Feeling adrift

Lucky girl, I do hope you've managed to get some sleep. I woke early and found myself thinking about you, and all the other carers out there, and felt the sadness of it all quite overwhelming, but also life affirming. To love and be loved...not everyone gets that in life and it is a precious gift. I want to reach out and give you a virtual (((hug))).
Many replies on here stress the importance of being kind to yourself, it's easy to say but hard to do.
In a dark period of my life a counsellor told me that everyday I should do at least one little thing that was a treat (to me), as despair comes when our own needs aren't being met. Being British I thought this sounded very self indulgent, but she insisted, and surprisingly I found, slowly, that I began to enjoy my life again, albeit in a different landscape.
You sound to have been selfless for a long time, can you perhaps find time today to give yourself a little treat and a little credit?
All best wishes for today, and your husband is a lucky man. ? Heres a tiger for strength and courage!

Nice Post gramnyparkrun.

I agree with the above. When my late husband went to day care at the hospice I was at a loose end, having previously thought that I'd catch up with this, that or the other.
Suddenly I had a lot of time on my hands and didn't know how to fill it. It was a shock to the system. As others have said you can only be kind to yourself and take one step at a time.

Is there a local carers charity near you? They usually can give support and advice to carers who have come to the end of their caring role?

Wish me luck this morning - grim meeting with health bods and SSD to assess whether health should be paying for OH's care. Both agencies will be fighting to make sure their service does not have to pick up any of the tab. It involves detailed scrutiny of OH's needs and sometimes lasts hours.

As someone said to me the other day "Getting continuing health care funding is as rare as rocking-horse shit!" - quite. He has already been turned down once and I have appealed.

I have to talked to OH about it and he has opted not to be in the meeting - it is so depressing focusing on deficits rather than things he can do. And he does not have the strength to stay the course.

The outcome could make a massive difference to our lives - whether I need to sell bungalow or not hinges on this. DD3 is coming with me for moral support.

Hope all is going well for you, Luckygirl

The CHC assessor was a dreary bloke with not a smile to be had. It was a very challenging morning but I kept my cool and soldiered my way through it. I am not holding my breath - I fully expect it to be turned down again. Then where I wonder? - ombudsman maybe?

I hope it turns out better than you think it will Luckygirl.

Same here, lucky. You must be exhausted. Sleep if you can x

Good luck! We went through all this with my mum. She ended up being funded due to dual incontinence.

We were all surprised but relieved.