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Have you cut down on buying Christmas presents?

(74 Posts)
JenniferEccles Thu 28-Nov-19 14:03:32

I ask as I watched Martin Lewis the other evening talking about how so many people get into serious debt in January.

Of course we all want to buy for our families but it’s very easy for the list to grow and grow isn’t it?

I used to buy for friends but for the past few years we have stopped and we are all relieved at having a few less to think about!

I am sure there are still lots of folk who are worried sick about the expense of it all.

Calendargirl Thu 28-Nov-19 18:35:44

Send DD and family money via bank account to Australia. DS, DIL and 2 GC (14 and 11) who live locally get £25 cash each. Used to buy a bit of something to ‘open’ for them all also, but have given up on that, as a hassle finding something and seemed a waste of money. Might give DH a bit of something if I find anything suitable, this year a few men’s hankies as he needs new ones, but we don’t usually bother with each other. And I give elderly widower next door chocs and biscuits as he always gives us a bottle of wine.
Nothing else, it’s just not like years ago when little presents meant a lot. So many items are just part of the weekly supermarket shop nowadays, things that used to be suitable gifts.

Grannyben Thu 28-Nov-19 18:37:22

I'm down to 8 now; mum, 2 x dd, 2 x sil and my 3 dgc. I think the secret to cutting people out is to do it early. I went through my list after last Christmas and, told them in about March that I was stopping.

I can see that Secret Santa is a sensible idea but I couldn't cope with getting one daughter and having to miss the other one out.

NotAGran55 Thu 28-Nov-19 19:05:46

Other than buying for my own 2 sons our extended family has a rule . Only special needs and family members in full time education get a present .

We stopped buying for adults years ago . My husband and I used to buy each other biggish gifts but reduced that to £50 on bits and bobs .

We then stopped that, and for the last 8 years have spent the money on less privileged young people in the town .

We buy for teenage boys as they are always at the bottom of the list when donations are made apparently.

jura2 Thu 28-Nov-19 19:07:35

Only buy for children and grandchildren- and whomever we spend Christmas with, if it is not them.

BlueSapphire Thu 28-Nov-19 20:58:10

A main present for close family and a good friend, but that's it. Oh, and I will probably buy chocolates and wine for some neighbours who go out of their way for me.

Froglady Fri 29-Nov-19 10:38:52

I haven't cut down on buying presents as there's only 12 in my family to buy for and about 5 friends so I don't have the need to cut down - whether that will change when great great nephews and nieces appear I'm not sure but would hope not.

marmar01 Fri 29-Nov-19 10:48:19

started secret sana for the adults afew years ago and love it.£50 each so everyone can get a nice present still. But the small children still get what ever they ask for from Gran and grumps. Made life a lot easier an not so much stuff that you dont need lying about.

Kim19 Fri 29-Nov-19 11:14:30

Have cut out buying for those who present a challenge. Worked out that this was only because they already have so much and don't need any more 'stuff'. There are other ways of treating those we care for and it doesn't have to be at the insane Christmas period - which I love in general, incidentally. Try like mad to avoid personal pressure and am having reasonable success. Hallelujah!

Gingergirl Fri 29-Nov-19 11:21:10

On the whole, we buy according to what we can afford...and if we didn’t have the money, we would...and have done in the past....cut down on gift spending. I think it’s a lovely thing to give a gift to someone-and to receive one-and that doesn’t have to be anything expensive. I’m not personally a fan of secret Santa. I think it makes present exchanging an impersonal experience. We aren’t huge consumers and so I try to buy thoughtfully. Oxfam for example,has lots of nice things and some aren’t expensive at all. This year I’m giving a sponsorship for a hearing dog as a gift as well, to my dog mad daughter in law. This is a bit more expensive but some donation/sponsorship schemes aren’t, and you are spreading the cost by having a small monthly payment and it’s all for a good cause. Its a case of being creative I think and deciding how to approach Christmas and not getting too caught up in all the often expensive hype.

Theoddbird Fri 29-Nov-19 11:23:56

My two children who have children I just but for children at Christmas. My son and his wife do not have children so they get a present each. I have a limit on what I spend. Grandchildren between 25 and 30 pound. The oldest and his girlfriend I have bought two Crisis at Christmas places on their behalf in the past as they want for nothing. I have done this for son and his wife before now as well.

hazel93 Fri 29-Nov-19 12:12:17

Hands up - I do spoil my GD (only grandchild ) and at 15 months old she won't have a clue !
This year close family coming to me on Boxing Day ( no kids apart from GD )hospitality will be all they expect, a rule everyone appreciates.
At some point, during this happy gathering OH, after a few sherries, will bang the table and enquire of me "So how many bl**dy goats/ chickens/ cows have you now given me over the years , maybe we should visit Africa and see how they are all doing. " Maybe this year I'll buy him socks !!

JenniferEccles Fri 29-Nov-19 12:22:17

hazel93 ?

sodapop Fri 29-Nov-19 12:29:46

gringrin hazel93

Blondiescot Fri 29-Nov-19 12:43:07

No, because I buy very few anyway. Husband and I don't give each other presents, so I only have to buy for daughter, son and daughter-in-law, grandson and my elderly inlaws. Six presents in all. I don't believe in going overboard with presents - even if money was no object I'd be the same. It's about spending time with family, not material things.

