Parents both sides were pleased on both occasions, only the father was a problem. He was shocked the first time and acted as though it had had nothing to do with him (liar) but he’d get over it. When number two came along two years later he was furious and we didn’t talk for weeks. He didn’t hang around for very long after that.
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Reaction to your pregnancy
(101 Posts)I do not want to spoil the thread that Gillybob has started with the lovely news that her D is pregnant and their reaction to it.
They are so delighted with the news that I wondered just how other members family reacted to the news of their pregnancy.
I had been married for nearly 7 years when I found out to our joy thst I was pregnant after several years of trying.
My H comes from a very large family and when I told my mother our very good news she retorted, I hope you are not going to to copy his mother and fill your house with children, I was devastated.
My in laws had so many GC already that they were not really interested, again disappointment for me.
When my own C announced pregnancy I was so delighted and joyful.
How did you fare?
I announced my first pregnancy on my sister's wedding day, my mother never said a word and showed no emotion. I produced the only GC on our side of the family and I thought she would be thrilled.
My mother's nickname was Mrs Bucket, used by my father since 1948, and boy was she like her.
My parents didn’t have a chance to react to my first pregnancy I was 18 and went into labour (35 weeks or thereabouts) . My mum was horrified and cried so much she became almost hysterical . My dad was VERY angry. It was a lonely place to be .
I had been married for six months when I became pregnant. It wasn’t planned, my husband was still at university and we lived in a rented furnished flat. I was working, but plannned to stay at home when the baby was born. My mother cried when I announced the pregnancy. She had had a hard time delivering my sister and I and also thought our financial position was perilous. My parents in law weren’t so concerned and my MIL was apparently pleased. Our daughter has been a delight to us all her life. We did have some hard times financially. I remember my mother making underwear for her from my dad’s old vests, but looking back they were probably the happiest. My DD and my dad had a very close relationship.
My parents were thrilled, but MiL said "Oh", that was it, just "Oh", while FiL said "Will it be going into kennels? ha ha ha ha ha"!
My in-laws had no relationship with our DS, they weren't interested in me or him!
When told I was pregnant, my parents both cried, happy tears!
My DF died when my DS was 17 months old, which upsets me, but my DM and he had the most wonderful relationship, he was definitely the love of her life!
When I was pregnant with 5th after 1 girl and 3 boys, my aunt (a staunch feminist) said if I had another boy she’d drown him! Fortunately it was a girl
I remember asking my mum how would she like to be a grandmother, and she said only if it’s a girl! It wasn’t, nor were the next 2, but she loved them all the same. In fact, she only got one girl out of 8 GC, though another girl came along after she died (much too early at 64, my age).
I don't really remember my mum's reaction, but I do remember having to pluck up the courage to tell her. We had been married for two years, so not really unexpected. I stood in the kitchen doorway, fiddling with the wooden acorn light pull, and blurted it out. She was a lovely gran, and my Dad was a great grandad.
Shock, horror, not only was I pregnant but my DH was married to someone else at the time. The news went down like a lead balloon.
Joy
My mother kept the knowledge to herself that she had cancer whilst I was pregnant.
She lived long enough to hold both her grandchildren in her arms and through everything they were what held her and us through everything.
It meant so much to her that she would die a grandmother
My father well he told everybody that would listen that he was going o be a grandpa and pushed a pram for the first time!
My parents in-law were ecstatic,
The knitting needles came out and my
DFin law started making wooden toys.
They had lost a baby and MIL had suffered several miscarriages before having my DH who was their only child.
My little sister wanted baby sitting rights
My grandparents were on the next train down.
And us?
we knew how blessed we were
Disinterest from my mother and when DS1 was born she said she still didn't have anyone to carry on the family name. My DS had 3 girls and she was delighted. Not much reaction from FiL but he loved DS to bits. He wasn't so pleased when No2 was on the way as he didn't understand that love is not finite (DH is an only child) but when DS2 came along he loved him so much when he discovered he could love him as much as DS1. When he heard No3 was on the way he was overjoyed. My mother wasn't interested in any of them.
Both sets were ecstatic with first and then rather went down hill with the other 2. One comment was: oh, did you want another one because your sister's pregnant! But the 2 that really stick and hurt: are you going to keep it? from mil and a friend. (Due to fact that the previous dc had a disability and was very hard work, I think)
Oh gillybob no wonder you are so delighted about your DD's news, what a contrast to your parents' reaction!
