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Need to let off steam

(42 Posts)
NanKate Mon 08-Oct-18 22:11:46

I have been a total wally and am so stressed about it.

My soon to be ex-DinL will be leaving the family home soon and I am worried about my two young GSs and how it will affect them. They will live with their Mum half of the time.

So I have been online tonight booking tickets for the pantomime on Boxing Day in order to cheer them up at Xmas. It will be DS, DH, me and the boys. It has cost a pretty penny but it is worth it. My DS thought it was a really good idea to take the boys minds’ off the new family arrangement.

Then my DH said ‘you do know the boys are with their mother on Boxing Day’ 😮

I have sent an explanatory email to the theatre and will phone them tomorrow morning, but I already know theatres are very reluctant to change tickets

What a mess. Thanks for listening.

Grammaretto Mon 08-Oct-18 22:18:57

Could you not change them for another day?

Hilltopgran Mon 08-Oct-18 22:19:37

We booked by mistake at a threatre at the opposite end of the country, they were very understanding and refunded our ticket money. So I hope you are lucky. Could you ask to change tickets for a day your GC will be with you as a second option?

Marydoll Mon 08-Oct-18 22:20:04

Oh Kate, what a shame. I hope you get it sorted. ((((Hugs))))x

Greyduster Mon 08-Oct-18 22:20:38

I should be very surprised if they were unable to resell those tickets, NanKate, especially as it will hardly be a last minute transaction. Panto tickets usually go like hot cakes. Give it a go.

cornergran Mon 08-Oct-18 22:30:39

Definitely worth a try nankate. You may not get the total amount refunded but when the tickets are sold again you should get some. I do understand the knee jerk that comes from worry about the children, we’re in a similar situation. Don’t forget your son was party to the booking so it wasn’t just you being forgetful. The first Christmas is very hard, please don’t give yourself a harder time with self blame.

NanKate Mon 08-Oct-18 22:47:54

Thanks folks. Yes I intend to try and change them to the following Sunday when the boys will be back with their Dad. It gives me hope Hilltop that you managed a refund when we only want a change of day.

Thank you Mary for the hugs.

Sorry to hear Cornergran you too are having similar problems. It is just so sad and affects so many people in a family. Yes my DS said that he too had forgotten about the change over from him to her. This tooing and frowing is confusing for us, how the boys will cope I do not know.

BlueBelle Mon 08-Oct-18 23:23:38

Oh how I empathise I seem to make mistakes now in the process of trying to help I recently booked an air ticket for my youngest child who was ‘very busy’ , (I wish I didn’t get asked) a few days after booking she noticed I had accidentally ( no idea how) managed to add a letter on her surname which shouldn’t have been there I immediately went into the website to change it to find it was going to cost me £115 to make that minor change She rang the airline and they told her one letter would be ok but my heart was in my mouth until I knew she had actually used it successfully and was on the plane
I m sure things will settle and become normal in time Nankate in the meantime how about a calendar and highlighter green for here yellow for there or something like that

annep Mon 08-Oct-18 23:34:45

You weren't a wally at all NanKate. You just made a mistake. Fingers crossed they are kind enough to change them.

NanKate Tue 09-Oct-18 07:40:30

Oh Bluebell how awful for you. So glad it was sorted in the end.

It has really helped all your kind supportive words from my GN friends.

Will report back later.

Maggiemaybe Tue 09-Oct-18 08:36:39

Fingers crossed for you, NanKate. I once had to cancel tickets very close to the performance date and was relieved (and amazed) that the Leeds theatre group offer a full credit note to be used against any production at one of their venues within six months. I hope your theatre is as helpful.

flowers for your family situation.

Diana54 Tue 09-Oct-18 09:17:24

Changing the day may be more acceptable to the theatre.
Getting a group together can be a nightmare because everybody is so busy all the time I never try to arrange things myself I ask one of my DDs to do the arranging then I pay.
It's not me being lazy, they are the ones with the finger on the pulse of what everybody is doing, and if Im paying they are keen to get a free whatever it is.

Mapleleaf Tue 09-Oct-18 09:33:39

Fingers crossed, NanKate. I think you will be alright though, especially as you want to change the date rather than ask for a refund. They might, as Maggiemaybe says, offer you a credit note. Best of luck. flowers.

NanKate Tue 09-Oct-18 09:50:58


Clearly all your fingers crossed and mine has done the trick. DH seeing how upset I was offered to make the call for me, he is a 🌟

And we have better seats too.

Bluebelle I like you idea of a highlighter pen so I know who the boys are with and when.

If you lived near me I would be inviting you all round for coffee ☕️ and cake 🍰.

Maggiemaybe Tue 09-Oct-18 09:53:09

Ah, good news, NanKate. smile We can all uncross now and get some jobs done.

DIL17 Tue 09-Oct-18 09:56:16

At least you were able to switch dates!

May be in the future, get you son to just confirm dates before booking. Split families aren't ideal, but the boys will adjust and so will you.

annep Tue 09-Oct-18 10:38:25

Good news Nankate 😊

moobox Tue 09-Oct-18 10:52:54

I get where you are coming from. There is no finally agreed timetable with my granddaughter, so one is never sure

Rosina Tue 09-Oct-18 10:55:46

So frustrating, when you are being so kind. I hope it will sort out the way you want - if you can change for another day I hope that it won't be a problem. 'Have a lovely Christmas and panto 'experience' with them.

JuliaB Tue 09-Oct-18 11:26:43

Hope you will have a lovely time at the panto! Nice for everyone to have this treat to look forward to, and very generous of you to arrange. I do enjoy reading the kind responses to messages, and so glad this had a happy ending.

PECS Tue 09-Oct-18 11:51:59

I hope that they can exchange the tickets.. otherwise you could sell them on a local community website or Facebook page maybe? Boxing Day is popular for the panto so they should be re-saleable either via the theatre or through another channel. Good luck and don't worry we have all done things like that!

PECS Tue 09-Oct-18 11:54:39

Oh just saw your glad it is sorted flowers

Flossieturner Tue 09-Oct-18 11:54:47

Would you be able to explain to your DiL and then either you or your husband give her your ticket. It might be nice for the boys to do something with both parents. Or maybe there would be an extra ticket for her.

Flossieturner Tue 09-Oct-18 11:55:45

Sorry just seen your update.

jacq10 Tue 09-Oct-18 13:09:15

We have been in the same position as you but, although it was a fairly acrimonious split at the time, ex-DIL was usually quite accommodating (when it suited her!!) but I have the calendar marked up well in advance of our time with DGS as his Dad is quite often working when he's due to be with him and we step in. It's amazing how quickly children get used to things as long as there are no obvious disagreements within family. Of course a lot depends on the age of the children involved.