senior accommodation

We had absolutely no problem selling my late MiL's flat in a retirement complex and for a good price too. Nothing complicated at all. Must be different in England.

My DH and I have live in a big house and the health of DH is deteriorating, and I am not getting any younger of course. We want to stay here, and have thought it through, for example it would be possible to live entirely on the ground floor. The main reason though is that the children and GC are really close by and as it was their family home still come in and treat it as such, not just with visits, but with tasks and admin so my desire is that they will take over more and more, perhaps with paid Carers when the time comes.

I also could live downstairs.
My H did for about a year.
We turned the dining room into a bedroom with an armchair as well and we also already had a shower room downstairs.
I would do the same if necessary.

It does depend on your income but it pays to remember that, if you decide to stay, your capital needs to stretch to any alterations you may need to make either to live on one floor or have access (and not get stranded) to both floors.

The minimum in my list, if I stayed, would be putting in a stairlift and a downstairs loo, paying a gardener and for all other jobs I may be able to do at the moment.

Anja's point about what your income (or your other half's) when one of you is on your own is also important.

Like GagaJo - I wish they would build flats in the village. We have an excellent bus service - another consideration as we will all stop driving eventually. We have a shop and a couple of pubs and a very thriving community.

This is very relevant to me - the photos are being taken of my house on Thursday and it will be on the market next week so keep your fingers crossed for me.

Oh just thought of one other thing we need to consider - distance from children if it is relevant. So far emptying the garage has been the worst job. Even if you are not ready to move it pays to declutter early

Jane10. England's lease laws do seem to lend themselves to people being ripped off. They don't seem to be the same elsewhere.

Very very interesting responses thank you all. My husband and I did downsize (30 years ago!) and I have a small house and garden now. Downstairs loo, upstairs bathroom, , lovely neighbours, Tesco and cashpoint on the corner, buses at the end of the road taking me into and out of London. Perfect really. But still I worry about the future.

I am 88 and live in a three bed semi with large garden, and I have a dog.

My bed and clothes storage is in the downstairs living room also my TV and computer.

The kitchen has room for a dining table. There is a downstairs wet room.

When I planned the garden 20 years ago I made it for privacy and easy maintenance. There are a lot of trees and long grass with paths. No flower beds.

My sons do nearly all the garden work such as it is there is not much. The upstairs is useful if they want to stay for any reason, as they have it all to themselves with own bathroom.

I like my rather untidy arrangements because I decided on my priorities twenty years ago. Optimist, it really is important to make arrangements for disabled living before it happens to you. it may be that you can do this without moving but if not you should move.

PS hard floors are easier to keep clean

While there is the two of us were unlikely to downsize further.
We are in a nice townhouse , a two up two down type.
We can install a chair lift and the laundry can/will be converted to a safe shower , there is already a loo in there.
Within in a few hundred feet we have our gp, chemist , local little supermarket , etc etc. Also public transport.
The place isn't perfect but we can overcome the issues with expenditure

Kirsty from the TV put it even more clearly! She said ‘it is not our responsibility to house our adult child visitors’.

But it is so gorgeous when they are all here. I can't give that up yet.

I'm 78 in a few weeks and I can't imagine giving up my 4 bedroom house we have lived in for fifty-odd years.

I like Alexa's way.

A lot of retirement properties have fallen significantly in value in recent years, often not realising the purchase price and being difficult to sell. Look at what you need to change/upgrade/adapt in your own home to see if that can be done before considering a move. My own Mum, at 95, is still in the house we moved to when I was 11 and manages very well with a cleaner.

I’m in the process of downsizing aged 60. My husband died just before Christmas and since then I have been emptying out our 4 bed house. My sons pushed me into downsizing to a bungalow because I have mobility problems and have fallen on the stairs a couple of times. I have a loo downstairs but no room for a shower, I could sleep downstairs okay but I would stink! I do feel at 60 I am too young for this but my current house is at the peak of its appeal, everything has been replaced, repainted and improved. The longer I live in it the worse it will become and the less I would get for it. I never considered a flat, as the lease often causes problems, and you are at risk of noisy neighbours above, below and next to you. You are always at the whim of the leaseholder. There is also fire and flood risk coming at you from all sides. If there was a fire could you get out easily? In my bungalow there are 3 doors to get out of and windows that I can get out of in a pinch. Yes I am responsible for all maintenance of the bungalow but it is certainly easier than a house. The move has also freed up capital which I can share around my sons and ease their life a little.

We downsized 10 years ago. DH has multiple health issues and we were unable to do the garden (found it difficult to get anyone reliable to help) and general stuff. Whilst we could afford a decorator there was all the hassle of getting jobs done. We decided to move to a flat. Having always lived in detached properties we were not without concerns regarding neighbours etc.
If the block you buy into is too small then there is not enough money coming in for maintenance. If it’s too big you get lost among all the other owners. Buying a flat in a house conversion means there is usually not good soundproofing and plumbing etc is a bit hit and miss.
We bought a flat in a block which was purpose built about 20 years ago. We had a good look round and checked how well it was maintained all the rules and regulations costs of maintenance etc.
We are very happy with the move we made. This flat is one of the nicest places we have lived. All the exterior gardening, painting cleaning etc is done for us. We have a lift and good sized accommodation. We had the bathroom adapted with a big shower and all the doorways are wide enough for wheelchairs. We have had the odd noisy neighbour but anything like that is usually sorted out very quickly by the management team. We have some great neighbours, a lovely outlook, 2 parking spaces and are close to the local town.

Thanks everyone. For the moment I am staying put. Have just taken on a cleaner and a gardener though AGE UK. Will see how this works out.

