight skinny dresses but tops and coats just wear what you feel is right mind you I do hide those bits that have succumbed to gravity

ajanela Sat 13-Jan-18 10:18:04

Cabbie, I still colour my hair at 72 and my daughter said I should stop. It would be pepper,and salt not that lovely grey so many people,have, my friends said no way. I do have it done professional these days to avoid that all one colour look and ruining bathroom carpets with spills but when I did myself I always used a colour lighter than my natural colour so I had tones, we will know when we are ready to stop.

Pamaga Sat 13-Jan-18 10:18:24

I've just turned 71 and changed my style. I had a Colour Me Beautiful consultancy which helped. I like wearing skinny jeans and tunic type tops, 'age appropriate' or not. My favourite retailer is probably Joe Brown and I have been complimented on JB clothing when I have worn it. I should point out that compliments have come from my 13 year old grand-daughter, young women in their twenties or thirties and from a very elegant French lady who was probably in her sixties. I am not into chiclit preferring crime novels and their audience seems to be cross generation. TV programmes? I love Big Bang Theory, Frasier, Strictly, Bake Off, One Born Every Minute... I tend not to think in terms of age most of the time apart when I get the odd twinge!

Yellowmellow Sat 13-Jan-18 10:18:43

Be who you want to be.....but I think we have to think 'am I going to look like mutton dressed as lamb'. Don't think its anything to do with age, its attitude. I have friends who dressed and 'acted old' in their 40's. Nowadays I head for M &S, Wallis etc, as they offer stylish clothes without looking OTT (although my moan about them is they don't do skirts etc in different lengths. M & S is one of the worst offenders. So a skirt in a nice bright colour is 'mini'. Why can't these shops offer us an adaptation. After all, who has the most disposable income?

Margs Sat 13-Jan-18 10:23:06

The best advantage (IMHO) to being our age is that we can look how we want and do what we want (murder excepted) and get away with it.

Because we are almost invisible - and that IS and enormous advantage.

I sincerely pity (and silently laugh at) all these 19/20 year olds who seem to think it's mandatory to look like - frankly - tarts!

Farrsan2003 Sat 13-Jan-18 10:24:49

I have started buying from a design collection OSKA. Not cheap but quality stylish items. The clothes are timeless and look is modern and different and best of all you can absolutely rely on the fit for your size.
I buy a couple of items each season and mix and match. Because of the quality they wash and wear really well.
I also buy second hand from eBay.
I am 66 and have not looked back since discovering this range. Most of my old clothes have now been donated to charity.
Have a look at www.oska.co.uk. Xx

michellehargreaves Sat 13-Jan-18 10:25:30

At 70 I wear jeans (bootleg and straight) virtually every day. Loosish tops ( more closely fitting on thin days (!) and ordered 3 tops from Phase 8 sale online this very morning (15% of sale price). I think we can wear what we like when we like - who made a rule for the more mature woman?
Having said that, I try not to frighten the horses by exposing the less viewable bits of myself!

michellehargreaves Sat 13-Jan-18 10:26:29

By the way Farrsan, I love OSKA too.

Amma54 Sat 13-Jan-18 10:34:47

Longhaulgran, you made me laugh but in a nice way. The narrow-mindedness of the young can be amusing. I'm somewhat off-topic now but the best sex I've had was at 60+ (now 64). If someone suggests to me that I should be 'past all that now' they'd probably get a smack.

WilmaKnickersfit Sat 13-Jan-18 10:38:09

Just wanted to add that I have no problem at all buying second hand, especially from eBay. It's called 'preowned now though. wink A couple of friends wouldn't dream of doing this and think of it as something people with no money do. They're missing out! grin

GrandmaMoira Sat 13-Jan-18 10:48:58

This thread has given me ideas about shops to try that I've not heard of before.
Aside from clothes, the new Kay Mellor drama Girlfriends is about late middle-aged women dealing with elderly parents and grandchildren. They are younger than many of us but certainly not young and their lives are definitely eventful.