Saggi Fri 29-Nov-19 12:46:13

I buy for my children (2) , grandchildren (2)and one excellent friend, who makes the most mouthwatering mince pies you have ever tasted...she’s made me 3 dozen every year for thirty years ...I always reciprocate by getting her either a bottle of her favourite wine or Rum which she loves. She refuses the flour or mincemeat to help with expense, so it’s my way of thanking her. She makes her pies for lots of people at Xmas ...at the last count she bakes 40 dozen! This year she might have to cut down as she also works ad-hoc for local council whenever there is an election...this year is the first ‘near xmas’ election , so she’s gonna be very busy . Hope she does my pies first!

jenni123 Fri 29-Nov-19 12:47:39

I start my christmas shopping in January when I buy my Xmas cards in the sales. Then throughout the year I buy things that I feel the person i am buying for would like and it goes in a box to be joined throughout the year by other bargains I see. Yes, sometimes I end up with 2 things for one person but then they will usually receive one for a birthday. I buy for about 14 people and only have a state pension + pension credit so can't buy everything at once. I also give small xmas box in a card for the cleaner/handyman in my sheltered building, also the lady that cleans for me once every 2 weeks, it works for me and this is how I manage as I do buy my family quite a lot of things, not just the one gift.

M0nica Fri 29-Nov-19 12:50:36

I budget for Christmas, no more than I can afford, and do not overrun it.

I have never seen any need to buy a child everything it wants, in fact I would never do so. I have never felt any need to show-off by how much I spend.

In fact if you look at the 'best christmas present' thread, you will see my story of our Charity shop Christmas, when money was scarce and how much DC enjoyed it.

Cabbie21 Fri 29-Nov-19 13:33:52

I never know what to say when family ask me what they can get me, and it is much the same when I ask them. The teenager GC just want money. What I mostly would like is to see them more often. I dont need things and actually nor do they, so I find present buying very difficult.
Another problem with my son’s family is that I rarely see them open their presents, so I don’t get any feedback, or thanks. No wonder I find it dispiriting.

H1954 Fri 29-Nov-19 13:38:13

Oh yes! As soon as the grandchildren reach 18 that's it, no more presents for Christmas or Birthdays, particularly as two of them NEVER ever acknowledge the gifts in the past! The other six are lovely and always write a little note or send a text or give a special hug when we see them.

We never buy gifts for friends or neighbours either. Between us we have 7 siblings and I would not know where to start on buying gifts for those. Instead we have special meals or outings during the year where we all club in together and it's so much more rewarding than a gift that is not always he right choice.

threexnanny Fri 29-Nov-19 13:49:05

We all still exchange gifts within the immediate family and when asked what I want I try and have a few ideas for things which will be under £10.
I also buy for a relation who is single and lives alone. as does a good friend. Both can afford to buy whatever they want for themselves but I give each a gift just so they each have a parcel to open.

annifrance Fri 29-Nov-19 13:59:14

We started Secret Santa 3 years ago for adults. A £50 limit and reference to A mazon wish lists. Everyone gets a decent present and what they would like. Much easier and less expensive. A great success. The DGCs still get their usual number of presents.

I have also said this year no rubbish stocking fillers and no plastic. We have also cut down drastically in these.

Nanny27 Fri 29-Nov-19 14:16:49

We buy for AC and spouses. I could never leave them out at Christmas I don't love them any less because they are over eighteen. As someone up thread said. Little gifts that have been carefully chosen are delightful to both give and receive. All GC, siblings and parents also have a gift. We don't spend huge amounts and spread the cost over several months.

Madmaggie Fri 29-Nov-19 14:47:45

Oh dear Christmas shouldn't be the trigger for so many worries & problems but it can be. It shouldn't make me (& many others) sad but it does. We're the good eggs who never mind stepping aside, counted on to be'understanding' and now it just seems taken for granted. I was brought up never to complain and now I realise I should have been more assertive. The in laws, the absentee dad who only appears annually all take precedence. Yes, I admit, I feel its unfair, it hurts.

Musicgirl Fri 29-Nov-19 14:52:37

I don't have grandchildren yet but l have three grownup children, a husband and a widowed mother. I will buy for my closest aunt and uncle (l have made up a hamper for them), my sister, brother-in-law and their two grownup children, my brother (he has a very well paid position and everything he needs so l buy him a present for developing countries from Oxfam in his name and a small tin of biscuits to open), my closest cousin and her husband and two children and also a few small gifts to close friends. I also send lots of cards. As a private music teacher, l give each of my pupils a card and have a tub of Heroes from which they are allowed to choose two. I know people who make stockings for everyone in the house, but once my children were in their late teens we stopped this (never did it for adults anyway).

Namsnanny Fri 29-Nov-19 14:59:34

Gifts have morphed into concerts or theatre trips throughout the year.
Children get what parents want us to give them.