Slight difference that I was only 18 GillT57
and my DD is almost 33. My parents were quite old fashioned and very embarrassed by my situation and definitely not ready to become grandparents.
I never had any intention of having children, much to my DM's disappointment as I'm an only child. She went on a pilgrimage to the Holy Land with the mother of another only child and they seemed to spend half the time praying for grandchildren. Never ignore the power of prayer - within 6 months I was pregnant and the other DD married a widower with 3 kids!
A friend noticed my teenage DGD was pregnant and burst out 'Oh, you silly girl!' We both raised our eyebrows and DGD quietly left the room, seething.
I told her afterwards that my friend was probably thinking of her own (younger) GD and hoping she wouldn't get pregnant in her teens. I was wrong there.
Soon after the friend told me her daughter was pregnant in her teens. My friend told her she would give her every support and she shouldn't rush into marriage. The young woman insisted that marriage was right for her. It wasn't and the couple soon separated after she went back to her mother every time there was a problem.
A year later my friend asks warmly after my DGD and baby and, I suspect, regrets her unconsidered remark! GD says so she should!
I mean I was wrong that my friend was thinking of her young granddaughter - it was the granddaughter's mother, years ago, she was thinking about! Maybe in that case it would have been better not to marry!
Nonnie - your FiL sounds great, a man capable of changing his mind. As for your mother, what a shame she couldn't open her heart and her arms to her grandsons!
Also, the family name, it was your father's family name really, not her (maiden) family name. What strange things people obsess about!
My DD was 33 when she rang me at home chatted a bit and said "Well what I really rang to say was that I am pregnant', . So what did I do? I cried and she laughed at me.
My Mum and Dad married on the 31st of July 1943 and my sister was born on 25th of April 1944. Do the maths. My parents went off to Aberystwyth on honeymoon. (Dad was in a munitions factory as a reserved occupation. )
I remember dad telling me that ended up in siding some where outside Crewe that night, while an air raid was on in the town. They might have spent a very happy evening. 
DM told me that she 'had no clue' when she got married.
DB arrived nine months later.
I was so nervous about telling my mother because I was in the middle of a divorce and so was my partner who she hated. She was livid saying things like, "Give me some hope, tell me its not his," and "Surely you're not going to keep it." When she asked me, "How?" I lied and told her I'd been sick on the pill even though we knew neither of us was using protection because we were so in love and sure we wouldn't mind if I fell pregnant. She stormed off and, despite the fact we worked together, didn't talk to me for weeks until my birthday when she threw some parcels at me saying, "They are for your birthday but they are for the baby. You'd better get used to not having anything for yourself." However, by the time the baby was born, she had come round and has spent the last 30 odd years spoiling her rotten whilst undermining me as much as possible. I like to think it is because she feels guilty not that she is just a cussed old mare!
My X asked did I want to keep it ! We were married and had 2 already but never in a million years would I not want to keep `it` .
When DS and DIL announced they were having a baby on holiday , the other Nana to be broke down in tears and cried for hours . It was their first longed for baby but she thought she was losing her little girl as they would have to put the baby first and not her as had always been the case. I was horrified by this reaction and it took a long time for me to forgive her selfishness . My GS is the most beautiful , happy baby and is very loved by everyone , even the other Nana .
My parents were very happy when I announced my 1st 2 babies were on the way, but when I said no:3 was en route, Mum did ask how many more there would be !!
I cried with sheer happiness each time my 3 then told me the news about all 5 of my grandchildren being on the way. I was also so fortunate to attend 3 of the births so was over the moon, a wonderful experience.
My mother said from the beginning that I was having a girl, I knew that it was a boy. When he was born my mother gave me a huge amount of home knits for him, unfortunately all pink. And she was furious when I told her that he wouldn't be wearing any of them. I had asked her repeatedly to use yellow or green wool if she didn't want to use blue, but she knew best, I was going to have a girl, so it had to be pink. I don't think she ever forgave me for daring to prove her wrong
My daughter was 35 and engaged when she told us she was pregnant. I was happy but my husband acted like she was 14 and had "got into trouble". After half an hour or so he began to realise it was a wonderful thing to happen. I don't really blame him. The news came out of the blue and we had resigned ourselves to not having grandchildren. Things have moved on and we now have four wonderful grandchildren!
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