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Don’t tell me that! The things our adult children tell us that we wish they wouldn’t

(55 Posts)
morethan2 Sun 22-Dec-19 08:25:58

When I was bringing up my children I clearly remember wanting to do it differently from my parents. One of the things I felt it was important was that they could talk/confide in me about anything. Oh there are times I wished I’d failed. There have been times I’ve wanted to put my hands over my ears and shout NO I’d rather not know that. It doesn’t help that you can’t share your concerns (well unless you have a sister like mine) with anyone. One of my adult children has recently shared something I wish I didn’t know. I’m not overly worried, or at least I don’t think I am! But as they were confiding in me I clearly remember thinking I would never ever have told my parents any of my personal problems. They were blissfully unaware of any of my troubles or at least I think they were. My father in particular would have hated to know anything that made us unhappy. I’m just musings really on how our actions no matter how well intentioned can come and bite us on the bum,

Urmstongran Sun 22-Dec-19 20:37:45

When our girls were late teens they shared everything. (Still do, bless). But oh how much did I want to be those parents walking round with a big daft grin on their faces saying ‘mine wouldn’t/don't’. Hmm.

Some of those parents were strict and judgemental but didn’t know the HALF of what was going on with their kids!!

Our girls shared stories about secret (from the parents) friends abortions, tales of drug taking. Etc.

I had a few sleepless nights back in the day but felt honoured I supposed that I was a trusted adult.

Grammaretto Mon 23-Dec-19 14:56:41

I don't have that problem LoveOc. My 4 are independent and wouldn't dream of asking us for money. Maybe it's because we don't have much.

I was quite shocked when I discovered that an elderly widower I know, is constantly being asked for money by his feckless AS.
I was angry on his behalf but for all I know it makes him feel needed.

sodapop Mon 23-Dec-19 15:09:58

I did find out from my daughters when they were older about the escapades they were involved in during their teens. I'm quite relieved I didn't know.

Fennel Mon 23-Dec-19 16:09:23

Part of the problem is the change in standards over the generations.
In my teens Dad wouldn't even allow me to go into a pub. Girls had no birth control methods (except saying no).