starbird Sat 13-Jan-18 10:57:42

I like reading biographies and detective stories and older people obviously feature in both, but to be honest at 72 I easily identify with women 20 years younger in books and films/ tv programmes. I don’t necessarily want to watch a lot of oldies on screen - mostly the ones featured are not short of money so have more choices than the average pensioner ( eg the real marigold hotel).
I started watching Celebrity Big Brother for the first and last time! Because it was featuring women to celebrate 100 yrs since getting the vote, and with Ann Widdecombe, Rachel Johnson and Amanda Barry ( ? Barrie) I thought it could be interesting. It started out OK, it was nice to see the younger ones asking the oldies serious questions, and doing a makeover on Ann Widdecombe, but once they brought in some men it went downhill fast.

TillyWhiz Sat 13-Jan-18 10:58:24

I used to be praised by the younger generation in my last working place before retirement for the lovely clothes I wore - loved telling them that it was yet again EWM!

sarahellenwhitney Sat 13-Jan-18 10:58:48

Carol 58
I to believe it can be a state of mind and today 's 60 are yesteryears 40. I look at photographs of myself at 60 and see no resemblance whatsoever to photographs of my grandparents when they were 60.

Margs Sat 13-Jan-18 11:15:17

A thought: yesterday I saw a photo of BBC's John Humphrys in a newspaper - wot a wreck!

But he seems to be perfectly respected and acceptable looking like that. And paid a lot.

Now, if a woman on the frontline of the BBC gets so much as a couple of frown lines.....tut!tut!

Dianic Sat 13-Jan-18 11:18:56

What a lovely thread you started OP! I'm 60 next birthday and still wear much the same clothes as I always have! I do think about some things I see online which I'd love to wear, but "Mutton dressed as lamb" does stop me... but I buy from all sorts of shops as do a lot of you. I browse Ebay and New Look, I like my jeans from F+F as they're a great fit, but my jeggings came from Avon this winter (super comfy and lovely quality) and my fave winter outerwear is a black faux leather/fur biker jacket from Primark!

As for TV, I also love crime dramas, including the indomitable Vera! But I also watch all the talent shows too, especially The Voice. I have a soft spot for Sir Tom and adore Will.I.Am.

Since turning 59, I determined to wear more colours and avoid grey and beige as much as possible. I also became an Avon lady and love experimenting with makeup and "looks". I enjoy chatting to my customers about all the latest trends - they're all ages from 20s to 70s, so I have a lovely group of new friends now too!

I feel very privileged to live in an era where we can really please ourselves what we wear, how we live and have the wisdom to know that everything comes full circle in the world of fashion especially!

Pamaga, I too love Joe Browns - I just wish I could afford it more often... wink

starbird Sat 13-Jan-18 11:22:57

I agree about Joh Humphries but he works on radio so maybe they are not as strict.

I think the abandonment of a retirement age for employees has had some unforeseen downsides, one being that some people work well into their old age, drawing obscenely large salaries, and keeping perfectly capable younger (say 50!) people from getting promoted. Jon Humphries is 74 and has a salary of about £600,000.

coast35 Sat 13-Jan-18 11:28:49

Why not tell her to enlist the help of a personal shopper. The service is free although probably best to book if you can. These women can take one look at you and know exactly what would look good on you and they also know exactly where it is located within the store. They do all the running back and forth. They are never pushy and you don’t have to buy if you don’t want to. I think these days it’s more appropriate to have clothes that suit your shape than your age. I’m 72 and I wish I’d used the personal shopper long before I did.

Fran0251 Sat 13-Jan-18 11:33:37

What about non-ageappropriate? I really only see Good Housekeeping. Every woman, unless they are about 20, is airbrushed to look younger. Read an article about a woman who is 60, look at the picture and her face has been touched up. When they featured Twiggy they touched her up so much I didn't realise at first it was her on the front cover. The men don't get this treatment. I complained to the editor and received a polite nothing answer. I call it sexism. Older men are fine, but we have to be airbrushed younger to be acceptable. I would be interested on your opinions.