Re hard floors - we had fitted carpets and extra thick underlay fitted when we moved to our flat from our suburban house. They are very easy to keep - we have a hoover and use it!
However, joking apart, we went for thick floor covering in case of falls so we can avoid breaking our hips if at all possible.

I too am in my 70s, widowed last year and live in a 4 bedroom house with a large garden. Fit and healthy at the moment and still capable of managing most things on my own. Have thought about down-sizing in the future, but family live fairly near, and I have the most lovely neighbours (most of us have been here for 20 years and more). So staying put for a while, and trying not to think what if.....

One aspect that's rarely mentioned re bungalows....

My folks downsized to one in their early-mid 60s when they were still fit and reasonably active. They hadn't particularly wanted a bungalow, but it was all they could find in their chosen area.

After 3 years they decided they didn't like the area after all, and moved again - to a house. And they said they really felt the difference - the lack of stairs during those 3 years had affected their fitness - though it returned fairly quickly.

After my father died in his early 70s my mother downsized again, to a smaller house close by with a very small garden. I know she was very lucky, but she was still well able to manage the stairs when she finally moved into a care home at 89 - only because of worsening dementia.

As for not bothering with spare bedrooms, I was certainly glad she had one for me or siblings, especially as dementia took hold - none of us lived nearby and it made the increasingly needed 'sleepovers' much easier.

The decision is up to you. In my situation, I decided to move into a retirement house instead of living alone. I also didn't want to be a burden to my children. Honestly, it was one of the best decisions I made. A retirement home is not as bad as some people make it out to be. I get to enjoy my remaining retirement days without having to worry about anything. If you're interested, here's where you can learn more. I suggest you be open to different options.

I actually don't think I could afford to move as house prices near me are crazy. All new builds seem to be 4,5, bedrooms and I wouldn't want a bigger place.

This thread is from 2019!!

If I felt the need to downsize to a flat, I’d pick an ‘ordinary’ one, not a purpose-built retirement one, with all the attendant charges and difficulties of selling.

I’ve read more than one horror story of trying to sell when needed, inc. one of someone needing to move to a care home, when the daughter was unable to sell the flat for ages - but hefty charges still had to be paid - and in the end selling it for a lot less than the parent paid.

I gather that many of them can be rented instead, which may be a better option, but the details would need to be very carefully looked into.

My mother did look at a few retirement flats but didn’t like any of them. Among other things, too poky, windows too small and high up to be able to see anything but sky when you were sitting down - and no dishwasher! not even a smaller one, and no space for one. She was particularly incensed when the (20-something) salesgirl said, ‘Oh, they didn’t think old people would want them.’
This was quite a while ago now, though.
She ended up staying in the small, easily managed house which she had already downsized to some years previously.

When i worked as a carer, I went to a lot of people who lived in sheltered accommodation and they absolutely loved it. We were allowed to have the key code to enter the building. Everyone had their own front door everything on 1 level, a pull cord in case of emergency a communal room with Daily activities, a warden on call 24hrs a day the only drawback a few people had was that they had to get rid of a lot of their furniture.

There was also a bedroom/en-suite for family/visitors who lived away and wanted to come up to visit their loved ones. It really was ideal.

My friend lives in 1 now and every time i visit her, the heating is pumping out, i once said to her that her heating bill must be astronomical, she replied that the heating is included with the rent, water and something else, but i forgot. She goes to the communal room for bingo, coffee morning blah, blah, blah. They have a singer on at certain occasions, spring fayre, summer fayre Christmas fayre, and she gets her rent paid by pension something, im not fully aware of all that so i am not giving correct information, all i know is because she is pension age ( she is 74 ) she is entitled to blah blah blah ( no wonder her heating is pumping out hahaha )

The accommodation i am talking about is not 1 of these newly built retirement villages with an entrance hall that resembles The Ritz or swimming pool or fabulous ohh la la balconies, those look absolutely wonderful and very chic, but i can't help thinking that there is absolute nil care whatsoever, it's ££££££££££, and if you need care you're told to go !!!!! whats THAT all about? and lets face it tomorrow's is not our own, so in my view, moving into 1 of the new plush, all singing and dancing, ohh la la retirement apartments is all well and good BUT uncertainty keeps tapping ones shoulder ...

Just my take on the matter.

At 84 I've been thinking about this for some time now.
I looked into various pros and cons last year and decided to stay where I am until my health gives way. Apart from a chronic back condition I am in good health. And I live on one level. I still drive and go out a lot (well, not recently as I've been depressed). Also, it's so beautiful where I live that I am reluctant to leave it.

goldengirl

I came in near the end of that programme but what I saw was very interesting. The upshot seemed to be that the UK doesn't have sufficient properties for older people who are still lively! Sheltered accommodation, it seems, is not as popular as it once was and doesn't suit the baby boomers as much as it used to. More imagination is needed for us 'oldies'. Ideally I'd like to live in a mixed community; the thought of being just with elderly people would drive me nuts!

I agree. I don't think segregating people by age is healthy for society. Younger and older people can learn a lot and benefit a lot from each other's company.

Not sure what the solution is though. The days when family usually lived close by are over. Also longer commutes and working hours mean neighbours are no longer as friendly with each other and regularly popping in and out of each others houses.

My aunt lives in what used to be a friendly village where everyone knew each other. But all of her children moved away to go to University and to work. Even small houses in and around the village became unaffordable for them as its a popular holiday area and they get snapped up at high prices by investors and second home owners. The few people who do buy in order to live in the area commute to the nearest town to work so are not around much.

My aunt has become increasingly lonely and is now moving to a completely different part of the country to live with her daughter.

Sorry OP, I know that's not much use to you.